


The Road From Nadir

by stargatefan_archivist



Category: Stargate SG-1
Genre: Action/Adventure, Angst, Drama, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Missing Scene, Smarm, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2003-12-09
Updated: 2003-12-09
Packaged: 2018-10-06 20:01:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 66,459
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10343559
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stargatefan_archivist/pseuds/stargatefan_archivist
Summary: SPOILERS: Set after Shades of Grey but before Nemesis.(you’ll see why!) References to lots of episodes.SUMMARY: A routine mission goes badly wrong and SG-1 must deal with the consequences. (Nadir: the lowest point; the point of greatest adversity or deepest despair.)





	

**Author's Note:**

> Note from Yuma, the archivist: this work was originally archived at [Stargatefan.com](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Stargatefan.com). To preserve the archive, we began manually importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in 2017. I e-mailed all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address on [StargateFan Archive Collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/StargateFan_Archive_Collection).

Stargate SG-1 FanFiction - THE ROAD FROM NADIR

##  THE ROAD FROM NADIR

##### Written by Rebecca Preen   
Comments? Write to us at becky.preen@ntlworld.com

  * Content Warnings: Violence.
  * SPOILERS : Seasons 1-3
  * SUMMARY : Nadir: the point of greatest adversity or deepest despair.
  * R [Hc] [D]



* * *

**  
**

1

The cold seeped into her very bones as the sun began to set again. This was the second sunset she’d watched on this planet. SG-1 were well overdue now and soon someone would come looking for them. Someone always came looking for them.

She shifted her weight slightly, trying to relieve the pressure and pain on her ribs. She just moved it to the other side. The cold made her shiver again. Beneath her the bed frame creaked. She winced, not from the pain but from the thought of what was to come. She lay very, very still and almost dared not breathe. 

There was movement outside, a shuffling sound. A sharp snap of metal grating against metal. A shaft of light darted through the hatch. 

Like a statue she remained still. A mutter, a murmur and then darkness again. She held her breath for a few moments longer. The rattle didn’t come. She let out the breath, nearly falling into a racking cough. She stifled it and slowed her breathing. 

Maybe they wouldn’t come for her tonight. Maybe….

Daniel awoke with a start, cursing as he realized he hadn’t been dreaming. Everything was slightly blurred. He shook his head to clear it then realized his glasses were missing. He couldn’t remember where they’d gone. 

The room was vast and full of people. They were eating, heartily. The smell was intoxicating. His stomach had been deprived for so long it ached and rumbled. 

His hands were tied behind his back, he’d been thrown in the corner after the last beating. Things weren’t so busy when he’d passed out. As he flexed his left leg, pain arced up through his knee. "Shit," he cursed. 

One of warriors headed towards him. " _Rebarch tu druand,_ " he snapped. 

Daniel ducked the punch. The large warrior grabbed his short brown hair and slammed his head against the wall. He covered Daniel’s mouth. Daniel understood. _Keep quiet_. Hell of a way to learn the language. The large one went back to his seat and the meal continued uninterrupted. 

Daniel Jackson tried to listen to the many voices and strained to pick out anything he understood. He knew so many languages that there had to be some connection. They were after all human… At least genetically. He’d often thought that this was the best part about the SGC. The opportunity to observe different, often ancient, Earth cultures at first hand. It was a job many anthropologists would kill for if they knew such an opportunity existed. This dinner would have been fun, if only they didn’t keep hitting him, and he knew where the others were. His stomach rumbled again. He listened.

Jack O’Neill was all but sure he was back in Iraq. Nothing was broken this time, actually he was in pretty good shape, considering. Besides, it didn’t smell like Iraq. 

Teal’c, he knew, was in the cell next door. Junior was working overtime, the locals didn’t take too kindly to resistance. 

Jack’s own face was swollen and bloodied. When they came the second time he’d limped up and taken what they gave without fighting back. No sense in making things worse. Iraq had taught him that much. But this was different. In Iraq at least they’d asked him questions. They wanted to know everything. Something, _anything_. 

Jack didn’t have a clue who his captors were, nor what they wanted. It was all very strange. It didn’t follow normal interrogation patterns for any enemy he’d ever fought. But then they’d not been to this planet before and this lot wouldn’t have heard of the Geneva Convention anyway. 

He shivered, the temperature was dropping again. Jack O’Neill, Colonel, United States Air Force and commander of SG-1 curled up into a fetal ball, trying to conserve heat. There were no blankets. He had to think of a way out of this. 

He hadn’t seen Daniel or Carter since they had surrendered. _Surrendered_. In retrospect that still seemed like the worst decision he had ever made… ever. Even though it had merit at the time, now he wasn’t so sure. _No, don’t go there._ He’d had this conversation with Teal’c twice today already. They were vastly outnumbered and cut off from the Stargate. _‘I cannot think of an alternative course of action, O’Neill, in which we were not killed instantly’._ He had a point, dammit. But where the hell was Carter, and if they were doing this to them, what would they do to her? 

Jack smiled to himself, hoping that this lot had a paradisaical harem, then he caught himself and hoped that they hadn’t gotten round to trying the new girl yet. Carter would be okay, she was a tough cookie, she could look after herself. He pushed the other thoughts from his mind. An active imagination was not a good thing at times like these. She and Daniel were probably enjoying the hospitality and trying to secure their freedom. 

Soon, it wouldn’t matter anyway. They were overdue and Hammond had probably already sent out a search party. He hoped they came in numbers. _Big numbers. Marines, and lots of em…_ They might need SG-9. Diplomats have their uses and it might be the quickest way to stop the tide of bad feeling that was washing over him right now. His team was split up and no amount of wishful thinking was going to make that better. 

He was really worried about Carter. These guys weren’t very nice and it suddenly occurred to him that he had not seen any women except Carter since they came through the gate. The harem idea seemed the most attractive, but he didn’t want to think about it anymore. 

He whispered to Teal’c. There was no reply. _Probably still in Kelnoreem_ , he figured. He turned over and tried to get comfortable. He’d try again later. 

She wasn’t entirely sure how she’d got into this state. Normally she prided herself in being well turned out. A neat and tidy slender woman, who could stand straight in any situation with confidence in herself and her team. 

She rubbed the side of her head, it was sore. Her shirt and combat pants were also stained with her own blood. A couple of cuts were still oozing. She lay awake in the cold, dark cell, desperate to keep still and quiet. It was hard not to move from the shivering. 

Suddenly it started deep in her chest and rumbled through her body. Tears welled up as she tried to stop the eruption, she failed. The rich red blood frothed as her racking cough cut though the silence of the still evening. 

The movement was there again, the shaft of light. 

She couldn’t keep still, she coughed again and again. 

The keys rattled in the door. They entered the room. 

She squinted against the light, and drew herself back into the corner like a frightened animal. Now she couldn’t stop shaking. She sniffed, as they advanced closer. One was saying something to her, quietly, almost comforting but he was grinning. She drew her legs up making herself smaller. It hurt to move and she rested her head on her knees, letting her blond, blood-matted hair spill over them. 

In one swift move they pulled her roughly from the bed and out into the corridor. Her heart raced, this was different. Where were they taking her now? Back to the others? She was coughing again, no blood this time, but the pain was so intense she tried to speak but couldn’t. They led her through a darkened corridor, there were lots of doors, most had the cell hatches closed. She started to strike up a conversation, but the leading guard turned and slapped her face and hissed a command at her she guessed was ‘Silence!’ 

As they picked her up from the heap she’d fallen into, she heard it. Quiet and muffled in the distance. "Carter?" 

"COLONEL!" she screamed back. 

They fell upon her, pinning her to the cold stone floor. A gag appeared. They stuffed it roughly into her mouth. 

She stared coughing again and had to swallow the blood. Tears welled up as she was quickly dragged away. She could hear the shouts in the distance calling out to her. So Colonel O’Neill was alive. _Where the hell are you taking me?_ her mind screamed. 

The men pulled her up some steps. It was getting warmer, she could hear a background rumble that grew into a hubbub of noise. The sweet smell of roasting meat wafted over her and she suddenly realized she hadn’t eaten since leaving the SGC. Once in the hall she was overwhelmed by the intensity of the smell. She looked around desperately. She couldn’t see any of SG-1 and she couldn’t see another woman at all. 

A sickening feeling settled in her stomach. Yesterday had eclipsed her all time bad day record but she didn’t think it could get any worse. Suddenly she realized it could be. There were worse things than dying.

Jack’s head slammed back against the wall. Again. His blood boiled. Carter’s voice had been cut off, he’d heard her cry out in pain. He didn’t like it. The men left, shouting obscenities at him. The was something about swear words that cut across the language barrier. He uselessly hurled a few of his own, and rubbed at his head. Another bump was forming. At this rate he’d look like the elephant man by morning. 

Teal’c’s voice rumbled from the next cell. "It will do no good to provoke them, O’Neill".

"Provoke them? Whadda you mean provoke _them_. They’re the ones doing the provoking. Teal'c, if they’ve hurt Carter I’ll…"

"You have said many times that Major Carter is capable of looking after herself, O'Neill. I believe that she is, and so must you."

"Teal’c," Jack closed his eyes, tiredly, "take a look at us, Teal’c. I don’t think we’re doing a great job of looking after ourselves here. What chance does she have? Did you see any women here? I dunno, I…" his voice trailed off.

"We will prevail, O’Neill," Teal’c intoned firmly. "Now we must rest and grow strong again."

"Yeah," Jack mumbled, "strong enough to kick their sorry little asses across the galaxy."

Dr. Daniel Jackson’s inquisitive mind had taken over. He was absorbing the cacophony of voices and analyzing everything he saw. This was the first time he’d seen a social group of these "people". 

They were dressed in a combination of ancient Egyptian and Arabian costume. There were no women present in the room, the servers were young men. Most of the warriors at the tables were swathed in ponchos of heavy cloth, woven in stripes, the colors were muted greens and browns, like camouflage. Jack had called them ‘Ponchos’ when they were captured. It was as good a name as any for them. 

Their weapons were mainly hand to hand instruments. During SG-1’s capture and imprisonment he’d seen only knives, blow pipes - with who-knew-what on the darts - and bows and arrows. The Ponchos had played around with their weapons, but hadn’t figured out the safety catches and had just thrown them into the river. 

The conversation was getting interesting at the table closest to him, he narrowed his mind and focused on the two voices. They were speaking in a low conspiratorial tone, it was like Egyptian, but a dialect so obscure he was struggling to catch anything more than the odd word. _"Warriors…enemy… strangers…"_ They looked over at him, not looking pleased. Daniel thought it best to look away. They laughed heartily and returned to their meal.

There was a scuffle in the far corner of the room and everyone’s attention turned in that direction. Daniel stood up to see better. A guard pushed him back to the floor. 

The cooing and whistling spread as the entourage picked its way across the hall. There were several guards and in the middle they were dragging something. His stomach sank as he recognized the matted mop of hair and combat fatigues. He stood up again and called across the room, "SAM!" 

The mop snapped round to his direction, his guard was pushing him towards her. She was a mess. Her hands were tied behind her and she was gagged. "Sam," he was still saying, "Sam. Jesus, what have they done to you?" 

He was beside her now and he could see the desperation in her eyes. She coughed, a sickening, guttural cough. Blood leaked out the side of the gag. 

"Sam, everything’s gonna be okay." He lied, feeling he had to say something. 

Someone kicked him in the back and he tumbled onto her. She cried out, causing the crowd cheer. Someone hoisted them both to their knees as the baying mob fell silent. 

Suddenly he realized they were now in front of the leader. He was pointing at them and making a speech. Daniel caught only a few words. _"Enemy… spies… justice for the fallen…"_ then he looked directly at Daniel and spoke softly, " _…Reveal…_ " The rest was a garble. 

"I don’t understand what he’s saying," Daniel muttered to Sam. "It’s something about revealing something. But what?" 

Daniel looked up, he spoke the Egyptian equivalent of _I don’t understand_. This earned him a kick in the small of his back. 

Sam squeaked from behind her gag, pleading with Daniel to make some sense of it. 

"Sam I don’t get it. It’s so obscure I…" 

The leader had advanced towards them and was now standing over them both. He spoke several words very slowly and clearly and ended the sentence with a gesture at Sam. 

Sam’s eyes pleaded for a translation but Daniel didn’t have one. He shrugged and tried the _I don’t understand_ line again. 

The leader barked angrily and signaled a guard, who began to circle Sam menacingly. 

Daniel desperately started babbling in the ancient language closest to the natives. 

The guard stopped in front of them and cradled Carter’s face in his hand. She recognized him from before, but there was a deeper recognition too. She’d seen this face at the SGC. Her mind was so cloudy she couldn’t place where. The man gripped her chin and squeezed hard. She forced a defiant stare onto her face. Suddenly he slapped her on the already growing bruise on her cheek. She reeled under the blow, letting only a small noise escape as she doubled over.

Daniel Jackson called out to the leader and was shouting _‘NO!’_ as loud as he could muster. The leader silenced the crowd with a hand. Sam Carter straightened herself up. "Please, stop! I just don’t understand what you want from us." Daniel added.

The leader leaned down over Daniel and repeated his slow sentence. His breath was heavy with alcohol. He drew back, Daniel tried another language. The leader settled slowly back into his chair, and motioned for Sam to be brought forward. She was hoisted to her feet then dumped in front of him. He looked her up and down slowly. He reached out and lifted up her shirt. Carter held her breath. The leader scowled at the bruising and pulled the shirt back into place. "Kritch marr darch megth." The guards nodded respectfully and dragged her away. 

"Where are you taking her? Sam? Sam, I’ll figure this out! I will!" His eyes met with hers as she was dragged away.

Carter and her tormentors headed back down into the dungeon. Now she started to feel really alone and empty. This wasn’t the way she intended for it to end. She didn’t know why this was happening. None of it made sense. She knew she was badly hurt. If she took another beating she probably wouldn’t survive it. On the other hand, if they just left her in that cold cell overnight she might not wake up. Ever. 

Where the hell was SG-6? SG-6 always came, like four coming after three…. 

_  
_

Not this time… 

Considering every mess she and SG-1 had got into and out of over the years, it struck her as a useless and really stupid way to die. 

* * * * *

SG-6 were the sneaks. They thrived on sneaking in, looking around and making the dramatic rescue. But Parker's wasn't adversed to calling in the big guns when necessary, which usually meant SG-3. 

Parker and his team had passed through the gate and reccied the enemy stronghold from a ridge. As a covert insertion team they had avoided contact with the hostiles and laid low. Parker couldn’t get used to the idea of turning up on a planet and saying "take me to your leader". That was usually how SG-1 operated and, more often than not, how they got into trouble. This was probably no different to the dozen other times he'd gone looking for this team before when they were overdue. Parker smiled to himself remembering some of the stupid excuses… 

On arrival they hadn’t met much resistance and headed towards the town lights. They hadn’t seen any evidence of SG-1 until they took a shortcut across the shallow river where they found SG-1’s 9mm sidearms and MP5s. The weapons were still loaded, magazines full and safeties on. Very odd. SG-1 were obviously here. Somewhere. 

At the base of the main building in the town, there appeared to be small barred windows. Using their laser microphones they had established that indeed, Jack O’Neill and Teal’c were being held there. The prisoners were quietly discussing if they should have surrendered or not. They had been outnumbered and tried the take-me-to-your-leader approach. It appeared to have backfired. There was no sign of Major Carter or Dr. Jackson… Well, two out of four was good enough to go in. SG-3 would have to make up the rest themselves. Parker was slowing realising this wasn't going to be one of the funny ones to banter about over the next team leaders meeting. No, this time SG-1 had really gotten themselves into trouble and for once it didn't look like to Goa'uld were responsible. 

Parker gave the signal for SG-6 to fall back to their rendezvous point. 

"Sounded like they’re having a party," Parker muttered to his second, Croft.

"Yeah, and we’re about to crash it." 

They jogged back to the gate slowing only to traverse the river more quietly. The two warriors on guard at the gate had been easy to neutralize. SG-3 poured through the gate on time. It hissed as the wormhole collapsed and then all was quiet again. The plans were finalized. SG-3 and SG-6 all formed up and moved out silently to join the party.

**  
**

2

The SG teams were close, they lived and worked at close quarters, in alien, and often hostile environments. They looked out for each other, they took care of business and kicked butt when necessary. SG-3 particularly liked the direct, frontal approach. Lots of noise and pyrotechnics. But this didn’t seem like the right time. Colonel Morgan had stepped up to take over SG-3 after the departure of the disgraced Colonel Makepeace. It hadn’t taken him long to earn the trust and respect of his team. Now he led them quietly and invisibly towards the target. Parker had his laser mike out again. He was pointing it towards the little cell windows on the south side of the building where he had heard O’Neill and Teal’c earlier on.

A soft mumble drifted across the open ground and between the trees. In his cell, Jack could now hear the raucous laughter. "Seems like we’re missing the party, Teal’c."

"So it would seem."

"Cassie’s birthday tonight, too."

"The celebration will wait for our return."

"Teal’c, kids hate you missing their birthdays, its like the one thing you just can’t get away with."

"I believe that Cassandra will understand, O’Neill."

"Yeah, maybe. If we ever get to tell her."

"We will."

"Yeah…" Jack’s mind wandered for a moment. "Damn," he cursed, "I missed the final too."

"Final of what?" Teal’c asked flatly.

"The cup, Teal’c, the Stanley Cup. You remember, we were all going to that hockey game?"

"I remember"

"Well it was last night."

"Who triumphed?" Teal’c said evenly.

Jack raised his eyes to the heavens. "That’s just what I was thinking."

Parker was smiling, "Definitely O’Neill and Teal’c, Colonel, they’re talking about hockey."

"Any sign of the others?" Morgan asked.

"No sir, I’ll try around the other side." Morgan nodded and waved him forward. He signaled to the flank to go around and cover Parker.

"Midge," Morgan called over his second in command, "what do you think they’re up to, there are hardly any guards."

"Too busy partying sir, maybe we should hang out until there’re really drunk."

"Mmmn, let’s wait here for Parker to report then we’ll move. When’s sun-up?"

Midge checked his watch and did the sums, "About 5 hours sir."

"Good, we’ve got some time then."

* * * * *

O’Neill had dozed off when he heard the hubbub in the corridor. The door to his cell rattled open, he stood up ready to charge the entrance but something was shoved unceremoniously through the door into a heap in front of him. "Carter!" She coughed once and then laid still. He tried to rouse her, calling her name and shaking her gently as the door slammed shut.

"Colonel O’Neill?" Teal’c inquired.

"Jesus, Teal’c, she’s been beaten up. She looks pretty bad." He untied her hands then lifted her off the cold, stone floor. She stirred and recoiled as he touched her. "It’s okay, Sam, its me, Jack, I’m not gonna hurt you." 

One side of her face was so swollen she couldn’t open her right eye. The other blinked open and struggled to see in the dim moonlight. "Colonel?"

"Yeah, Carter, I’m here, you’re gonna be okay" he soothed.

"Carter, have you seen Daniel?"

"Yessir.." she muttered distantly.

"Carter?" O'Neill's snap made her eyes widen in terror for an instant. 

"Sir?"

"Carter, where is Daniel? Is he okay?"

She blinked, letting her dazed mind formulate an answer. "Main hall…" she shuddered. "They keep asking him… Stuff…"

"What kinda stuff?"

She shook her head "He doesn't know…" 

"Well don’t worry, if anyone can talk us out of this it’s Daniel."

She shook her head sadly. "He doesn’t get it..." she muttered.

Her eyes wandered around the dingy cell. "Teal’c?"

"I am here, Major Carter, in the next cell."

Satisfied, her eyes bobbed shut. Then a cough rumbled deep in her chest and exploded out of her in a frothing mess.

"Jesus Carter!" O’Neill exclaimed. 

"Ribs," Carter managed as the cough subsided. She started to lift up her shirt. 

O’Neill pulled it up halfway and winced. 

"Bad?" she asked. 

He pulled the shirt back into place. "Not great, Carter, but you’ll be just fine." He gently pushed the hair out of her eyes and smiled at her. "Don’t worry, I won’t try and put a splint on ‘em." She grimaced a half smile and coughed lightly. 

"Look Carter, its gonna get a lot colder in here and we need to rest. Slide over and you can hang onto me."

"Just like Antarctica," she wheezed.

"Nothing could be that damn cold, but we haven’t got blankets, so snuggle up." O’Neill let her drape herself over him. She wriggled a little trying to get comfortable then settled, holding him tightly. O’Neill was deliciously warm in the chilly air. A similar thought crossed his own mind as he wrapped his arm gently around her.

"Try and get some sleep, Major. We’ll figure this out in the morning."

"Yessir," she whispered sleepily.

O’Neill had dozed off when scuffling broke out again. They appeared to be opening Teal’c’s cell.

"Daniel Jackson," Teal’c was saying, "Daniel Jackson, wake up."

"Teal’c?"

"Daniel Jackson is unconscious, O’Neill. But alive. He has also been beaten, but I do not believe he is seriously injured."

"Great, so we’re back together. Any bright ideas?" 

"I believe your suggested course of action is still valid. We should rest, recuperate and attempt an escape in the morning."

"Make sure Danny doesn’t get cold, Teal’c, you’ll need to share…"

"I will ‘snuggle up’ as you suggest. Goodnight, O’Neill." 

"Goodnight, Teal’c." Jack O’Neill looked down to his chest. Sam’s head rested lightly on him, she was breathing shallowly but steadily. He brushed her hair out of her eyes again, exposing the black and purple eye. "Goodnight, Sam." 

She murmured a reply to him.

"Goodnight, Jim Bob," O’Neill said absentmindedly.

"Colonel O’Neill, you have not yet explained who ‘Jim Bob’ is."

O’Neill smiled. "Walton, Teal’c. Jim Bob Walton."

"Why do you say goodnight to him, when he is not here."

"It’s a TV thing, Teal’c. Like when I called you Lucy that time."

"I still do not understand, O’Neill."

"Another time then, Teal’c. Let’s just get some sleep."

Parker switched to his next box of tricks, radar tracking goggles. The walls were thick. Too thick to blast from the outside without harming the occupants of the cells. But he could still monitor movement of bodies from one place to another. He’d already told Morgan that they couldn’t blast their way in. They had agreed they’d have to go through the doors. Parker shifted his position, it looked like there was no one in the cells on this side of the building and there were no guards.

Croft was still monitoring the movements of guards on the south side. He noticed the movements towards O’Neill’s and Teal’c’s cells and then the guards leaving. Now there were two targets in each cell. 

"Sierra Golf Six-One this is Sierra Golf Six-Four. Packages now together, return to RV point."

Parker acknowledged the message, slipped off his goggles and started back to Croft. 

"That’s some party they’re having," Croft muttered to Parker as he slid into cover beside him. "Bunch of guards put two more in with O’Neill and Teal’c while you were round the other side, look. I couldn’t use the laser cos a couple of guards were wandering about, but there’s definitely two of them there," Croft continued. "Probably Carter with O’Neill. Sounds like they've both been knocked around, they’ve settled down for the night."

Parker scanned the area himself. "Cozy." 

"If it is Carter, can you blame him?"

"Not really. So we got two next door too." Further away he could make out the shades of a couple of people on the other side of the cells. Guards. He scanned the rest of the base of the building and couldn’t see anything else. He weighed up the odds that Carter and Jackson had been returned to O’Neill and Teal’c. He liked them. "Whadda you think, Croft?"

"I think they just put all their eggs in one basket," he smiled.

"Yup, and look the guards are moving away too."

"Party animals, I guess. It’s probably a good time to hit ‘em. Let’s get back to Morgan." The two of them crawled backwards off the brow of the ridge and slipped into the shadows.

Morgan drew a plan in the dirt and the team gathered round for the briefing. It appeared that all but five guards on the main entrance had now joined the growing party upstairs. That made things easier. Only four guards were left outside the target cells.

Everyone had their positions, it was quiet entry and exit.

"Overall," Morgan summed up, "get in, grab our people and get out. Quietly, now, no heroics and no fire-fights. Shoot only when you have to and keep it damn quiet when you do. They’ll be drunk but they can’t be that stupid. Everyone goes home tonight people, that’s what we came here to do." He looked around at his men as they nodded in agreement. "Let’s kick some ass." 

The huddle broke and the men fanned out with expert precision. They advanced through the moonlit night, silently, carefully, purposefully.

They were playing cards, or something like cards anyway. They didn’t see or hear the silenced bullets coming. They fell where they sat. Getting in was easy. The team moved on. Parker went first, leading the way through the dimly lit hallways. 

Outside, Croft was monitoring their progress. "No one in the area," he reported to Parker. "They just went upstairs." 

Morgan halted the team and signaled their next moves. 

Michael "Midge" Clark led half the team in securing the exit. Morgan continued with the rest of the team through the hallways.

_  
_

"O’Neill and Teal’c should be close by. They look like they’re asleep," Croft’s voice in his ear stated softly. _"No sign of hostiles… Stop. The next two are the target."_

Morgan knocked softly on the first door. O’Neill woke up with a start. "Colonel? Teal’c?" a voice whispered. 

O’Neill got up. "Morgan? Is that you?" 

"Hold tight, Colonel, just looking for the keys. You got Major Carter and Jackson in there?" 

"I’ve got Carter, Daniel’s with Teal’c. They’re hurt pretty bad. Who’s with you?"

"Just SG-3 and SG-6 sir, surgical extraction."

The key turned and the door groaned open. Morgan blinded Jack with his flashlight. O’Neill winced. "Sorry, Colonel, you good to go?"

"Anywhere but here… Carter’s got broken ribs and God knows what else." 

Parker helped O’Neill lift Carter and sit her on the edge of the bed. She awoke with a start. A face, blackened and smeared appeared in front of her. "Major Carter?" the face said. 

She squinted. "Oh God." Tears of relief welled up. "Major Parker?"

"Sshhhh," he hissed. "You injured?" 

"Ribs," she nodded. "Hard to breathe."

"Good to go?" 

She nodded vigorously this time. 

Parker dug into his pack, pulling out two heavy camouflage jackets. He tossed one to O’Neill and set about helping Carter into the other one. "Okay, let’s move out." 

Parker helped O’Neill lift the Major to her feet. She winced against the searing pain, but boosted by a surge of adrenaline and hope she managed to plant her feet solidly.

Franson appeared in the doorway with Teal’c, holding Jackson, still unconscious, between them. Teal’c looked pretty good. Jack could feel the crusty scabs on his temples and figured he must look pretty bad. 

Teal’c offered them a rare smile. "It is good to see you all."

"Later," Morgan urged. "We have an escape to make."

Morgan and Midge led their charges out across the open ground and to the trees, ducking for cover between the bushes. The group was moving more slowly towards Croft now. Carter appeared to be struggling to keep up. She and Parker were lagging behind. "Come on, Major," Croft whispered. Someone dropped back to help them along. They sped up and soon crashed into the hollow, breathing heavily. 

Suddenly an alarm sounded in the distance. "Let’s move!" Morgan stated. "NOW". They picked themselves up and started running. They splashed through the river as Morgan signaled Hudson at the Stargate on his radio, all was well and the run in was clear. 

Ponchos started pouring out of the entrance to the enemy building. Their shouts grew louder and echoed across the open ground. Everyone was running now. Teal’c had hoisted Daniel over his shoulder and was getting ahead. O’Neill’s lungs burned from the sudden exertion and cool night air. He was next to Carter now, pulling her along with the tide of marines, Parker at her side. She forced air into her lungs as she stumbled forwards as fast as she could, every breath racked with pain. She was getting dizzy. She could see the gate now. Someone was dialing on the DHD.

The Ponchos flooded across the plain and started up the rise. Morgan and Midge, covering the rear, let rip a blast of machine gun fire into the night sky as the Stargate sputtered into life. The Ponchos scattered. 

Hudson sent the iris code and motioned them forward. SG-3 formed up round the gate and fired high in the air, Morgan and Midge turned and dashed for the gate. They all paused for a few seconds. 

"Go Go Go" Morgan screamed. 

Parker scrambled up the steps and leapt through with O’Neill and Carter in tow. Teal’c followed with Jackson. Moments later the rest of SG-3 and SG-6 collapsed in behind them. Morgan took one quick look round to make sure everyone was through, then he nodded to Midge. They both jumped. 

**  
**

3

The klaxon pulled Hammond from his daydream with a start.

"Incoming traveler!" Sergeant Davis announced.

He rushed down the stairs to the control room. "Who is it?" he barked.

"SG-3 signal, sir. Opening iris."

The huge metal cover slid back from the gate revealing the shimmering event horizon of the wormhole.

Parker tumbled from it first, rolling halfway down the ramp in a controlled fall. "Medics!" he shouted. He leapt back up ready to catch the others. O’Neill came next, cradling Carter against him. They stumbled down the ramp at Parker’s insistence. Teal’c and Franson emerged, Daniel slung between them, then the rest of SG-3 and SG-6 poured through, tumbling over one another.

"Close the iris!" Morgan ordered as he came through. It hissed closed. The wormhole disengaged and the embarkation room fell momentarily silent.

Teal’c deposited the limp body of Daniel Jackson on a trolley which disappeared, Dr Fraiser at his side. Franson went with them.

Across the room, Carter coughed and cried out. Jack lifted up her head, she was frothing at the mouth, rich bright red blood. Crying, she doubled over and collapsed in a heap, covering him with her blood as she continued coughing. He’d led her to the side out of way of the incoming soldiers. "Over here!" he called out to another medical team entering the room. "It’s all right, Carter. It’s all right. You’re gonna be just fine. We’re home now." She shuddered, more blood came up. "Medic!" he shouted again, and they were there. "It’s all right, Sam."

"Help me…" she gasped, "Please…" She screamed as someone tried to move her to the gurney. She started to fight, then the pain welled up and she was washed away. 

Teal’c now leant over Carter, scooped her up in his arms, and set her down gently on the gurney. The medics rushed out of the room with O’Neill and Teal’c close behind.

"Colonel Morgan!" Hammond barked through the intercom.

Morgan looked up and saluted. "SG-1, 3 and 6 all present, sir!"

Hammond returned the salute. "See to your men, Colonel. We’ll de-brief in 20 minutes!"

"Yes sir!"

"Everyone in one piece?" Several of SG-3 rolled out from the pile on the ramp. "SIR, YES SIR!" they barked in unison. 

"Okay, everyone head for the infirmary. Normal post-gate protocols."

"Sir, yes sir" they picked themselves up and moved, chattering softly, en masse to the infirmary.

Fraiser hadn’t seen the state of Sam when she came through the gate. Teal’c had handed Daniel to her, unconscious. She rushed back to the infirmary at his bedside barking orders for IV’s and monitors. Warner was waiting for her. "How many Doctor?" 

"I don’t know, SG-3 looked okay." She turned to the marine who had accompanied Daniel through the gate. "Franson?" 

"Ma’am, sir. No injuries were sustained by SG-3 or SG-6. We found Dr Jackson unconscious and Major Carter didn’t look too great but she was mobile. I think Colonel O’Neill was beaten up too. Teal’c looked okay."

"Thank you, Captain," Warner said. "Can you wait over there and keep the rest of your teams out of the way for a while. Someone will check you out as soon as we can."

"Yes sir." Franson wandered out of the way and sat down on the edge of a cot. He watched silently as the medics buzzed over their patient like honey bees.

She jumped back into consciousness in the elevator. The stark light burned at her eyes and she doubled up and cried out. Teal’c and O’Neill tried to hold her down to stop her rolling off the gurney. She struggled against them, kicking and screaming with a ferocity O’Neill didn’t think she possessed. One kick landed Teal’c straight in the stomach. He stumbled back against the wall. "NOOOO," she was crying, "LEAVE ME ALONE!"

"Jesus, Major, calm down!" O’Neill tried to calm her, holding down her arms, another man held her legs.

"DON’T TOUCH ME!" she was kicking again, "LEAVE ME ALONE!"

"MAJOR STAND DOWN!" He shook her arms.

She blinked and swallowed.

"Sam, it’s okay, it’s me, Jack. We’re not gonna hurt you, Carter, we’re trying to help you."

Tears blurred her vision. Through them she could just about recognize the face that went with the voice. "Colonel O’Neill?"

"Yeah, Carter, it’s me. Teal’c’s here too. You’re safe now. We’re back in the SGC."

She sniffed and blinked then rubbed at her good eye. She looked up at Jack and then at Teal’c. Her vision blurred in and out. "Teal’c?" She tried to focus. It didn’t matter, she could feel his presence close by.

"Yes, Major Carter. You have nothing to fear from us."

"Home?" she whispered.

"Yeah, Carter, we’re home again. Doc Fraiser’s gonna take real good care of you and you’re gonna be fine."

The doors opened startling her again, she edged backwards away from the crowd at the elevator door. Jack waved his hand in front of her eyes to get her attention back on him. She flinched, expecting a blow. "It’s okay, Sam, just the infirmary." He started to inch the gurney forward out of the elevator. Her eyes darted maniacally around the room.

"Please clear this area," Teal’c intoned. An orderly motioned them over to a spare cot. "We require to see Dr Fraiser. Immediately." 

"Yessir." He skittered away.

"It’s okay, Carter, we’re home now." O'Neill repeated softly as he helped move her to the edge of the bed.

Her breathing slowed, she closed her eyes and rocked back and forth for a moment, her arms wrapped around her body "Daniel." She said finally. "Where’s Daniel? You didn’t leave him there did you?"

"No, no one got left behind, Sam, everyone came back. It’s okay. Danny’s with the Doc now."

"He okay?" 

"He’ll be fine, Carter. We’re all gonna be fine." He gently held her hand, she covered it with her own and held on.

Fraiser took one look at her new patient and whispered a few orders to the orderly. Then she slowly approached the head of the bed.

"Hello, Sam," she said quietly.

Sam looked up and recognized her friend. "Janet?"

"Yeah, is it okay if I come closer?"

Sam nodded but hadn’t released her grip on the Colonel.

"Sam, I want to help you." Fraiser began. Sam coughed a spluttering, guttural cough. "You’re hurt, Sam. I want to help you. Will you let me do that?"

She sniffed again and nodded slowly. Fraiser took her friend’s hand in hers. "Okay, Colonel, could you step out for a minute, Sam and I need some time."

Sam’s head snapped back up to the colonel’s gaze. "It’s okay, Carter, I’ll be right outside. You just call if you want me." Slowly she released her grip and O’Neill carefully backed away. Someone drew the curtain across, blocking his view of her. Then he could hear Fraiser talking slowly and softly.

Teal’c and another medic steered O’Neill to the next cot. "Colonel, is this blood yours?" 

Jack looked down. "No," he managed, "only the dried stuff. Jesus, Teal’c, what the hell did they do to her?"

"I do not know, O’Neill. I have never known Major Carter to conduct herself in such a manner." He rested his hand on his stomach.

"Junior okay?"

"My symbiont and I were not expecting such a blow, but we will recover."

"This will help with the pain, Sam," Fraiser unsheathed the needle. It was in her arm and out again before she had time to react. The effect was immediate. A tide of peace and painlessness swept over her. She relaxed.

"Is that better, Sam?" Fraiser was saying. She nodded. "Can I take a look at you now?" She nodded again.

Janet carefully undid the blood soaked jacket and cut away her t-shirt. Underneath Sam Carter was several shades of black and blue. Without touching her, Janet could see at least one badly misshapen rib. It had probably punctured her lung. She steadied herself with a deep breath and continued in soft reassuring tones. 

"Cold," Carter moaned softly.

"Are you cold, Sam?"

"Mmmn."

"Here," Fraiser lifted up the sheet to cover her. She turned to the nurse beside her. "Set up for some X-rays; head, c-spine and chest. We’ll have to see what we can get without moving her too much." 

"Ma’am."

"And, Jason, you’d better tell Dr Warner we’re gonna have to prep for surgery."

The nurse nodded and left quickly.

"It’s okay," Fraiser continued softly, "nothing to worry about. We’ll knock you out and get you fixed up. Okay?"

Sam nodded, her eyes thanking the Doctor. "Hurts," she moaned again.

"I know, just a few minutes, okay? Maxine will stay with you until I get back."

She nodded.

"Doctor," Rayner started, "SG Three and Six have reported for post-gate, ma’am."

Fraiser glanced from the chart she was making notes in. Around twenty Marines and Airmen stood in a tight knot. They’d removed their weapons and gear but their faces were still smeared with camouflage paint.

"I need to scrub in, are any of them injured?"

"No, ma’am, just need post-gate."

"Well, have them wash up and come back in an hour. Be ready for them when they get back."

"Yes, ma’am."

Fraiser surveyed her domain, deep under the mountain. She watched the men drift reluctantly away. They just wanted to be near. She thought about calling MacKenzie. It could wait. She had other work to do. She pushed those thoughts from her mind and headed for Pre-Op.

**  
**

4

"Colonel O’Neill?"

"Doc."

Fraiser examined his chart critically. Moderate to severe bruising, no fractures, no sign of concussion. "How are you feeling?"

O’Neill stretched his arms out in front of him, and took a deep breath. "Stiff. A little tired."

"That’s not surprising, Colonel, you’ve had quite a trip."

"Danny and Carter?"

"Doctor Jackson has a concussion, some bumps and bruises but nothing serious. He’s gonna have a great headache when he wakes up but he should be fine."

"Carter?"

Fraiser hugged her clipboard. "She’s in the ICU. She has a couple of cracked ribs on the left side and one more serious fracture on the right."

"How bad?"

"It happened yesterday, she’d been in a lot of pain for over a day and she was almost exhausted." O’Neill stared ahead trying to absorb the information. He’d been there himself in Antarctica, he knew how much broken ribs hurt. Fraiser was still talking, "You should know we’ve put her on a ventilator."

His head snapped round. "A _ventilator_ , you mean she can’t breathe?"

"No, no, no," she soothed, "she _is_ breathing on her own, the ventilator is just helping her." Jack did not look convinced. "Let me explain. One of the ribs is broken in two places and it’s moving around. As you breathe in your chest expands, your ribs move out and pull the air in. Sam’s broken rib is moving the wrong way. She wasn’t getting enough air in her lungs. The ventilator recognizes when she’s trying to breathe in and forces in some extra air to inflate the lungs properly. The rib is pushed out with the rest of the ribcage. Sam makes the effort and the ventilator does the work for her. Okay?"

"Right." O’Neill rubbed his eyes with the palms of his hands. "Can I see her?"

"Not right now, she’s sedated. Why don’t we see about getting you some rest and you can go see her in the morning." Fraiser smiled and gripped his hand gently. 

"What time is it anyway?" 

Fraiser checked her watch. "Twenty three hundred hours, Colonel, Tuesday. Did you get much sleep off planet?"

"A little." His mind was wandering again.

"Well, I’ll give you something to help."

"Okay," he muttered distantly.

Fraiser nodded to a nurse who handed her the syringe. "There," she said, "now you just settle down and we’ll talk in the morning." Fraiser adjusted the older man’s pillows and covers. Slowly his eyes bobbed and he slipped into a deep sleep.

Fraiser finished talking to General Hammond and stifled a yawn. She’d been up for too long herself. It had been a hard day. Cassandra’s birthday wasn’t supposed to end like this. But then, at least she could tell the girl that her friends were back on Earth. And alive. Fraiser checked the last couple of things on SG-1’s charts and left via the ICU. Sam was stable and breathing steadily. The ventilator hissed with the ebb and flow of air. It was a restful sound, like waves crashing on a beach. She held Carter’s hand for a few moments and left, smiling at Teal’c who had planted himself in the corner of his friend's room. "She’ll be fine, Teal’c. You should get some rest yourself."

"I will remain," he said stony faced. "Should Major Carter awaken, she may require reassurance."

"Okay, Teal’c, I’ll see you in the morning." She left glancing back momentarily to her charges. _They’ll be just fine…_

* * * * *

Up top the sun was shining brightly in the sky. It was a fresh summer day. In the mountain it was the regular comfortable 70 degrees but down in the infirmary there was no sunlight to brighten the day.

Colonel O’Neill was sitting in a chair at Carter’s side. He looked terrible. His face was now turning black and purple, his eyes were sunken and withdrawn. 

"Good morning, Colonel, Teal’c, and how are we this morning?"

"I am well, Doctor Fraiser," Teal’c supplied. "Colonel O’Neill has just joined us."

"Colonel?"

"Uh?" Jack looked up for the first time. "Sorry, Doc, what did you say?"

Fraiser busied herself with ’Carter’s charts and adjusted a few knobs on the machines. "I asked how you were."

"Oh, I’m okay," he said distantly, "how ‘bout Carter?"

"Resting comfortably. Her sats are up."

O’Neill’s eyebrows rose in question. "That’s good isn’t it?"

"Yes, Colonel, it is."

"Good…" his mind wandered and his voice trailed off. His eyes bobbing shut sleepily.

Fraiser put her hand gently on his shoulder. "Why don’t you go back to bed, Colonel. Major Carter will be asleep for a while yet. You can come back later."

"No, I should be here when she wakes up."

"Colonel, you need to rest. Teal’c can stay. Now don’t make me order you."

"But..."

"Please, Jack…"

"I will remain here, O’Neill. I will inform you as soon as Major Carter awakens."

"Okay." He let Fraiser lead him away as she quietly reminded herself to up his dose of sedative next time. 

Teal’c sat down beside Carter and closed his eyes to meditate.

Daniel Jackson had been restless for some time. His sheets were becoming soaked with sweat and he tossed and turned. Soon, his mumbling grew louder. Teal’c moved to his side and shook him awake with a start. "SAM!" he exclaimed, sitting bolt upright. He ducked back again as a searing pain lanced through his head. "Ow!"

"It is all right Daniel Jackson, we have been rescued." Teal’c handed Daniel his spare glasses. 

Daniel put them on and everything slid into focus. "But, Teal’c, where’s Sam, they took her away."

"And delivered her to Colonel O’Neill’s cell, shortly before yourself. We were later rescued by SG-3 and 6."

"Teal’c, she was hurt really bad."

"As were you, Daniel Jackson."

Jackson rubbed at his head and ribs, they were sore. "I guess…" He scanned the immediate area and spotted Colonel O’Neill in the next bed but he couldn’t see her. "Where is she?"

"Major Carter is in intensive care, she will survive, as will we all."

"Hello there Doctor Jackson, good to have you back with us." Dr Warner’s bright and cheery voice cut through the quiet. "How are you feeling?"

"How’s Sam?"

"She’s next door, she has rib fractures, we’re helping her with breathing, but she should be fine."

"Can I see her?"

"Let’s check you out first. Can’t have you keeling over on us."

Warner asked him some questions about the date, where he was and his name. He shone a light in his eyes and made a few notes. "I’ll get a chair and you can sit with her for a few minutes."

"Okay."

* * * * *

Martouf stepped through the shimmering gate alone.

"Martouf," General Hammond greeted him solemnly.

"General Hammond."

"I was hoping that Jacob would respond personally to my message," Hammond stated.

"My apologies, General, but Jacob and Selmak are away and cannot be contacted. I asked the High Council to attend in thier place. Perhaps I can be of assistance?"

Martouf looked around the gate room. There were a lot of unhappy faces, and no one from SG-1 had come to greet him. "Is SG-1 off world?" he asked.

"No, Martouf. Please come with me, I’ll explain on the way."

Martouf entered the infirmary and halted as he caught sight of Carter. She was surrounded by machines and looked deathly pale against the blackening bruises. Dr Fraiser was talking to him, explaining what was wrong. 

"I am sorry, Doctor," he interrupted. "I am able to help heal her injuries, do you have the healing device?"

"We do," Hammond nodded to an airman who scuttled away to fetch it.

Martouf approached the bed and gently cradled Sam’s face in his hands. "It will not be long, Samantha," he whispered. Her eyes blinked open. Martouf’s face slid into focus. "Do not try to talk," he said.

Her face screwed up and a single tear dribbled down her cheek. The ventilators alarm went off. "Don’t fight it, Sam," Fraiser ordered, "just breathe slow and easy." Sam lifted her hand up to the tube down her throat. "Leave it alone, Sam." Fraiser moved her hand away.

The airman re-appeared clutching the device and Martouf slipped it on. "You may remove the tube, Doctor, she will not need it."

Fraiser looked skeptical, but agreed, She had seen that gadget work in the past. Sam was going to be in a lot of pain for weeks. It was worth a try. "Okay, Sam, I’m going to take this out, I need you to take a deep breath in and when I say, breathe out and cough, okay?"

Sam nodded. 

"Okay," Fraiser disconnected the tube from the ventilator, "Okay, in and breathe out."

Carter coughed as Fraiser pulled the tube out, she held her chest and winced against the pain.

"Lie still, Samantha." Martouf placed a soothing hand on one shoulder and moved her hands to her sides. "It will be uncomfortable for a few moments, are you ready?"

She nodded. Martouf held his hand over her chest and channeled energy into the device nestled in his palm. Orange light flowed from it making her chest glow. She inhaled deeply and held the breath as he continued. He moved the beam over her chest, pausing over the fractures. Then the light was gone. She exhaled and her chest began to rise and fall softly and noiselessly. Her pained expression disappeared and her eyes flickered shut. "Thank you," she whispered. 

"Rest now, Samantha." Martouf looked up to Fraiser, "I can do more, however she requires to rest first. I am sorry I did not come sooner."

"How long will Jacob be away?"

"We do not know. They have infiltrated a System Lord’s court. It is too dangerous to attempt to contact them. It may be some time before they contact the Tok’ra. I will report to the High Council and then return. Please, can you supply the coordinates of this world, so that we may avoid it also."

"Of course, we’ll give you the details."

"Doctor," Martouf continued, "she should not be in pain, however she will be greatly fatigued. I will return in a few hours to complete the treatment. Do the others require attention?"

"I think they’ll be just fine, but you’re welcome to try."

They were not as badly injured and the treatments took seconds. Neither man awoke from their sedated states. Fraiser thanked Martouf and he left quickly.

True to his word he returned within hours and asked to be taken directly to Carter. She was lying on her back, her breathing shallow but steady. He began without waking her, sweeping the orange light over her torso and then down over the rest of her body. He paused in several places, channeling the healing power where it was needed. When he was finished he sat silently with her and waited.

It wasn’t long before her eyes flickered open. "Samantha," he said, sadness clearly in his eyes, "you had many internal injuries. I have done my best."

"Thank you," she managed weakly. "Dad?"

"Samantha, I am sorry I could not bring your father to you. It is too dangerous to contact him, but I will bring him to you as soon as I can. Until then, you must rest."

She nodded sleepily and closed her eyes again drifting into a painless, exhausted sleep.

**  
**

5

The monthly medical review had meandered for most of the morning. Finally there was only one more thing for Doctor Fraiser and General Hammond to discuss.

"SG-1," he sighed.

"Teal’c is fit and ready. Daniel needs a little more time." He was still taking sleeping tablets.

"Carter?"

"Sir, Carter is due to leave the infirmary today, she wants to stay on base in case her father arrives."

"Understandable. How is she?"

"Still quite tired, it’s the only side effect that the healing device seems to have. Physically her injuries have healed. She’s lost a little weight but I don’t think it will take her long to build it back up. She needs to rest for a while."

"How about up here?" Hammond tapped his temple.

Fraiser hesitated, "I’ve offered to set up some appointments with MacKenzie but she flatly refused. I’ve also offered her counseling, she says she’s fine. It was one of those things. Turn the page. Forget it." 

"Do they need counseling?" 

Janet shrugged. "Sir, they have all coped before, following trauma like this. I don’t want to force any of them into a situation they are uncomfortable with. They have to want to talk. More than anything they need to talk to each other. And they are. I don’t know what Major Carter said to Daniel last week, but he’s perked up no end."

"Colonel O’Neill?" Hammond asked.

"Still smarting. He and Carter haven’t been around each other much."

"Avoiding each other?" General Hammond asked.

"Possibly. But Major Carter has been sleeping a lot."

"They’ve all completed their mission reports." Hammond continued, flipping open a folder on his desk. "Carter’s is quite…"

"Brief." Fraiser supplied. "She did it last week sir, she was still pretty tired. Do you want her to expand it?"

"No. It’s sufficient for the record," He closed the folder again, "I can’t help thinking..."

"Sir?"

"Doctor Jackson’s assessment of this culture. None of the male SG-1 members saw a native woman whilst they were there. Where were they?"

"Many cultures segregate their women, especially in combat situations. Maybe it was an army barracks?"

"Carter, as far as we know, was the only female on that planet. Doesn’t that worry you, Doctor?"

She knew where he was going. She’d had that thought herself. Her initial examination had turned up so much bruising over Carter’s whole body she couldn’t be sure of anything. When they were alone she had asked her directly if there was anything else she wanted to tell her. Sam had said no. That was everything. Without evidence to the contrary, she hadn’t dared push the woman any further.

"I have no evidence to support a hypothesis that anything else happened, General. Major Carter has been quite supportive of her team-mates since they returned. Despite her obvious exhaustion, she appears to be recovering well." Hammond nodded. "However, we’ve not really been demanding anything from her these last two weeks, mostly she’s been sleeping in the infirmary. I’ll keep an eye out for any change when she leaves."

"You do that, Doctor, I need SG-1 back in the loop as soon as possible."

"General, we’re not looking at a quick solution here. They might need a few weeks and some time off before they’re ready for off-world duty again."

Hammond looked disappointed, but not surprised. "Being cooped up here might suit Dr. Jackson and Carter, but you know O’Neill and Teal’c."

"Yes sir, I do."

"Thank you, Doctor." Hammond dismissed her. He flipped open the reports folder and read it again. It didn’t make him feel any better.

* * * * *

It had been her home for two weeks, mostly she had slept and people had stopped by and left, some without her waking, only Teal’c marking their comings and goings and filling her in. It was time to move out. Move on. As she collected up the few possessions that had made their way here from her quarters she silently considered what she would do now. 

They had mentioned nasty stuff in basic, but nothing in training could prepare you for when it happened. When it happened to you. They couldn’t realistically prepare anyone for the stuff that had happened to her, not just recently but over the last four years. Torture was such a general term. She had been captured and tortured several times since stepping through the gate that first, wondrous time. Some methods had been much more subtle than others. But she had always coped, even with the invasion of her mind. She got past that and she could get past this. 

The whole Jolinar experience had taught her a lot about herself and her team-mates. They hurt as she hurt. They had suffered with her as she struggled to make sense of it. Now that all seemed to be working out nicely. Saving Dad’s life, the alliance with the Tok’ra. But she couldn’t see how one ounce of good could ever come from the events on P4T3DY. No good at all. And she wasn’t the only one in pain anyway.

Daniel had been inconsolable. He felt guilty about not figuring out the language in time, or at all. He’d been avoiding her, tending to leave just as she was waking up and not returning until she was asleep again. That had hurt more than anything. So she had started with Daniel. She couldn’t bear the thought of him beating himself up over it anymore so she asked to see him. Teal’c had to frog-march him to her bedside where she locked her own pain tightly away and gave him the pep talk of the century. 

It had worked. Daniel had started stopping by and chatting to her, even reading the newspaper to her when she was tired, keeping her up to date on the SGC grapevine. Just like she did when he was sick. But that was last week and technically, she wasn’t sick anymore. So it was time to go home and rest. 

Home, however, wasn’t an attractive option. She felt safe down here, surrounded by her friends and plenty of armed guards. Nope, her quarters would do just fine for now, scratchy blankets, no windows and all. _I can do this,_ she told herself over and over. _They don’t need to know. I’ve been keeping secrets all my life and this is no different. Stay on the base and wait for Dad, then figure out the rest._

Daniel was really sweet. He took her home to collect a few things and then came back to the SGC. She kept bumping into him in the corridors until she realized he was probably following her, and deliberately doing it.

The first night on her own didn’t go well. Invaded by hideous nightmares she awoke in the early hours overcome with nausea. Crying herself back to sleep she was restless and awoke drained and hungry. Instinctively she headed to the commissary for breakfast. She didn’t make it. The smell of bacon cooking wafted down the corridor as she approached. Images flashed ferociously through her mind’s eye, causing her head to spin and her stomach to churn. She fled back to the astrophysics lab, her appetite crushed. Numbly she tried to occupy her mind with other things and tried to look busy.

Fraiser said she should get more fresh air, so she started going up top to the mountain for walks. Long, lonely walks that usually ended in her sitting under the trees alone with her thoughts, nightmares and tears.

Sam Carter was definitely not herself. She was quiet and slightly withdrawn. Only Daniel seemed to be able to get more than a few sentences out of her. Even then, she hardly smiled. It was summer and Fraiser brought Cassie into work with her, but even _she_ couldn’t bring Sam out of the depths for long. Sam never seemed to go to the break room or commissary to eat. Fraiser wasn’t sure what she was eating but when she did catch up with her, Sam assured her she was eating okay. Daniel had other ideas.

It started with a missed ‘date’ with SG-1. She’d made an excuse that she was tired and going to bed. O’Neill and Teal’c had started to protest, but Daniel let her go. He stopped by to pick her up for breakfast but she wasn’t there. He finally caught up with her around lunch time. He didn’t bother asking her to join them, just placed a lunch bag on the lab bench in front of her, and gave her a half smile. "I know you’re busy," he started, "I thought you might like some company while you eat." He opened the second bag containing his own lunch. "Come on," he said, "just a few minutes then I’ll leave you alone. Please?"

Hesitantly she opened the bag. She’d been living off a Daniel diet of coffee and candy bars, and here he was feeding her good wholesome food. The irony of it wasn’t lost on her. 

She picked at the food at first, a tuna sandwich, an apple, a candy bar, juice and a piece of chocolate brownie. Well that was wholesome for Daniel and it was very welcome. It was the first decent thing she’d eaten in nearly two days. She watched him watch her eat. He was onto her. The cracks were obviously starting to show and she couldn’t keep up the act that everything was okay. She had to get away from everyone for a while. 

She went home.

* * * * *

They wouldn’t go away. None of them.

They were everywhere she was, everywhere she wanted to go, wanted to be.

The smells that forced images and pain into her body like daggers. The images that made her sick to her stomach and hate herself. The pain, deep inside her, all over her.

She awoke gasping and retching. She made it to the bathroom, just, and spilled her meager dinner into the bowl. When she was done she sat back against the bath and rubbed her flushed face. Twisting round she turned on the faucets and splashed cold water on her face, then sank back against the bath and drew her knees up close.

The tears came again, as they stood over her, she pulled her knees closer to her body her hands laced protectively over her head.

_  
_

Go away! her mind screamed.

"GO AWAY!"

Shouting it out loud didn’t seem to help. She shivered and dissolved into tears.

Somewhere something stirred within her, as her conscious mind tried to shut out the world and turned inwards, in on itself to the one that could be relied on, herself. But she wasn’t alone and there were other memories pushed forward. _From despair can come joy…_

They had quite literally saved the world, but at a cost she didn’t think she could live with, he was gone, her friend. It was like losing a brother. He was so sweet, how could she cope without his smile to brighten her day. Without him, the colonel would have no one to argue with in that not always good natured way they had. The gathered SGC personnel erupted in applause as they entered the room, it was a bittersweet pill that she desperately wanted to swallow. They almost hadn’t made it themselves. She needed not to be here, she needed to think about this, and she needed to grieve for him. Probably on her own. She had to come to terms with it herself before she could help the others, before she could help Jack. Jack had left him behind and she had let him do it.

General Hammond was saying something now, but she couldn’t help thinking how incomplete she felt standing next to her team-mates. It wasn’t registering as Bra’tac was led away. The crowd had parted to let him go then reformed seamlessly. She looked from one familiar face to another, getting smiles and nods of recognition. _But we left him, guys, don’t you get that. He’s not coming back, he’s gone._

Her head drooped and she couldn’t understand why but Hammond was smiling at her. _You don’t get it…_

They moved, just a little, just enough. From between the green uniforms and serious military haircuts his blond hair flopped in front of his eyes, he pushed it back and squeezed into the space in front of the ramp. Jack was moving forward now, a broad smile spreading across his face, his arms uncharacteristically spread out to grasp the man in a bear hug.

"Daniel!" The joy overflowed and she moved forward to hug him herself. But as Jack released him his face changed. The blond hair was now dark and short, his blue eyes were a hard, dark brown and his middle aged face was grinning at her. It was him again.

"NOO!" She screamed so loud she woke herself from the nightmare and slumped back on the floor of her bathroom, holding her head in her hands. She pushed the image of her tormentor away. _No, Daniel didn’t do that, Daniel didn’t hurt me. It was him, them. Get a grip Carter, you’re going nuts. Daniel’s your friend…_

Slowly she regained control, her breathing slowed and everything started to make sense again. The floor was hard. She hoisted herself up using the edge of the bath. Resting wearily on its rim she ran her hands through her sweat soaked hair. It was light out and the sun was starting to stream through the frosted glass window. She wasn’t wearing her watch again. Knowing the time was depressing. Knowing she hadn’t slept properly in days was depressing. She wasn’t even sure what day it was, and really didn’t care.

Her mouth felt like it had been stuffed with cotton for a week. She twisted round to the sink and caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror. The dark circles under haunted, bloodshot eyes, her skin pale from too many days underground and inside. This wasn’t working. She splashed water on her face and brushed her teeth slowly, scrubbing out the taste from last night. Trying to make herself clean again. Then she padded back into her bedroom and slumped on the edge of the bed. She was alone. So very alone. Even her own father had abandoned her. Where was he, why didn’t he come, she needed him so much.

The desperation grew. It was in her backpack, the one the colonel had bought her for her birthday last year. Kept promising her that SG-1 would go on a camping trip on Earth some day. Just for the fun of it. Roasting marshmallows and not worrying who might creep up on them, not an MRE insight. They hadn’t got round to it. 

She pulled the bag onto the bed beside her and tipped the contents onto the coverlet. The quilt her mom had given her for her 13th birthday, a teenager, her little girl all grown up. She’d had to grow up quickly when her mom was killed.

The black pouch landed heavily on the soft materials, nestling into the folds of plaid fabric. She fingered the press stud holding it closed, and turned the object over in her hands. It seemed to have _WAY OUT_ plastered over it in large friendly letters. 

She pulled the stud open, and eased out the metal from its sheath. The slide slipped back easily under her grasp. It was loaded, like it always was. Deftly she pulled the slide back again and ejected the magazine, automatically she checked the barrel and in seconds it was in pieces in front of her. Part of her didn’t think it was a good idea to be home without it all together, part of her wanted it in pieces, didn’t she trust herself? She wasn’t sure. A car sped past her window and screeched round the corner. She shuddered and cursed for staying here at all. The colonel and Daniel were right, this wasn’t a great part of town anymore. 

Deftly without much of a thought the gun was back together again, she turned it over in her hands... thinking... what if? The way out sign seemed to have faded and in its place was the word _peace_. Strange thing to seem to appear on a gun but there it was and for some reason _peace_ sounded pretty good right now. Peace from nightmares, peace from the nagging pains in her stomach every time she went near food cooking. Every time someone stood too close to her in the line or brushed past her in the corridor. Only Jack, Daniel and Teal’c could stand that close without her flinching, and only if she knew they were there in the first place. Insecurity didn’t describe it. Paranoia got closer. Mostly it was dread. 

Who would care? Who would find her? Jack. She couldn’t bear the thought of him having to find her. Especially like that. It would destroy him completely. She didn’t want to hurt any of them, that’s why she was doing this. To protect them. 

She was still turning it over in her hands, she didn’t feel safe here. Didn’t even feel safe in her own place. She had to get out, go somewhere else and be safe. Go somewhere and not be alone. Go somewhere where people thought they understood why she was unhappy, even if they couldn’t help. She could just be safe.

Pulling on her clothes and shoving everything back into her back-pack she headed for the door. She paused and pulled the gun from the pack. Removing it from the pouch, she nestled it in the back of her jeans. She checked the peephole and after taking a quick glance around the apartment, headed out. 

Her car started first time, a miracle, and she was soon heading on automatic pilot out to the base. The radio was on and the morning news was droning about the threat from a middle eastern fundamentalist group she hadn’t even heard of. 

The world had no idea, and for the first time, in a long time, she wanted to tell them. She wanted to tell them everything, just so someone might understand why she wanted to stay so much and why it was so hard for it to be that way. 

Her eyes blurred as the cool rushing air dried the forming tears. She rubbed them with the back of her hand. As she stopped at a light, she caught a glimpse of herself in the rear view mirror. She looked a mess and for some reason it didn’t immediately occur to her that there was anything wrong with that, except, that wasn’t how she did things. That wasn’t the ultra-efficient Sam Carter and she had to keep up that front for their sakes. She pulled into a gas station and availed herself of its facilities, wetting down her hair and combing it into place. It would do until she could get to the locker room and shower. It would do until she was somewhere safer than here or her place. 

The colonel had talked to her before, about getting a new apartment. She hadn’t had time to look or time to think about moving before, maybe now would be a good time. A good time to move on.

Pulling up to the front gate the guard greeted her by name, everyone on the base knew Carter. There weren’t that many women assigned here so it was easy for all the women to know each other, but all the guys just made it their business to know her by name. She didn’t stand a hope in hell of knowing all of them, but she did a pretty good job with the SGC guys. Some were more attentive than others. She handled it professionally and just got on with things. 

That hadn’t been so easy recently, especially with Simmonds. He was starting to get on her nerves. He always seemed to be around when she was trying to get a little job done, something that she could handle without thinking too much. That wasn’t going to put anyone in danger if she screwed it up… those little jobs, the notes, the experiments. People would leave her alone if she looked busy. Even if she did stop and stare into space for minutes on end when no one was looking. It didn’t matter, it was getting by. 

Everything would be okay when Dad came. She knew he would just hold her and tell her everything was going to be all right and she’d believe him and it would be. And the colonel would stop avoiding her gaze, and asking her if she was all right. She hated lying to him, but she always said yes, she was fine. Just tired. And Daniel, how he was always nearby and smiling at her, trying to cheer her up when she didn’t want to be happy, she had no right to be happy about any of this. They wouldn’t understand. They would get angry and that would fall on her. They would hate her for what she had done and she couldn’t stand the thought of them finding out. She was strong, and she could do this. The nightmares would fade and she would be able to sleep soon. _Soon, I just have to tough this out for a while longer…_

She parked her car and headed down to the entrance. Planting her best and brightest smile across her face she passed through the security checkpoint and headed into the bowels of the mountain. 

The bright sun’s rays didn’t penetrate here and the familiar whir of the air-conditioning system filled her ears. That constant noise was comforting. The lift sped downwards, she changed lifts then went the rest of the way to the SGC. Her face was sullen until the doors opened, then the smile was back on her face as she headed for the locker room. Despite greeting several people on the way the smile never managed to make it to her eyes. They stayed dark and troubled. 

She slid into the relative privacy of SG1’s locker room, pulled the door closed and checked it was empty before locking herself inside. 

All their stuff was hanging up in the cubby-holes, her favorite green jacket, the webbing, her cap. She pulled at the jacket and spread it over her lap. Wondering aimlessly that if it hadn’t got Daniel’s blood over it the day before they shipped out to Poncholand, she would have been wearing it, not the stiff new one that had appeared with her stuff that morning. She fingered the collar of her old friend, it was starting to fray. She’d have to fix that before someone decided it was beyond repair and replaced it with another one. 

Her eyes drifted to her friends’ lockers, their gear had been hanging here for weeks. Unused. Held back on this world because of her. Because she wasn’t ready.

They had talked about it soon after they got back. The colonel had called them all to Sam’s bedside and explained that they would be standing down for a while. Until she got better. 

Daniel was going to catch up on all those artifacts he and Nyan had been hoarding and he and Teal’c were going to… He’d never actually explained what it was they were going to do. Teal’c would probably be reading or helping Daniel. Maybe the colonel was clearing his paperwork backlog. He had to have one, he always had one. Harriman was always pushing him for bits of paper about this or that. It made her wonder if she wanted to make colonel or second in command on a base like this. Too much personnel stuff and not enough science for her liking. But even the science didn’t seem to cut it any more.

She wanted to be with her friends and she wanted to be left alone.

She wanted to be here where it was safe and she wanted to be far away across the galaxy.

She didn’t know what she wanted anymore and it was starting to scare her. 

Everything was starting to scare her.

Her stomach rumbled with hunger, her instinct to go to the commissary for breakfast was overwhelmed by a feeling of impending nausea. Instead she reached into her pack and pulled out one of the score of candy bars she’d bought at the gas station. She opened the wrapper and forced herself to eat it. _Now shut up,_ she told her stomach.

She stashed a couple of bars in her locker and took a long hot shower. Then she dressed in her blue uniform pants and shirt, dried off her hair and combed it neatly into place. She checked her costume, and feeling ready to face her audience unlocked the door and headed out into the drab corridors, not really sure where she was heading. 

* * * * *

"Hey, you’re back," Daniel greeted her, not noticing how she jumped at the sudden intrusion.

"Yeah," she said, "trying to catch up."

Daniel nodded. "Hey, you wanna go get something to eat?"

"I ate already, thanks."

"Okay, how about we have dinner later?"

_  
_

Just go away, Danny, please? "Sure," she found herself saying. Daniel left. Before one of the others caught up with her she headed up top for a walk. Maybe making herself tired would help her sleep. 

It was a long walk, but on returning to her quarters for a nap she couldn’t sleep. Bowing to the inevitable she went back to the lab and started reviewing MALP data.

Daniel bustled in at 7:30 sharp. "Hey," he said, "you ready to go?"

"No, Daniel, I can’t right now."

"Why?" he asked innocently.

_  
_

Because it makes me feel sick, because I hate myself and I don’t want you to get hurt.

"I’ve got three weeks of MALP data to get through, I’m too busy," she snapped.

"Someone else can do it Sam."

"Why? You think I’m not up to it. Dammit Daniel I’m fine. Will you guys just stop harassing me all the time?"

Daniel sensed he had crossed a line. He spread his arms and backed away from her. "Hey, I’m sorry Sam, I was just saying…"

"You were saying that I can’t do my job." She threw the book in her hand down on the bench, making Daniel jump.

"No," he said carefully, "I was just…"

"You were just leaving."

Daniel eyed her for a split second, her eyes were burning with anger. "I was just leaving," he agreed. He backed away. When he was out of reach, he turned and headed for Jack’s office. This was getting stupid.

* * * * *

"Daniel said you had a little disagreement."

"He’s overreacting, it was nothing."

O’Neill raised his eyebrows. "He’s pretty upset you know. Didn’t sound like nothing."

"It was nothing. Now am I the only one trying to get some work done around here?"

"Carter," he started.

"Yes sir!" she spat.

"Major, just get a grip. Whatever you said to Daniel is…"

"Is, with respect, sir, none of your business." She turned and left, leaving O’Neill in her lab, open-mouthed.

"I didn’t say dismissed," he muttered to thin air.

She went to her quarters, grabbed a jacket and headed up top. She emerged into the light and took a deep breath of the fresh mountain air.

"Evening, ma’am."

"Hi, Belland?" She came up so often she knew all the sentries by name.

"Nice evening for a walk," he added, rummaging in the guard post and pulling out a map of the mountain.

"Yeah," she said. "Number three, I think."

"Gonna get dark in an hour, ma’am. You wanna borrow a flashlight?"

She checked her watch. "No, let’s make it number two."

Belland nodded, two was a much shorter route. "See you in an hour, ma’am."

* * * * *

O’Neill went back to Fraiser’s office.

"Something’s wrong with Carter," he said simply. "I thought it was just me, but now she’s started snapping at Daniel."

Fraiser bit her lower lip. "Did you try talking to her?" 

O’Neill slumped back in his chair exasperated. "Talking to her? Have you had anything _close_ to something you could call a conversation with her lately?"

Fraiser considered this. _Yes and no._ "What set her off on Daniel?" she asked.

"I dunno, Doc, something about MALP data and a backlog. Hell, she should be at home resting. Why the Hell did she come back?"

"What do you think?"

"She’s waiting for her Dad? Four weeks she’s been waiting for him. I dunno why she came back Doc."

"Have you asked her?"

O’Neill threw her a look.

"She won’t talk to you." Fraiser supplied.

"So, what do we do?"

"Do you know where she is now?"

"Yeah, up top for a walk. I checked with the sentries, she should be back in less than an hour."

"Doc," he started again, "something is wrong with her and its been getting worse for a while. She’s really jumpy and quiet. I don’t think she’s sleeping. I figured going home would help her sort it out but it hasn’t, and now she’s back she’s worse than when she left. We have to do something."

"What do you suggest, Colonel?"

He huffed. "Shine a bright light in her eyes until she talks?" 

"I think that would be counter-productive, don’t you?" Fraiser managed a half smile.

He waved his arms defeated. "I’m desperate." Fraiser raised her eyebrows. "Okay, so I’m getting stir crazy down here."

"You need a hobby."

"I have hobbies, Doc, just not ones I can do underground. My team’s falling apart and I don’t know why. Doc, you have to help me here. I’m losing them."

"Okay, so she won’t talk to me and she won’t talk to you. She’s started getting aggressive with Daniel. That leaves Teal’c. How are they getting on?"

"Okay, I guess. You know Teal’c, he doesn’t say much."

Janet considered her next move for a moment. This had gone far enough. "Colonel, I’ve been worried about Sam for a while now. I was hoping that she would confide in her team-mates but that’s not happening. She is getting worse. We might have to force things."

"How?"

"Being more persistent. I don’t want to push her into a corner, she could bolt, but you’re right, something is wrong and I think we have to get to the bottom of it."

"Well I tried, she just ran. Daniel’s moping like a smacked puppy. He’s not in a persistent mood right now."

"What about Teal’c? With a little coaching, he could be just the counselor she needs."

"I like the way you think, Doc. Outside the chain of command, sensible, solid." The colonel rose, "I’ll go get him."

* * * * *

Teal'c settled to parade rest in front of Fraiser's desk. "I agree with your assessment of the situation. Major Carter’s behavior has become quite erratic. She has also become self depreciating. However, I did not previously feel it appropriate to challenge her regarding it."

"Oh, I think _challenge_ is too strong a word, Teal’c," Fraiser warned, "just be inquisitive and concerned."

"Yeah, " Jack agreed, "but don’t let her blow you off. Be persistent."

Teal’c raised an eyebrow to his CO. "I will be persistent O’Neill."

**  
**

6

Sam Carter felt tired, but for the umpteenth night in a row she couldn’t sleep. The walk hadn’t helped and she had settled laying face down on her bunk, fully clothed, hugging her pillows and staring into space. When someone shattered the silence with a knock at her door, she jumped, cursed at herself for jumping and snapped, "Go away!".

"Major Carter, I wish to speak with you, may I enter?"

"What do you want?" she moaned.

Teal’c opened the door and entered the room, closing it firmly behind him. "I wish to speak with you regarding a matter of great concern to me."

Sam turned to the door. "Looks like you’re in already, you might as well sit down." She lowered her weary body back down onto the pillows.

Teal’c pulled up a chair and settled himself stiffly next to her bunk. The silence hung in the air for a few moments. Sam broke first, turning toward him skeptically. "Spit it out Teal’c. I’m tired and I just can’t be bothered right now."

"That is why I have come. We have noticed a change in your behavior since our last mission. It is beginning to concern us." 

"Who’s us?" she said through the pillow, knowing full well who.

"Colonel O’Neill, Daniel Jackson, Dr Fraiser and myself."

"You get the short straw this time?"

Teal’c inclined his head. "I would not entrust such an act of chance with a matter of this importance. I am aware of the tension that exists between the you and the others. I therefore wish to offer you my direct assistance." 

"Why?"

"We have fought together side by side in many battles. We have had success and failure, but on this occasion something has deeply affected you. I wish to understand and therefore to assist." 

"You have no idea, Teal’c," she muttered to herself.

"It has been a difficult time. However, SG-1 will soon re-enter mission rotation."

"Great."

Teal’c inclined his head quizzically. "Your response to this notion is part of what concerns me, Major Carter. I do not believe that you are looking forward to returning to active duty."

"So?" 

"This is not a feeling shared by the rest of SG-1. It is also out of character for you. This is of great concern to me."

"I don’t want to talk about it right now, Teal’c. I’m tired."

"You have been experiencing difficulty in sleeping," he stated.

"It’s nothing, Teal’c. Please, can you just leave me alone."

"I cannot do that."

"Teal’c, I have a problem and I’m dealing with it, can’t you just respect that?"

"I have known you to solve problems much more complex than this one with enthusiasm and drive."

"Yeah, right." 

"In a few short months you were able to design and construct a particle beam generator. This was successful in facilitating the re-activation of the Edorran Stargate and the rescue of Colonel O’Neill. Are you not proud of such achievements?"

"Not sure sometimes he wanted to be rescued," she moped. 

"I can assure you that he was very pleased to see me."

"Yeah, maybe."

"There have been other occasions I can recall."

"You’re trying to make me feel good."

"I am trying to demonstrate the high regard in which you are held by your colleagues and friends at this facility. You seem to have forgotten that they have offered their support."

"I’ve not forgotten, Teal’c. This is something I have to figure out and get through on my own."

"I do not understand why you feel this way. Daniel Jackson and Colonel O’Neill have turned to each other and myself for support. I would like to be of assistance to you also."

Carter rose from the bed and gathered up her jacket.

"Thank you, Teal’c," she said quietly, "but I have to do this on my own. Please excuse me I have some work to do." She left him in her quarters and fled to the security of the astrophysics lab. There she sat staring blankly into space.

* * * *

O’Neill slowly opened the door to the small astrophysics lab. There she was, slumped over the desk, fast asleep. _Cute_ he thought, _bang goes the not sleeping theory_. "Major," he said softly as he reached out and touched her arm.

Suddenly she whirled around. Something struck him in the face so fast he didn’t have time to cry out. He fell away, tumbling against the banks of equipment and into darkness.

"Oh my God," Carter whispered, her hands covering her face. She was wide awake, breathing hard. "Colonel?" she couldn’t bear to look at him, she couldn’t believe what she’d done. "No," she tried to tell herself, "No, I didn’t… Oh God, I didn’t know…" she whimpered. "Oh God, no!" She pushed the door, and ran.

Jack O’Neill stirred, his eyes blinking open. He struggled to his feet, hit the alarm button then slumped back onto the floor in a heap and held his head. "Jesus, Carter…" he muttered to no one.

* * * * *

Like the rest of SG-1, Daniel Jackson had been spending a lot of time in the mountain. His quarters were crammed full of books and journals. Every spare nook and cranny had something stashed in it. He was a natural hoarder. He liked to have things to hand. Artifacts were his lifeblood, his inspiration. But he was having trouble getting inspired tonight. 

Sam’s outburst had cut into him like a knife. All his guilt had returned in a flood. Even though he and Sam had talked about it for hours in the infirmary. She had said she didn’t blame him. She didn’t blame any of them. It was just one of those things. Daniel didn’t always understand how Sam’s military mind took over, but she seemed to have come to terms with it. But that conversation seemed like a very long time ago. 

Jackson reflected on her odd behavior the few days before she went home. She was on edge and jittery. She’d been in her lab a lot, but she never really seemed to be doing anything. They’d tried, in vain, to get her to go to the commissary for dinner with them. She made excuses. Lots of excuses. Too many for his liking. There was something else going on but he couldn’t put his finger on it. Then when she was home she wouldn’t always answer the phone, didn’t want them to come round or stay long if they did. Now she was back on the base and she didn’t seem any better. In fact she was worse. He desperately wanted to help her but he had to admit he was slightly scared of her when she was angry. _Let Jack try…_

Jackson checked his watch. It was late and he should turn in. He shut down his computer and reached over to the small bottle of pills Fraiser had given him. _Twenty minutes and I’m outta here,_ he thought. He wrestled with the cap. _Twenty minutes to open the damn thing more like._

"Daniel!" She burst into the room, tears flooding down her cheeks. She slammed and locked the door behind her.

"Sam?"

"Daniel," she cried, "please, you have to help me."

"Sam, what’s wrong?"

She collapsed onto the edge of his bed and held her head in her hands. "I didn’t mean it, Daniel. You have to tell them that, I didn’t know. I was asleep and I…"

"Sam, what’s the matter? What are you talking about?"

She looked up eyes wide and petrified at the thought that had just occurred to her. "They’re gonna lock me up, Danny."

"What? Who, Sam?"

"There’re gonna court-martial me and lock me up. Danny, I didn’t mean it, I swear I’d never hurt him. I…"

Daniel knelt beside her and took her arms. "Sam, what did you do?"

"I didn’t mean it…" she whimpered. "Oh God, now I’ve really screwed up my life."

"Sam," he lifted up her head and gently pushed some stray hair out of her eyes. "Sam, you’re not making any sense, just calm down and tell me what happened."

"I hit him, Daniel. I think he’s dead."

"Dead? Sam? Who did you hit?"

She shuddered. "He scared me, I just lashed out. He hit his head when he fell. I didn’t mean to hurt him!"

"Sam, it’s okay," he soothed. "Who scared you?"

"Colonel O’Neill. I am so screwed up Danny. They’re gonna throw me out. I didn’t mean it!" She collapsed in sobs again. 

"Where Sam? Where were you?"

"My lab. Daniel, please, don’t let them lock me up. I couldn’t stand that. Please, I didn’t mean to hurt him…"

"Sam, its okay, we’ll sort this out."

Daniel grabbed the phone and dialed the infirmary. Fraiser answered. "Doc, it’s Daniel, Jack’s…" he started.

"He’s right here," Fraiser interrupted. "Please tell me Sam’s with you."

"Yeah, she is. Is Jack okay?" 

Carter looked desperately at him, Daniel muttered an affirmative to Fraiser and hung up.

"Daniel?"

Daniel Jackson sat on his bed beside her and wrapped his arm around his friend. "He’s just fine, Sam, no harm done." 

She relaxed for a split second as relief washed over her. Then she was tense again. 

"Sam," he soothed, "it’s okay."

She shook him off. "You don’t understand, they’ll court-martial me for just hitting him. I’ll go to jail then they’ll discharge me. I’ll lose everything!" She became more agitated. "Danny, I can’t take this any more, please don’t let them lock me up." 

"My god, Sam, what’s wrong with you? No one’s gonna lock you up."

She rose and pulled away from him. "You don’t get it do you?" her eyes darted around the room desperately. "They will Danny. They will. I’m sorry, I just… I didn’t mean to hurt him." She rubbed at her eyes then cradled her right hand against her body. It was starting to hurt. "I didn’t mean to hurt any of you."

Daniel approached her cautiously, she backed away and fetched up against a book case.

"Sam, tell me exactly what happened. Just take your time."

She bolted for the door. "They know where I am, I have to get outta here." 

Daniel blocked her way. He knew if she really wanted to get past him he wouldn’t stand a chance. She didn’t force it.

"Please, Daniel. Let me go."

"Just tell me what happened, Sam. I’ll talk to them, everything will be okay."

She thought about it, he led her back to the bed and sat her down. He knelt in front of her and took her arms. He gripped them softly, noticing for the first time how thin she looked and felt. "You were in the lab. What happened?"

She sniffed. "I think I fell asleep. Someone, Colonel O’Neill, grabbed me and I was scared and I lashed out."

"So you punched him?"

She nodded the tears welling up into her eyes again. "He fell against the monitors and he wasn’t moving, Daniel, I didn’t know it was him. He scared me, I…" 

Daniel pulled her into his arms and let her cry. "It’s okay, Sam. He’s fine. Doc’s got him all fixed up already."

"But, Daniel," she started. 

He silenced her with a finger on her lips. "Sam, why were you sleeping in the lab?"

"I was working, I was tired. I thought I’d just shut my eyes for few minutes."

"You should have gone to bed."

She shook her head. "I can’t sleep, Daniel. I keep waking up all the time. Having nightmares. I’m so tired, I wanna sleep but I just can’t. I don’t know what to do anymore. Please, you have to help me. I can’t do this anymore!"

"It’s all right, Sam, I’ll help you. You know I will."

"I’m so messed up, Danny, I dunno what I’m doing. I just wanna sleep. I hurt all over and I can’t sleep."

"Have you asked Janet for something?"

"What, you mean pills?" 

He nodded.

"Daniel, I don’t need drugs, I need sleep."

"I know, Sam, I know what it’s like. After a while it starts messing with your head. It’s okay to take sleeping pills, Sam. I’ve been taking them for the last couple of weeks, They’ve really helped. Look." He held up the bottle from his desk. 

She looked at him, eyes glistening in the dim light. She took a couple of deep breaths. "I’ve been so stupid."

"No, just wrong to think you have to try and get through this on your own. Sam, I’m your friend, we’re all your friends here. We want to help you but you have to let us."

"I just want things back the way they were," she stated.

"So do I. Let’s go see Janet, right now."

"I dunno," she started warily, pulling away. He took her hand and squeezed it gently. "Ouch!" She ripped it from his grasp and cradled it against her body rocking slightly back and forth.

"Sam, did you hurt your hand?" She was crying again, silently she nodded. "Can I see?" She held it out. The knuckles were red and starting to swell. "You need to get that looked at." Daniel stood, "Come on, let’s go to the infirmary."

"No, they’ll arrest me and lock me up. They’ll call MacKenzie and he’ll take me away." She skittered into the corner and hunched down. Her eyes darting around the room behind him again.

"No, Sam, I promise that’s not gonna happen. Janet wants to help you. We’ll go right now. She’ll look at your hand and give you something to help you sleep. We can sort the rest out in the morning." He approached her. She was rocking back and forth again. 

"Danny, please help me."

"I will, now come on, let’s go."

He helped her to stand and supported her as she shuffled across the room. He opened the door. Teal’c blocked the way, five armed guards behind him.

"Major Carter, Daniel Jackson." Teal’c intoned. Sam hid behind Daniel. 

"I told you Daniel.." she whispered.

"It’s all right, Teal’c, Sam and I have had a chat and we’re going to the infirmary. We don’t need the goons."

"They are here by General Hammond’s order. We are to escort you."

"Danny, they’ll..."

Daniel turned to Sam. "It’s okay." He turned around again. "Teal’c will escort us to the infirmary and these guys are gonna hang out here." An understanding passed between Teal’c and Daniel. 

"That will satisfy General Hammond’s orders." He turned to the armed men. "Please holster your weapons, your presence is no longer required." The men lowered their guns slowly. Teal’c stepped between the men and motioned Daniel and Sam out. "You may proceed." 

Daniel wrapped his arm firmly around Carter’s waist and led her away, her eyes darting back over her shoulder. 

"They will not harm you, Major Carter," Teal’c reassured as the men followed at a discrete but noticeable distance. 

* * * * * *

"She’s a mess, Jack. She just disintegrated right in front of me." Hammond and Jackson stood around O’Neill’s cot. He had some strips closing a wound on his forehead and a growing bruise on the side of his face. O’Neill fingered the bruise tentatively. 

"She still packs a punch, huh." Daniel teased until O’Neill glared at him silently.

"General," Daniel went on, "she’s terrified about being court-martialed and thrown in jail."

Hammond looked at O’Neill. "I need a complaining officer to even consider a court-martial."

"Don’t look at me, General, I had a fight with a computer," O'Neill said sourly.

"That’s what I thought. Doctor Jackson, Major Carter obviously needs help and she’s going to get it." Hammond looked over to the curtained-off area where Fraiser was with her. "A court-martial will serve no purpose in this situation. I don’t like losing a good officer, especially like this. Hopefully we’ve caught her in time."

"Carter’s a good kid, General, she’ll get through this." O’Neill said trying to convince himself.

Fraiser pulled back the curtain and stepped towards them. Carter was lying on her side facing away from them, curled in a fetal ball.

"How is she, Doctor?" Hammond asked quietly.

Fraiser took a deep breath. "She’s completely exhausted, sir. Mentally and physically. I guess it was just a matter of time before something like this happened."

"But how’d she get this bad?"

"Lack of sleep, Colonel. That and she hasn’t been eating much. It’s all just mounted up. This," she motioned to O’Neill’s face, "is probably the best thing that could have happened."

"How’d you figure that?" O’Neill moped.

"Striking a superior officer is a serious court-martial offence, Colonel."

"Not gonna happen, Doc," he dismissed the notion flatly.

"I should hope not. But still, it made her realize she wasn’t in control anymore. If you hadn’t woken her up like that, this could have gone on for weeks."

"We would have noticed," O’Neill insisted.

"Maybe, Colonel, maybe not. She managed pretty well to fool us all this past week. She’s hardly slept or eaten anything since leaving the infirmary. Hadn’t any of you noticed she was losing weight?"

O’Neill shook his head.

"I did, tonight," Jackson offered.

"She’s worn herself out. She needs to rest."

"Can I talk to her now?" Hammond asked.

"Sorry sir, I’ve given her a hefty sedative, she’ll be out for at least ten hours."

"Please call me when she’s awake, Doctor," Hammond requested.

"Yes sir. In the meantime, Doctor Jackson, I need to have a little chat with you about something."

"Okay…" He followed her back to her office . Hammond made his excuses . O’Neill stared silently at Carter’s back and wished he could talk to her, even though he didn’t know what to say.

"Daniel, Sam wanted me to ask you something about P4T3DY."

"What about it?"

"It doesn’t make much sense but it has something to do with Doctor MacKenzie."

"I dunno, Doc, she was babbling about a lot of things. She said something about not wanting to see MacKenzie but I dunno what that has to do with me."

"She said you would know why."

Daniel thought about it for a few moments. "Maybe she thinks I saw something. My glasses were gone everything was blurry. Wait, I know. Geez he must have looked just like him." 

"Who?"

"Their leader, I bet he looked just like MacKenzie. No wonder she doesn’t want anything to do with him."

"That makes sense now."

"Does she have to see him?"

"No, Daniel, I’ll find someone else. Later it might be useful for him to be involved but not right now. Daniel, I wanted to thank you for what you did tonight. She was in a very fragile state. You got her here in one piece. Thank you."

"Is she going be okay, Janet?"

"I’m sure she’ll be fine, Daniel, it’s just going to take a little more time. She’s gonna need all the help and support we can give her." Daniel nodded. "You should get some sleep yourself, Daniel. I’m sure she’d like to see you in the morning."

"Yeah, thanks, Janet." Daniel rose and left.

**  
**

7

It was hard to tell it was morning 16 floors underground but there was a buzz in the infirmary when she awoke. She lay still, very still for a while. Just listening. It was the normal daily stuff. SG-4 had just returned from their mission and were being checked out. It was a normal day. But not for her.

Sam Carter lay still and thought about her life. Where she was, how she got there and where she wanted to be. She wanted to be at the SGC and that hadn’t changed. She wanted to figure out all there was to figure out about the Stargate. She wanted to discover something else every day and still know there was more to do. More places to go and more things to see. She didn’t want to leave. She wanted to go back out.

Major Carter listened to the banter between the members of SG-4. They were a lot like her team, and she missed them. They’d all been walking around each other on eggshells since they got back and she was finally sick of it. 

Sick of hiding from them. Sick of lying to them, and herself.

Fraiser had been right about a lot of things, including that everything would be clearer when she’d got some decent sleep. She did feel a little better. Yesterday was as low as she’d let herself get. She had reached her nadir, now it was time to start the long climb back to normality. She knew she couldn’t do it alone, she needed help. She made her decision and rolled over.

Fraiser spotted the movement and came over. Sam rubbed her eyes and smiled.

"Hey," Fraiser cooed, "how you feeling?"

"Pretty stupid actually, but better, thanks."

"Good, you know I was just thinking about waking you up. You’ve been asleep for over 14 hours."

"Really? What time is it?"

"A little after 12."

"Geez, I guess I needed it." Her eyes and mind wandered.

"Uhuh." Fraiser hugged her clipboard and eyed her patient, her friend. There was a strength in her eyes she hadn’t seen for a while but also a darkness. "Something’s on you mind, Sam. Care to share?"

Carter half smiled. "I do need to talk to you, about a lot of stuff, but not out here."

"My office?" 

Sam nodded and sat up. She leaned on her hand. "Ow!"

"Careful, it’s not broken but it’ll be sore for a couple of days."

She flexed her fingers gingerly. "No kidding. Damn." She looked around. "Is he still here?"

"Nope, he escaped first thing this morning. He’s fine though, no harm done."

"Yeah, right." Carter swung her legs out from under the covers and realized she wasn’t exactly fully dressed. She pulled at the gown disapprovingly.

"Do you wanna get washed up and dressed first? Maybe a bite to eat?"

She thought about that last bit. Actually she was hungry, which she knew had to be a good sign.

"Yeah," she said, "but just a sandwich or something."

"Coming right up. You know where the showers are and I’ll get you some clean clothes."

"Thanks, Doc."

"No problem."

Carter looked around, as if looking for something.

"Sam?"

"Where’s Teal’c? He’s always here."

"I thought you would prefer some privacy. I can get him if you want."

"Oh, no, you’re right. Just seems strange waking up without him there."

"You had a full house this morning, even General Hammond stopped by for a while."

"Oh." Her mind wandered. "I guess I’d better get moving…" Sam slipped slowly off the edge of the bed and wandered towards the shower room, pausing once to rearrange the gown. 

Fraiser watched her go. She had expected Carter to handle her capture better than she had. It had occurred to her that there could be more to this than met the eye and now she was sure. Walking back to her office she had a feeling she wasn’t going to like what Sam was going to tell her.

* * * * *

It was a tuna sandwich, one of Sam’s favorites. Fraiser had also rustled up a couple of blueberry muffins from the commissary along with a pot of fresh coffee and the almond flavoring Sam liked. A tempting feast, she hoped.

Sam Carter appeared at her door looking a lot more like herself than she had in a month. She’d taken the trouble to dry her hair properly and put on a little makeup. But there was a darkness behind her eyes, and she moved with the weight of the world on her shoulders.

"Come in, Sam, have a seat." Fraiser poured the coffee and revealed her acquisitions. 

Sam smiled and started munching on the sandwich. She was hungrier than she thought. She let Fraiser talk about Cassandra’s latest exploits at Summer Camp. Fraiser killing the time whilst Sam was eating. Carter finished the muffins and took a long swig of coffee. The conversation died a little as she poured another cup and added the powder. She stirred it, watching the vortices flow around with the spoon, the steam rise in a swirl above the rim.

"I’ve had a chat with Colonel O’Neill and General Hammond," Fraiser interrupted her thoughts. "There won’t be any charges over last night. They would, however, like some reassurances that it won’t be happening again."

"It won’t," she said simply and sipped the coffee.

"Good. So, you wanted to chat."

"Yeah." She put the cup down and took a deep, calming breath. "I need to tell you something and I know you’re going to have to report it, which means I’m gonna have to tell the guys as well because I don’t want them to read about it in a report. I can’t do that to them. I owe them too much for that." It was a carefully considered speech. She’d thought this through in the shower. Rehearsed it to herself to get it right. To say what she wanted to. How she wanted to. Already, the edge in her voice was building. She was starting to crumble underneath. She took another deep breath and rubbed the bridge of her nose and forehead, composing herself again.

"What is it, Sam?" Fraiser asked quietly.

Sam struggled to stay on her script, but it dissolved in her tears and she just poured everything out in an untidy jumble. 

They decided to both go to General Hammond’s office together. Sam waited in the briefing room whilst Fraiser delivered the bad news. 

He asked the same questions Fraiser had and she explained Sam’s answers. It was harder for him to understand the _why_ and he wrestled with it for a few minutes. 

Sam got restless and poured herself some coffee, slumping back into the chair facing away from the window. She stared out at the Stargate and shuffled her feet and wondered what she would tell her father about this. If he ever showed up. Martouf had warned her it could be weeks before he was contactable. It had been four already.

Hammond called O’Neill, Jackson and Teal’c to his office. Then quietly opened the door and motioned the guards away. Carter bolted to attention, nearly spilling her coffee. "As you were, Major."

"Yes sir," she replied, but remained standing.

"Doctor Fraiser has explained the situation to me, Major." 

"Yes sir."

"There are some secrets not meant to be kept, Major, and this is one of them." He avoided using the standard ‘ _I’m disappointed in you,_ ’ phrase. Fraiser had specifically warned him against it. But Sam could see it in his eyes. She fought to stay in control. 

"Yes sir," she managed.

"This situation nearly got out of hand, Major. I don’t want it to happen again."

"No sir."

The general’s face softened. "You are a fine officer Major Carter, one of the best I’ve had the pleasure to command. A credit to your family and this facility. I hope that you can trust us all to help you through this difficult time."

"Yes sir."

"Sam!" Daniel called brightly as he entered the room with O’Neill and Teal’c following in his wake. "General."

"Gentleman, please wait in my office." Hammond said without turning towards them.

"Sure," O’Neill smiled and waved at Sam as he walked past her, she half smiled back.

Fraiser let them into the office and shut the door. 

"Courage is a quality I value greatly, Major, along with honesty. Your team members will appreciate your honesty in this situation. And the courage you have mustered to deliver it to them." He paused, she was crumbling. "Carry on, Major."

She saluted him automatically. He returned it and walked quietly away. He had a call to make. A _very_ long distance call.

Sam’s head dropped as she closed her eyes and breathed deeply. Fraiser approached her. "You okay?"

Sam ruffled her own hair, stood up straight and looked at the closed door to Hammond’s office. The blinds were closed and someone was peeking through them. They snapped shut when she looked his way.

She sighed. "They deserve to hear this from me." She said. " I should have done this weeks ago."

Fraiser let her hand linger on her friend's arm. "Do you want me to wait, Sam?" she asked supportively.

"Yeah, thanks." Carter said quietly

"Okay, I’ll be right here." 

Sam Carter opened the door to the general's office and closed it behind her. 

"Where’d Hammond go?" Daniel asked. "I thought he wanted to talk to us."

"No," she said evenly. "I wanted to talk to all of you together. Just the four of us."

"What’s up, Major?" O’Neill had been lounging on the couch next to Daniel. But he sat forward and suddenly had an uneasy feeling.

She slid into the chair in front of them, taking a few moments to compose the words in her head. "There’s something I need to tell you and I need you to just listen."

"Okay," O’Neill said lightly, "we can do that. We can listen."

"No wisecracks, no interruptions, you don’t say a word until I’ve finished."

"Okay," Daniel said warily. 

She looked at O’Neill. "Sir?" 

"Okay."

Teal’c tilted his head in agreement.

"Okay," she took another deep breath, "I have to tell you something that I didn’t think you would need to know. But it’s messing with my head so I’m gonna have to tell you."

O’Neill screwed up his face in a _Tell us what?_ expression.

"First of all I need to make you understand why I didn’t tell you about this before, because I know you’re gonna be mad at me."

O’Neill broke. "Takes a lot to make me mad, Carter. Is this about last night, cos you know…"

"It’s not about last night, sir, and I am sorry about that but, no, this is something else. Well it’s kinda to do with last night, but will you just let me finish?"

Daniel elbowed him quiet. "Go on, Sam."

She rubbed her still puffy eyes and spoke through her hands. "I didn’t tell you on the planet because I knew it’d make you mad and I thought you might do something stupid."

O’Neill definitely didn’t like where this was going and opened his mouth. Daniel silenced him with a wave. She looked up at them. "It wouldn’t have made a difference if you’d known then anyway so I didn’t tell you. Then I didn’t say anything when we got back cos I figured it didn’t matter anymore, and I could handle it myself." Her eyes flickered around the room gauging their reactions.

All three men were looking decidedly uncomfortable. "I’ve been having some problems and well I guess I worked myself into the state I was in yesterday which made me realize I was losing it." She stopped, her eyes closed.

"Sam," Daniel said slowly, "what happened to you?"

She bit her lower lip as a sob tried to escape. She covered her mouth for an instant until it was gone. _Spit it out you idiot!_

"It was the first night, they’d split us up. After they took you from the cell next to me, up to the hall I guess, cos that's where I saw you later" Daniel nodded. "Well, they’d already knocked me around a bit right after they captured us." She paused, not able to look at them anymore. "There were four of them." She continued slowly. "They came in and started kicking me and then… then they took off my uniform and…" She couldn’t finish the sentence. She didn’t have to.

"Oh, Sam, no," Daniel whispered. She looked up, tears streaming down her cheeks.

"I’m sorry," she blurted, "I tried to fight ‘em off but they just held me down and took turns." Daniel shifted in his seat. "I didn’t want you to know because I knew you’d get mad and…"

Jack O’Neill did not want to believe his eyes and ears, but just looking at her he knew it was true. He buried his head in his hands. "Jesus, Carter."

"I’m sorry," she pleaded, "I didn’t want them to use me against you. When they’d finished they left me alone for a while," She offered it as a consolation. O’Neill looked up. "After that they just kicked me around."

Anger welled within O’Neill. He fought to control it before he exploded. He’d gone through this possibility at the time. Here it was again. This time a sickening reality. Daniel sat in shock.

Sam looked up at Teal’c for some response. He inclined his head and said softly, "I agree with Major Carter’s assessment of the situation on the planet. It would not have been beneficial to reveal the circumstances of her injuries. I believe this would have clouded our judgment."

O’Neill’s, head bolted upright. "Teal’c," O’Neill warned. Teal’c tilted his head again, as O’Neill simmered. 

"From your reaction now, it is simple to extrapolate what your reaction would have been at the time. However," he continued, looking down at Carter, "I am disappointed that you did not feel able to share this with us when the danger had passed. We are your friends and would not wish you to carry this burden alone."

Her head sank. " I know I let you guys down, I’m sorry…" She stood up to leave.

O’Neill fought his way out of the steaming, boiling pot churning in his head. He couldn’t let her walk away with out saying something. "Just a minute, Major. I have something to say here." He stood in front of her and looked directly into her eyes. "You haven’t let anyone down, Carter. Especially not us. You made a hard decision to protect the rest of your team and that took guts. But when we got back…"

"I know, sir. I should have said something but I just couldn’t."

"Sam," O’Neill said taking her arms, "promise me you’ll never keep something like this from us again."

She nodded, fighting back the tears.

"Come here," he pulled her into his arms. She wrapped herself into him and cried.

"We’ll get through this, Carter," he soothed. "Everything will be just fine."

Daniel sat for a moment dumbfounded then he rose and hugged her himself.

O’Neill quietly left the office with Teal’c and leaned wearily against the wall. "Tell me you didn't know about this."

"I always suspected but she didn't say anything until this morning."

"She didn’t tell anyone?"

Fraiser shook her head. He absorbed the information and rubbed his eyes again. "She gonna be all right?" He glanced back at Daniel and Carter. They were leaning on each other, both crying.

"Might take some time, Colonel. She’s gonna need a lot of support for a while."

"We will provide for her needs, Doctor," Teal’c intoned.

"I know you will Teal’c, but you all need to come to terms with this. Colonel, she doesn’t need your anger."

"I know." He rubbed the bridge of his nose. "You gonna stick around for Carter?" Fraiser nodded. "Good, I have a feeling I’m not going to be a nice person to be around for a while. I think I’ll hit the range. Teal’c?"

"I shall remain also. Daniel Jackson may require my presence."

"Great." O’Neill forced himself to walk slowly to the door. Inside his blood boiled. 

A few hundred rounds later it was still simmering.

**  
**

8

Teal’c took Daniel back to his quarters and stayed with him until the pills kicked in and he was asleep. Fraiser didn’t want him left alone for a while. 

Sam didn’t want to go to her quarters, too claustrophobic, so Fraiser took her back to the infirmary and set her up in the corner cot.

"Do you want a sedative?" she asked the curled-up form in front of her. 

Sam shook her head. "Not right now, maybe later. I got some stuff to think about."

"Holler if you need anything, okay?"

She nodded, pulling the pillows tightly around her. As Fraiser pulled the curtain round the bed Sam closed her eyes. She could see their faces, disbelieving, horrified, knowing. A lump started to form in her throat and she buried her head in the pillow.

Up top the sun was starting its daily arc downwards. Jack O’Neill had found a quiet clearing amongst the great trees and watched it set. He’d seen so many suns set in his lifetime, in these few short years, but this was his own. Alone in the clearing, far from anyone who might care, he sat and considered if it was worth it after all. What they had achieved, where they had gone. What they had done and how they had done it. They’d done it together. _Always together_. 

When he’d first met Carter at the SGC he hadn’t liked her much. Well, no, that wasn’t quite right, he hadn’t liked the thought of having another smartass scientist on his team. Things had changed a lot since then, and Carter had been right. He did like her once he got to know her. But still she managed to annoy him. That enthusiasm for all things technical and her joy in sharing that knowledge, even when he didn’t need or want to know. 

He half laughed at himself. That annoying habit was the one thing he’d missed most since they returned from that planet. It was so much a part of who and what she was. She thought a lot and liked to share those thoughts. She hadn’t been like that in a long time. That spark had been extinguished and now he knew why. He’d missed her. Somehow what he’d said to her didn’t seem anything like enough. He wanted to say more but he didn’t know what or how to say it. Silently he sat alone and shivering in the chilly night air, searching the stars for inspiration. 

Quietly from the forest, Teal’c emerged carrying a large jacket. He placed it around Jack’s shoulders and sat down without saying a word. The silence lasted a few minutes longer, each man alone with his thoughts and together under the stars.

"Damned crazy galaxy, Teal’c." O’Neill said finally.

"It is the only one we have. We must make the best of it," Teal’c said quietly.

"We get knocked out and banged up all the time, Teal’c, and we’ve lost some good people, but nothing like this has ever happened."

"We cannot change our past, O’Neill. And there is much I would not wish to." Teal’c looked at O’Neill for the first time. "We must rebuild. The Goa’uld will not stop even if we do. We must continue our search for allies, continue to help those enslaved or in need. However, we must start by rebuilding SG-1." He looked away again. "You must not second-guess your decisions on the planet, Colonel O’Neill. It will serve no useful purpose."

"I know."

"We must allow Major Carter to reenter her position as and when she wishes to do so." He looked at O’Neill again. He was holding his head in his hands, knees drawn up close to his body. "She has been burdened by this secret for many weeks. Now she has passed it to us and we must bear it with her."

"A problem shared is a problem halved."

"Or quartered, O’Neill. It has weighed heavily on her soul. We do not have the right to darken it further with our own anger."

"I hear you, Teal’c." He rubbed his eyes. "I know you’re right. I’ve been up here thinking about all the good stuff we’ve done out there."

"There is much to think about."

"Yeah, there is. We’ve done some pretty wonderful stuff for this world, this galaxy, and for each other. I think we forget that sometimes. I know I have, and I think she has too."

"The people we have helped have not. It is a dangerous existence, O’Neill, but the benefits are great. We cannot stop. The evil is still there. We are warriors, and we must fight to defend ourselves and those who cannot defend themselves. I know no other way."

O’Neill listened to his friend’s words carefully and he sighed. "I don’t know another way either, Teal’c. I guess we better start gluing the pieces back together."

"We must."

Jack stuffed his arms into the jacket and stood. "Let’s go back inside, I gotta few things to do."

Teal’c nodded, rose, and together they started the walk back through the forest to the mountain entrance. 

* * * * *

It wasn’t that late. She’d stopped crying hours ago and started thinking again. Crying wasn’t getting her anywhere anyway. So, now what? Now where? 

The infirmary was quiet, just a couple of airmen with minor bumps and scrapes. Nothing major. 

Someone walked in and quietly approached her bed. She knew it was him even before he spoke. She wasn’t sure she wanted to speak to anyone, especially him. Maybe if he thought she was asleep he’d go away. She closed her eyes and lay still. 

He pulled up a chair and sat down. He was glad she was asleep, it made it easier for him to say what he had to say. "I thought it was a good time for us to have a chat," he started. "I have some stuff I need to tell you." He looked at her, she was breathing slowly and evenly, apparently deeply asleep. "Sometimes I don’t tell the people I care about how important they are to me. I lost Sarah because of that." He paused processing that thought and gathering the next. "I just wanted to tell you how important you are to us here. But especially to me. I’ve been thinking about a few things, well a lot of things actually. Mostly about what we’ve done for each other over the years. 

"We’ve never given up on each other before, Carter. You know, Danny and that Babylon fish guy, us in Antarctica, Teal’c with the Bursa and those yucky bug things." He shuddered. "Anyway, there’s other stuff too." He paused, waiting for a reaction that didn't come.

He sighed and continued. "We didn’t really talk about it much but I need to tell you what happened to me on Edorra. I lost everything, Carter. My home, what was left of my family. All the friends I ever had. In fact, my entire life. There were just memories and a lot of work to do. The crater where the gate was, it was literally just a great hole in the ground. I started to dig but then after a while we had to rebuild, harvest the crops and just get on with living. Every day I was there, I thought about home. I thought about you. But you weren’t there. Just me and the Edorrans." He could still remember chopping wood, the smell of the open fire.

"Fraiser says you worked yourself half to death in those three months. Nothing else mattered to you. I could have got picked up in a few more months by the Tollans, they wouldda had me home in time for the playoffs, but you couldn’t sit around and wait that long. You wouldn’t give up. I thought there was no way home, Carter. I thought I’d never see any of you again. And I was just getting used to the idea. I was settling down and then on the exact same day I let go, Laira heard a voice on the radio. When she told me it was like my whole life was handed back to me.

"Carter, I’d given up on ever going home, I’d given up on you. I’m not gonna make that mistake twice. If you _ever_ wanted to get me outta your hair, there was your chance, right there. So I guess you’re stuck with me. Stuck with all of us." He sighed again trying to regroup.

"We’re a team, Sam. We help each other. We live together, we get tranqued together, hell we’ve even died together. I can’t imagine this place or SG-1 without you, Sam. I mean who else am I gonna find who’s just as happy planting a line of claymores as they are messing with soil samples or playing with MALPs and UAVs." That made her smile, but he couldn’t see.

He shifted in his seat as he re-gained is momentum. "We’ve done a lot of good out there, Carter. There are a lot of people who owe their lives to you and the rest of us because we go out there and do what we have to do to get the job done. To make this world, this whole damned galaxy, a better place. Better for Ry’ac, for Cassie, the kids on Orban, for thousands of others. Not to mention saving this rock a few times."

He paused, rubbing the tiredness from his eyes. "What I’m trying to say is that we’re in over our heads in a war here, Carter, and we don’t know who half the bad guys are. Sometimes things are gonna go wrong. But we have to keep going. We have to keep trying.

"I’ve lost a lot of good friends over the years, Carter, and so have you. This is the most important thing we’ve ever done. That we’ll ever do. We can’t stop." Her feet moved under the covers as he struggled for the words. He realized she was awake. He wondered for how long then decided it didn’t matter. He still meant what he’d said.

"I’ve really missed you, Sam," he said quietly. "I’ve missed you trying to tell me stuff I don’t wanna know. That look you get every time you find out something new. How you’re bursting to tell someone, to share it, think it through.

"I know it’s been really hard for you and I want you to know that I’m sorry. If I could go back and change things, you know I would, but I can’t. I couldn’t protect you from this and I know I’ll never be able to promise it won’t happen again, or worse, because I don’t know and that really sucks." It was a hard admission. Not just to her but to himself.

"I know you’re gonna need some time, Sam, but I want you know we’re all here for you. If there’s anything you need you just have to ask and we’ll be there." He was done. She was still trying to play asleep. He leaned over and kissed her gently on the head. He paused for a few moments watching his second play possum.

"One last thing, Sam. If you wanna make me think you’re asleep, don’t wiggle your toes so much, it’s a dead giveaway." She felt him move away.

Slowly she turned over to face him, eyes red and glistening. He was halfway across the room when she called out, "Colonel?" He kept going. "Jack?"

He turned around. Their eyes met. "Thanks," she said.

He smiled at her, his best _everything’s right in the world_ smile. "We’ll talk in the morning kid. See ya!" 

She waved and he waved back. 

Fraiser watched him leave and Sam turn over again. When she checked on her a few minutes later, she was deeply asleep.

**  
**

9

_  
_

Today is the first day of the rest of my life, she told herself. _I am a good and decent person. I’m still the same person I was. I liked myself before and I am still me_. She was still lying in the infirmary cot having slept through the night on her own. No drugs. Well she’d have to check they hadn’t stuck her with anything whilst she was out, but she felt good. Still a little tired, but good. The Colonel knew how to push her buttons. Last night he practically poured his heart out. He wasn’t usually much for pep talks like that but it was just what she needed. She didn’t want him to feel guilty and she knew she’d have to have a similar conversation to the one she’d had with Daniel with them both again, just to make sure they understood 

_  
_

Rape, she told herself, _is a form of torture. I was captured and tortured._ _We did nothing wrong, we couldn’t have changed anything to make it better. It’s over, I’m home. It will not change me. I will not let it change me._ _That’s it. That’s the end of it._

A sense of peace had settled over her. Just telling them had been hard but the relief at not having to keep up the act was so immense it eclipsed her recent dark moods. She was thinking more clearly and suddenly the conversation in the infirmary was getting interesting.

SG-12 were returning from PBH 2T3. Max King, the science officer was rambling about naquadah. There was something else going on too. Fraiser suddenly called all the medics together and gave a little pep talk then they scattered and all hell broke loose. Things were getting noisy, medics were running around and grabbing things from all over. 

Sam sat up in bed and watched, dumbfounded. It looked like they were packing things up to leave. Across the room she spotted Max. Their eyes met. His dark brown eyes lit up and he escaped the nurse and navigated his way over to her.

"What the hell’s going on, Max?" she said before he reached her.

"You will not believe this, Sam," he said excitedly. "We just came back from Hladan, you ’won’t believe this but..."

"Hladan?" she asked.

"That’s what the locals call PBH2T3. Anyway we were wandering about, well skiing, and this great big bear thing lurches out and tried to eat Vince!"

"What?"

"Oh, it didn’t get too close to him. Mickey shot it and killed it." Anyway we took a bunch of rock samples and Sam, hold on..." He rushed back to the cot he’d been at and grabbed a file, then swerved his way back to her. "Look at these."

"The naquadah ore is 50% pure, Sam. We’ve never seen it that pure before, never." 

"Are you sure?"

"Oh yeah, I checked it twice already. Sam you know what this means?"

"Yeah, but..." A nurse crashed into her cot with a trolley loaded with supplies. She apologized and carried on. "Jesus, Max, what the hell is going on in here?"

"Oh, well after we shot the bear this whole bunch of people emerged from a cave near the gate. They’ve been going through a rough winter and we’re launching a humanitarian effort. Like now. Medics, and food mainly. There’s about 500 Hladans shacked up in this cave and their food stores have almost run out. Anyway, they dragged the bear inside and had it roasting within half an hour! It tasted pretty good too!"

That didn’t sound appetizing and the sour look on her face showed. "Hey Sam, what you doing in here anyway?"

"Oh, I just wasn’t feeling well last night, kinda crashed out. I’m fine."

"How’s your hand?" he knew her too well. She was holding something back.

She flexed it slowly and half smiled. "Guess that’s all round the base, huh?"

"‘Fraid so. So what did he do? How’d he get you that mad? And how’d you get away with it?"

She shrugged. "There’s some stuff going on I’d rather not discuss right now."

"Okay, but did it feel good?"

"No," she said distantly, "it felt terrible." She wasn’t lying and he could see that. "Max, please?"

"Okay I’ll drop it. But only if you help me with the mineral survey."

She looked around at the organized chaos surrounding her. "I’m not on active duty, Max. I’ll have to talk to Fraiser, I’m not cleared yet."

"He got you grounded?"

"Not quite, Max. Look, I gotta get dressed and find Fraiser. I’ll meet you in the lab?"

"Great, half an hour?"

"I’ll try, okay."

"Ah, Carter, " he said in his best Jedi master voice, "do, or do not, there is no try." She laughed as he slipped away.

She looked around, she couldn’t see Fraiser or Warner anywhere, no one seemed bothered she was awake so she decided to get herself moving and pulled herself out of bed. 

"Carter!" O’Neill’s voice called through the opened door to the shower room. "Carter, you in here?"

She pulled a large towel round her and turned the shower off. "Sir?"

"Geez, Sam. Don’t just wander off like that. Fraiser’s been looking for you." She came round to the door. He stepped back, suddenly embarrassed.

"Sorry sir, I was just taking a shower. They looked busy, I got out of the way." She stood there dripping and didn’t seemed concerned about anything.

"Well you’d better get some clothes on," he said, embarrassed. "We’re having an emergency meeting in half an hour, main briefing room. Thought you might like to tag along." She was rubbing her hair with a second towel now. 

"This Hladan thing?"

"How’d you know?"

She smiled "I don’t miss much round here sir, I’ll be there. Could you shut the door?" She stepped back into the room.

"Sure," he said. "See you in half an hour."

"Yes sir!" she called out.

That was such a normal Sam-Jack exchange that he couldn’t quite believe it. Sure he’d given her one hell of a pep talk last night but she was just so… normal.

He stood for a few moments outside the closed door and considered the transformation in her attitude that had literally taken place overnight. He smiled, letting himself think it was all his doing and that everything was normal again. Deep down he knew it wasn’t and wouldn’t be for a while. Still Hladan could be a very welcome distraction and there was plenty to keep everyone occupied at the SGC and on the planet. Hammond was recalling teams from leave and ordering supplies like there was no tomorrow. They had to act quickly to stop the Hladans from starving to death. This was going to be big, and though he hadn’t mentioned it to Sam, it was going to be damned cold. Hladan was an ice planet. He shivered at the thought of the Antarctic temperatures and made a mental note to wear an extra sweater under his uniform. 

He spotted Fraiser amongst the heaving masses in the infirmary. He waved to her and pointed to the shower room. She gave him a thumbs up, she understood. He waved good-bye and left before he got run down by a supply-laden trolley.

Sam stopped by the geology lab on her way to the briefing, King was going there anyway so they went together. Sam’s stomach rumbled as they walked down the hall, dodging airmen shifting boxes. "I’ll grab something in a while," she said as King looked at her.

"Maybe there’ll be donuts?" he said optimistically. She didn’t normally partake of donuts but Fraiser said she had lost some weight and needed to build herself up again. It sounded like a great idea.

Their route went past Daniel’s office. The door was ajar and the light on. She stopped. "I’ll catch you up, Max," she said. She waited for him to round the corner and then knocked on the door.

"Dammit Jack, I said I’m coming!" She pushed the door open, Daniel was fussing with a pile of books in a dark corner, under a table.

"Daniel," she said quietly, "it’s me."

He stood up and banged his head on the underside of the table. "Ouch! Sam?" he said slowly crawling out, rubbing his head.

"What are you doing under there?" she asked.

He lifted up a book and waved it in the air. "This," he said, "Croatian-English dictionary. I knew I had one round here somewhere."

"Oh. That’s the Hladans language, huh?"

"Its roots, yeah."

A silence settled, he clutched the book to his chest and shifted from one foot to the other. He didn’t know what to say.

"Are you okay?" she asked.

He raised his eyebrows in surprise. "Am I okay? Sam, it’s me that should be asking you that."

"I’m okay now, Daniel. Really. It was keeping it secret that got me into trouble. I’ve been acting pretty stupid for a couple of weeks. But I know what’s wrong and I’m gonna fix it. You’re not still mad at me are you?"

"No," he said, "I was never mad at you, Sam." Then he was going to say something else but stopped. He didn’t think he could get the words out without blubbering. 

"I did mean what I said in the infirmary, Daniel," She spoke slowly. "I don’t blame any of you for what happened, and I don’t want you to beat yourself up about it. I think I did a good enough job of that by myself." 

He looked at her. "You could have told me, Sam."

She pushed back the tears welling up and nodded. "I know. You know, I’m making a list of all the stupid things I’ve done this week so I can fix them. It’s on my list."

Daniel smiled, crossed the room and hugged her. "Cross it off, Sam. It’s fixed."

She smiled a thank you at him and reached for a Kleenex from the ever-present box on the desk. She wiped her eyes and nose.

"Come on, we’d better get going or we’ll be late." They walked for a while with his arm gently draped round her. It fell away naturally as they entered the public confines of the briefing room.

Sergeant Straw had done himself proud, there were pots of hot, fresh, strong coffee, and a myriad of donuts and muffins. It was the one perk of early morning briefings. Straw didn’t like people going hungry on his watch in the commissary, and the whole base was his to cater for. The SGC ate a lot of muffins and donuts. It was compensation for all those nutritionally balanced field rations they ate whilst off world.

Teal’c and O’Neill were already in the briefing room when they arrived. Teal’c greeted her first with a nod and a "Good morning, Major Carter." He handed her a steaming mug of coffee. 

"Morning, Teal’c. Thanks." She took the mug and smiled easily.

"Good morning, Major." O’Neill was looking at her strangely.

"Morning, sir" She took a sip of the coffee Teal’c had already put the almond flavoring in, she smiled to thank him. He smiled back and nodded regally. 

" _Sleep_ okay, Major?" O’Neill asked smirking knowingly.

"Yes, thank you, sir. You?" She replied innocently, refusing to take the bait.

"Like the proverbial log. Mind you, my feet were a little restless" his eyebrows bounced as he caught Hammond's eye and started over towards him.

Daniel looked puzzled and steered her to a seat near the front. "What was that all about?" he whispered. 

"Nothing," she said innocently, watching O’Neill shuffle into his seat at the front. She caught herself. She’d just lied to him. She turned to Daniel and finished the sentence. "He came to talk to me last night, I pretended to be asleep but he rumbled me."

"What did he say?" Daniel was ever curious, Jack wasn’t known for his oratory talents. And he was mad at him for walking out of the office when he did. He hadn’t had a chance to talk to Jack about that yet.

"All the right things, Daniel. He said everything I needed to hear him say." She sipped on her coffee again. Someone passed around a tray of muffins and donuts she took one of each and passed the tray to Daniel. He looked surprised. "Doctors orders," she whispered.

The room filled up and Hammond called them to order.

**  
**

10

Fraiser looked busy but Sam had to ask now. She had to get her on her side if this was going to work.

Carter tapped on the office door and entered before Fraiser beckoned her in. As she suspected, Fraiser didn’t want to push her away.

"Hi, Sam," she said wearily. "Everything okay?"

"I was wondering if you had a minute. I wanted to ask you about something."

Fraiser didn’t really have the time but she knew Sam needed to talk.

"Sure, Sam, but we might get interrupted. Have a seat."

"That’s okay, I was thinking about this Hladan mission."

Fraiser sat back in her chair. "No," she said. 

Sam hung her head. "Not subtle enough, huh?"

"Nope." _Fight for it Sam._

"But Janet, I have a plan, okay. Please, will you just listen, then you can say no if I’m wrong."

Fraiser raised her eyebrows. This girl was dangerous when she thought about things. It was a good sign she was returning to normal. "Okay, give me your reasons why I should clear you to go to Hladan and they better be good."

"Okay, I know I’ve got some problems, but I know what they are and I have a plan to fix them. Hladan’s perfect Janet." She started to tick the reasons off on her fingers. "It’s secondary contact, the locals are friendly and grateful to us. No cultural problems, no Goa’uld. Max King and I could double-team on the naquadah survey so I wouldn’t be working alone. There’ll be a ton of SGC personnel there as well as SG-1. And you’ll be there too so you can keep an eye on me. Besides, this place will be like a ghost town and I’d rather be with my team. This is perfect. I need to go Janet. I’ve been rattling around this place for too long."

"Major," Fraiser started formally, "you forgot the bears and the fact that the temperature is subzero."

"I passed my fitness test last week, the range just now, and I’ll wear an extra sweater."

Fraiser pushed her chair back from the desk and eyed her patient carefully. 

"Only just; I know; and you’ll need two." The major's face brightened. "But," Fraiser watched her face fall again. "I will only clear you for an excursion with the day units. You come back with me to the SGC tonight and you have to get Colonel O’Neill to agree." 

"No problem." Carter rose from her seat.

"Major," Fraiser warned, "stay out of trouble, no heroics."

Sam snapped to attention, "Yes ma’am."

"Go on then."

Sam Carter visibly bounced out of the door and down the corridor. Fraiser watched her go. The same thought had crossed her mind during the briefing. But she would have preferred it was happening a week from now. Sam was right, it was a good first mission back for all of them. How much trouble could they get into?

As she rounded the corner she pumped the air with her fist and full of herself scuttled off to the locker room where Colonel O’Neill and the rest of SG-1 would be gearing up. 

Almost out of breath, she paused at the door and knocked softly. "Hi guys, you decent?"

"Come in, Sam!" Daniel called. She pushed the door and wandered in. O’Neill wasn’t there. "Where’s the Colonel?"

"Right here Major, what can I do for you?"

"Say yes?"

O’Neill squinted at her. "To what?"

Carter stood up straight. "Permission to rejoin SG-1 for the Hladan mission, sir." Daniel and Teal’c both turned to O’Neill wide-eyed.

Jack’s shoulders slumped. "Carter, as much as I’d like to, you know I can’t override Fraiser." It hurt him to turn her down. But her face beamed a cheeky grin instead of gloom.

"You don’t have to sir, I’ve been cleared by Fraiser to help Major King with the naquadah survey and return to the SGC tonight. But only if you agree."

Jack’s eyebrows rose in surprise.

"How the hell did you talk her into that?" Daniel asked.

"I..."

"AH!" O'Neill silenced her with his usual cry. Her face fell until the broad grin spread across his face. He took the few steps towards her. "Good to have you back, Major." He clapped her on the shoulders.

She positively bubbled with excitement as she exchanged looks with the team.

"Teal’c, go get Carter some winter gear. , Major, you’d better hurry up, we’re due out in 30 minutes."

She saluted. "Yes sir!" He returned it, and turned away to continue getting dressed himself.

"I just gotta grab some stuff from my quarters sir, I’ll be back." She bounced out of the room again. Daniel stole a look at O’Neill. 

"Well I was hardly gonna say no. Look at her, Danny. If she thinks she’s ready for this I gotta give her a chance."

"That call, it was Fraiser, wasn’t it."

"Uh huh."

"This was a set up."

"Strong words, Danny-boy. More like a dangled opportunity. She took the bait." 

"But..."

"Daniel, she could do the survey with King when he gets back and she knows it. She also knows we don’t get many all hands missions like this. Friendly locals, secure environment plenty of on hand back-up. Daniel this is first time out for all of us. It’s a perfect way to get back into things. She knows that, and she wants in. The day pass was the compromise Fraiser needed to clinch it."

Daniel sank down onto the bench and shook his head. 

"She needs this Daniel. We need this."

"You did set her up. Right from the briefing this morning you and Doc have been planning this."

"Just dangling a carrot Danny… Dangling a carrot."

Daniel smiled. "I could have helped you know." 

"Naa, she wouldda prised it outta you. You’re not sneaky enough."

Daniel looked hurt. "I can be sneaky, Jack."

"Good, cos you’re gonna keep an eye on her and make sure she stays outta trouble. Be subtle."

"I can do subtle."

The two men smiled at each other as Teal’c returned loaded with the winter gear. He looked at O’Neill and raised an eyebrow. "He’s in. Sam’s gone to get something." 

"Your plan was successful, O’Neill," he inclined his head approvingly. 

"You mean Teal’c knew as well?" Daniel said feeling even more left out.

"Look, I did try and tell you about it this morning but you were digging for books."

Daniel shifted in his seat and waved the book at them. "Important for the mission," he said sourly.

"Daniel, cheer up will you. She’ll get suspicious. I’m sorry, okay, we didn’t have a lotta time." He squeezed his shoulder. Daniel brightened. 

"You’re a sneaky bastard, Jack O’Neill."

"Why Daniel, what a compliment." They both laughed as she swept back in the door. 

"What did I miss?" she was burrowing in her locker sorting through the gear Teal’c had brought.

They all exchanged looks. "Nothing really, and you haven’t answered my question about Fraiser." Daniel prompted.

She smiled and chattered easily as she got changed. The men listened and prompted in all the right places until she was ready.

"Okay kids, let’s get moving, we’ve got a gate to catch!"

O’Neill watched them file out, smiling at each of them as they passed. Sam paused. "Thank you, sir. I won’t let you down."

"I know, Major." He squeezed her shoulder. "This is gonna be fun," he said. "Cold, but fun." Her smile reached her eyes and his heart melted. "Let’s go."

The embarkation room was bustling with personnel and FREDs loaded with supplies. Sam waved at Max King when she spotted him. He gave her the thumbs up. He’d got the stuff she asked him for. O’Neill winked at him from across the room. His enthusiasm in the infirmary had been genuine, but it had been King who had given them the idea. He’d planted the seeds in her mind. _Teamwork._ King didn’t know all the details, that wasn’t for O’Neill to say, but Max knew a friend in need and was happy to conspire with them and make her think it was all her own idea.

**  
**

11

The network of caves was vast and had been used for generations by the Hladans for shelter and protection. They were a constant 5 degrees Celsius, just enough above freezing to make them habitable. The Hladans had welcomed the extra shelter of tents and were happily huddled together in them. The SG teams were going about their duties. Doc Fraiser had a busy medical station set up. She was selecting the most needy who would be returned to Earth for treatment. The rest were mainly malnourished and a few SGC provided meals, even military rations, supplemented by barbecued blago, were doing wonders for the colony’s morale. Teal’c who had dispatched today’s kill with a shot from his staff weapon was practically a national hero. He took it with good grace, as he would.

The smell wafted throughout the cave complex. It reached Daniel first, then he saw it register with her. She pulled a face as her stomach twisted. A memory pushed itself to the surface. He saw her shudder.

"You okay?"

"Yeah," she replied automatically. A soft tune drifted from the main cavern with the smell.

"Sounds like a little party," Daniel said distantly.

"Why don’t you go, Daniel, I’ll be fine here."

Daniel shook his head. Normally he would have been off like a shot but not today. "They’re really grateful, Sam. It’ll be interesting, fun."

She looked over to the corridor leading to the cavern. She didn’t look sure. "I’ll be right with you, Sam, nothing’s gonna happen, it’s a party."

"I’m not here to party, Daniel, I’m here to do some work." She looked down at her laptop again. The conversation was over.

"You got that list handy, Sam?" He was sailing close to the wind.

She glared at him.

"Come on, you can eat the MREs if you like, just come and sit with us." She wasn’t biting. "Please, Sam?"

He had that sweet, sweet, _I’ll be terribly hurt if you don’t,_ expression. He was pushing her buttons. It was probably the Colonel’s idea anyway. _Nothing bad is gonna happen, it’s just lunch. I’m safe here. Safe._

She tapped a few keys and closed the computer. "Come on, before I change my mind." Daniel’s face lit up. He leapt up enthusiastically and led her from the tent towards the noise and that lovely intoxicating, _terrifying_ smell.

It was completely irrational and she knew it. Off world they got invited to dinner all the time and it was something she would have to get comfortable with again. _No time like the present._ A wave of nausea swept over her as they emerged into the cavern.

There were several large tents erected in the cavern. Fraiser’s medical tent was the biggest. engineering and the science team had also picked their spots. Dotted between them the smaller, three-man tents housed the SGC personnel. In the center of the cave a large fire had been built, and around the perimeter smaller knots of Hladans and SGC people gathered around smaller fires. Some of the Hladans were dancing in a small group and an airman from SG-2 was playing a tune on a harmonica. It was a festive atmosphere. But there was that damned smell.

SG-11 had built a huge barbecue from crates and grills. They were burning wood from the nearby forest. It crackled and smoked beneath the meat. Over on the other side of the barbecue the Hladans were stripping the carcass of the blago. Some of the women were already stretching the hide on a large frame. Others cut portions of meat and passed them along for cooking. Several airmen had given up their knives for the effort and the Hladans were making light work of it. The first batch was almost ready. One of the Hladans carried a plate to a small knot of people seated around a fire. 

"That’s the leader, Jovic," Daniel supplied. 

Jovic was an old man easily in his sixties. His long gray hair and beard made him look like Santa Claus. 

Seated next to him, Colonel Jack O’Neill was waiting patiently for the ceremony to play its course. He was getting hungry and that stuff smelt great. 

The plate was handed to Teal’c who was seated on Jovic’s other side. They insisted he eat first. He took a bite of the steak presented and chewed. "It is good!" he declared. 

A cheer erupted from the Hladans and more plates were brought to the "top fire". The rest of the colony slowly formed an orderly queue, taking portions back into the complex to their relatives huddled in their tents. There was no panic, no huge sense of urgency. There was plenty to go around. By the time they returned the next batch was ready, now everyone was sitting around their fires and singing or chatting easily.

She hadn’t made it any further into the cavern. Gripped by an unconscious and irrational terror she had leaned against the wall and refused to move. She watched them come and go to the barbecue, her heart racing, her head swimming. She was turning whiter, though Daniel didn’t think that was possible. She wanted to run. She wanted to throw up. Oh God she wanted to be anywhere but here.

"Sam," Daniel whispered, taking her arm. "You can do this, Sam. Just come and sit with us, okay?"

"I feel sick," she said, holding herself round the middle.

"It’s just a smell, Sam. Look, Jack and Teal’c are over there, and I’m here too. Nothing’s gonna happen. We’re safe here, and look I brought the dictionary!" He dug the book out of his pocket and waved it at her. She didn’t smile at his joke. "It’s okay, come on." He urged again.

She straightened up slowly, and rubbed her hands over her face. She was getting hot. She pulled off her woolly hat and stuffed it in her pocket. Slowly she ruffled her hair and scanned the cavern again. _Get a grip, Carter_ she told herself. _It’s only lunch._ She looked at Daniel, he was patiently waiting for her to compose herself. He smiled at her and beckoned her to follow him. He reached out and took her sleeve. She let him lead her deeper into the cavern. She couldn’t help it as her eyes darted around looking for trouble, for threat, another way out. Daniel steered her to the top fire and introduced her to the chief. 

"Jovic," Daniel bowed deeply and Jovic returned it. "May I introduce another member of SG-1, this is Major Samantha Carter. Sam, this is Jovic, the Hladans’ Chieftain."

Still a little distracted she managed a polite smile and following Daniel’s lead bowed slightly.

"You are most beautiful," the Chief stood up. Sam tried to take a defensive step backwards but Daniel was right behind her. Jovic reached out and took her hand, gently raising to his lips. Daniel whispered something soothing to her and held her shoulders. Jovic released her hand. "Please join us."

Sam opened her mouth to make an excuse, but O’Neill pulled up a box and tapped it. "Take a seat, Major."

"It is a joyous day of deliverance and we must celebrate," Jovic called out.

"Yes, we must." O’Neill tapped the box again. Daniel sat down across form Jovic and looked at Sam. She hesitated. 

"Major?" O'Neill pressed. 

Daniel flinched, _Don’t push her Jack, she’ll bolt._

"Carter?" he tapped the box again and she started to sink down onto it. Teal’c smiled at her warmly, she smiled back. Daniel let out the breath he didn’t realize he was holding. She pulled her knees up and wrapped her arms round them protectively. She felt dizzy and tried to take some deep, cleansing breaths. Unconsciously she was rocking back and forth her body stiff with tension. 

"Carter," O’Neill tried to bring her out of it. "Jovic was telling us about the ventilation system in the cavern."

"Sir?" She glanced over at him, her eyes dark and glistening.

"Later!" Jovic boomed, making her jump. "Now it is time to eat!" He passed her a plate. "You must try some blago. Killed by your friend, the great Teal’c!" Teal’c inclined his head accepting the compliment. It sat on her lap, her hands lightly touching the rim of the plate. She stared at the meat and swallowed hard. It didn’t smell as strong as she had thought it would.

"It is delicious, Major Carter," Teal’c offered.

"Eat!" the chief almost pleaded. She felt dizzy, she felt guilty. They were starving and sharing their meal with them. She looked up at Daniel and Jack, they popped pieces into their mouths and started chewing. Danny raised his eyebrows at her. _It’s easy_ his eyes said. She glanced at Jovic. The chief looked like he would be offended if she didn’t eat some so slowly she forced her fingers to move. Fighting back one last wave of nausea, she bit into the hot steak and started chewing.

Daniel relaxed and O’Neill smirked at her. Once it was in her mouth her stomach took over. The nausea subsided and her stomach rumbled for more. It was the first roast meat she’d eaten in over a month. It tasted like lamb and beef at the same time. Teal’c was right, it was delicious. 

She smiled at them. Not a strained _I’m eating this but I hate it_ smile. More of a _Holy Hannah, I don’t believe that I’m actually doing this._ "It’s really good, Jovic," she smiled. "Thank you." She took another bite. Jovic looked pleased and turned to Daniel and started asking questions about Earth culture.

Jack let himself watch her for a few moments as she listened to Daniel and Jovic talk. Suddenly she was aware of his eyes on her. She made eye contact with him, he smiled and patted her arm, winking at her. The tension in her body was gone.

"Maybe you can answer that, Sam." Daniel suddenly pulled them from their private exchange. 

"Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t hear, Daniel. Answer what?"

"I am curious, you are the only female warrior here, Samantha. It is unusual for our women to be warriors unless they have lost their husband. Have you had such a loss?"

"No, sir, I chose to be a warrior. In our culture both men and women are free to choose their career path regardless of their family situation."

"Ah," Jovic nodded. "But I have also seen you in the caves with the boxes of light."

"Daniel?" she asked.

"You mean a computer, Jovic. You’ve seem Major Carter using a computer."

"Yes, Com-pu-teer. These are not weapons, but boxes of knowledge."

Sam smiled. "You’re right Jovic, I’m not just a warrior. I’m a scholar too. I’m working with the science team on the geology of the planet."

Jovic nodded slowly. "O’Neill, you are also a scholar?"

Daniel and Sam stifled a snigger. He shot them both a look and replied evenly, "I am a warrior and a leader, Jovic. I leave the science to these two. We work as a team."

Jovic nodded wisely. "A wise man knows his limits and uses the best of those around him. You are a wise man, O’Neill." Jovic bowed and O’Neill bowed back, giving the two smirking scientists a _there you go,_ look. Sam was now popping pieces of meat into her mouth like there was never anything wrong. Mostly she listened to Daniel and Jovic chatter and watched some of the dancing. She was starting to relax.

Fraiser let out a long and slow breath. She had watched Daniel bring Sam into the cavern. Watched her fight through the fear and join her friends. "Well done, Sam," she whispered, "cross it off the list." She slipped back into the tent and back to her patients.

**  
**

12

Major Sam Carter was happy again. She was glad she’d convinced Doc Fraiser to let her come on this mission. Okay, so she was going back to the SGC tonight, unlike the rest of SG-1 but at least she was here and she could come back in the morning. Lunch had been a great milestone. The smell of cooking meat was still wafting round the cave system. It didn’t bother her in the slightest anymore.

Max King was right. The naquadah deposits on this planet were rich and plentiful. Together they had checked their tests twice. They came back the same. "This is just amazing..." she muttered again.

"Coffee?"

Carter looked up, Daniel Jackson stood over her clutching a flask in his hand and some cups.

"Thanks, Daniel."

"So," he started, "you think this is for real then?"

"Yup," she smiled, "we’ve checked it so many times now it must be true."

"I told you, Major," King smirked, "but I knew you’d have to see it for yourself." 

Sam smiled at him and tapped a few keys on her computer. She took the offered cup.

Jackson pulled up a box to the small table they were sitting around. The laptop was churning away on a calculation, scrolling numbers across the screen. Sam and Max watched it intently and sipped their coffee. Daniel felt left out.

"So," he said, "having fun?"

"Sorry?" she hadn’t been listening.

"Silly question, I’ll come back later. Just don’t forget you’re due to leave in a couple of hours. Day pass, remember?"

She smiled and nodded, then the screen stopped scrolling they started reading, intently.

Daniel rose and wandered away. "She’s fine," he muttered to himself.

John Whitney was very much the new kid on the block. Most airmen waited over six months before getting their first mission. He just happened to be on duty at the right time, and he was an expert skier. Ferretti had liked that when he told him. Now, after just a few short months he was on his first new world. He was dizzy with the enormity of it all. The beauty of the mountain. _Mmmn, that mountain looks just like…_ Then he started to worry. He hadn’t realized how much the ground shook when the gate activated. He’d not felt it on Earth. Whilst he was outside helping move supplies he’d got a really good look at that mountain, and he didn’t like what he saw. But who should he tell? Who would believe him?

The rest of the special detachment to SG-2 were eating and relaxing. Whitney wanted to take another look at the snow, but the sentries had told him that without orders he’d have to go back inside the complex. There were animals out there, blago; bigger and nastier than polar bears. He wandered back and tried to think. Was he just worrying? No. 

At that point, Daniel Jackson brushed past him revealing Major Carter and Major King. Carter was fiddling with her computer. She’d listen. _Wouldn’t she?_

He knew he had to say something. He took a deep breath and walked over. "Major Carter?" he half whispered.

Carter looked up. "Yes, Airman?"

"Excuse me, ma’am, I was wondering if you could spare me a few minutes."

"What for?"

"I think we might have a problem." 

She sipped her coffee. "What kinda problem?"

"I can’t be sure without taking a closer look at the pack, but I think that the snow on the mountain slope might be unstable."

She raised her eyebrows. "What makes you think that?"

"There’s a slope just like it in Aspen, ma’am. I was on Ski Patrol there for four years. It’s not a classic av. slope but it went big time a couple of seasons ago. No one thought it would go, but it did."

"I’m sure SG-7 have thought about it, Airman?" she asked realizing she didn’t know his name.

"Whitney, ma’am. And I don’t think so, otherwise they would have looked at the layers. You can tell just by walking on the lower slope that there’s soft layer under the crust. If it’s like that further up we could have a real problem."

Sam looked at King. "Know anything about snow, Max?" she asked.

"Nope, and no one’s mentioned it to me."

Carter looked at the young man before her, he couldn’t be older than 20. He looked agitated, worried and at the same time sure of himself and what he was saying.

"What unit are you with?"

"Special detachment to SG-2, ma’am."

"Okay, grab your coat, let’s go."

"Sam?" King questioned.

"I need some air, Max. Whitney here is gonna escort me."

On the way out they passed Major Ferretti. "Major? Mind if I borrow one of your men?"

Ferretti glanced up. "Sure, Carter," he waved them away and went back to what he was doing.

"Come on, let’s go." Sam led the young man back through the tunnels to the outside. The SGC guards didn’t question her as they donned their skis and sunglasses and headed out into the valley.

O’Neill hadn’t been able to find her. Eventually he found Major King, who reluctantly told him where she’d gone. He headed straight for the cave entrance, steam coming out of his ears. Okay so she was feeling better, now she was getting cocky. He’d deal with King later. The guards confirmed they were outside. One of them had had the presence of mind to keep an eye on them and pointed to two small dots in the distance.

The slope started at the top of the mountain that towered above the gate. Beyond it, a third of the way up the mountain, the two figures had stopped. O’Neill pulled out his binoculars. They were cutting blocks of snow with their skis.

"What the hell are they doing?"

Daniel took the glasses. "Building an igloo?" he offered.

"Sierra Golf One-Two, this is Sierra Golf Niner."

The voice squawked in her ear piece. She turned, O’Neill waved. "Major Carter?"

"Here, sir," she waved back.

"What are you doing out there, Major?" O'Neill asked sarcastically.

"Sir, just checking something out." She sounded out of breath.

"This is an unauthorized excursion, Major." he growled. "Get your butts back here. Now!" 

"But sir..."

"Major," he warned, "what part of _now_ don’t you understand?"

"Yes, sir." She didn’t need to see his face to know he was mad at her. She turned off her mike. "We’ve gotta head back, Whitney."

"Just a minute, ma’am, I’m nearly done."

"The Colonel wants us back now." She leant over and fiddled with her Ski boots, stalling. "Hurry up."

Whitney finished the last cut into the pack and levered the block of snow with his ski. It fractured just where he expected. "Shit," he said. "Oh, sorry ma’am."

"Forget it. Were you right?" she asked.

"Yes, ma’am. We gotta stop them from activating the gate again, look." He pointed up to the mountain and traced a path with his hand. "It’ll probably start up there on that ridge. The ice will flow on top of the soft stuff right down the slope and into the valley." His arm traced the path and he ended up pointing at the Stargate.

"Major!" O’Neill’s voice barked in her ear piece causing her to flinch.

"Coming, sir," she called sweetly into her mike. She turned to Whitney. "We’re in trouble here, right?"

"Yes, ma’am. It would probably be going fast enough to bury or even wash away the gate."

"Get your gear, Whitney, we’ve gotta get back." _Before I get grounded for ever._

Whitney expertly clicked his skis back on and gathered up his pack. They started down the mountain.

Carter managed a passable stop in front of O’Neill. She was more tired than she dared admit, even to herself. It had been a long time since she’d been skiing and she was out of shape. "Sir," she started, taking off her sunglasses.

"Major, nice little field trip?" His voice was laden with sarcasm. He eyed Whitney carefully. "And who’s your new friend."

"Sir, this is Airman Whitney, he’s part of the SG-2 detachment."

"Really," he didn’t want to tell Carter off in front of a junior rank so he pulled her to one side and lowered his voice to a harsh whisper. "Just what the hell did you think you were doing out there? Don’t you remember the part in the briefing about the bears?"

"With respect, sir, the guards were watching us, we were armed and well, Whitney here, might have something. You should at least listen to him."

O’Neill glanced over at the young airman. He looked terrified. "Where’d you find him anyway?"

"He found me, sir."

"Budding scientist trying to impress you?" he asked with a hint of disgust.

"No, sir. Ex-Ski Patrol who thinks we have a problem with that mountain." She didn’t mean to snap but she wasn’t sorry it came out like that. 

O’Neill eyed him again. "Well," he said starting back toward Whitney and Daniel, "Anything that will drag Major Carter from naquadah samples must be important. Whitney?"

Whitney stood to attention. "Sir."

"Well, spit it out, Airman. What’s the problem?" Whitney’s eyes darted to Carter. She threw him a _tell him_ look. Whitney resumed his stance: "The mountain, sir. It’s an avalanche waiting to happen."

"Really?" he raised his eyebrows. "And what makes you think that?"

"Experience, sir. The pack’s unstable underneath with a crusty layer on top. Probably right from the top of the ridge down to the lower slope. The whole lot could go any time, sir"

"Really," he said skeptically.

"Sir," Carter interjected, "if it does go, the Stargate is in the way." 

O’Neill looked up at the ridge. There did seem to be a lot of snow up there. He looked from one to the other. Carter seemed to think there was something in it. Maybe the kid had something and maybe he didn’t but it wouldn’t hurt to check it out. "Okay, we got four hours before the day units are due home, get everyone inside. Whitney, I want a reasoned risk assessment in five minutes. We’ll meet in the main tent. Go." He motioned Sam to go with Whitney. "Carter, keep yourself and him outta trouble," he whispered to her. Fraiser would have his hide when she found out. Carter nodded and they slid off into the cave entrance. 

O’Neill took one last look at the mountain before trudging back to the cave. "Danny, Teal’c, gather up the unit commanders for me. I’m calling a pow-wow."

"Now don’t panic, Whitney, just take a few seconds to think it through."

"Ma’am." He was flustered, she had to calm him down.

"Just tell him what you think might happen and how. What you said outside was great, keep it simple." She placed a calming hand on his shoulder. "Just relax. He doesn’t really bite!" Whitney didn’t look convinced of that. O’Neill had a reputation on base.

"I’m sorry if I got you into trouble, ma’am." He really looked like he meant it.

She placed a comforting hand on his arm, "I’ve been in worse trouble before, Whitney, and I’m sure I will again. Let’s just concentrate on that slope, okay?"

"Yes, ma’am." He took a couple of deep breaths and looked intently at Carter’s computer screen showing the ’ UAV’s video of the mountain. He made a few notes on his pad and drew another picture. "Okay," he said, "I think I’m ready."

"Then let’s go." Carter led the young airman into the large main tent, already present were the team leaders of all the planet-side SG teams, and a few extras. 

"Okay, folks," O’Neill started, "Airman Whitney here thinks we have a problem." He waved Whitney forward. "Airman?"

"Yes, sir." He fumbled his notebook, recovered and took a deep breath whilst stealing a look from Carter who urged him on. "I believe that the Stargate is in the direct path of an avalanche zone."

That raised a few eyebrows. "What makes you think that?" Major Daziel asked, glancing quickly at his weatherman, Little, who shrugged. 

"Well, sir, I’m from Aspen and I grew up in the mountains, the slope out there is just like one that went in ‘98. It’s not really a classical av. zone, but I just knew there was something wrong. You see the angle’s right and Major Carter and I had a quick look at the snow layers on the lower slope and there’s an unstable layer beneath the crust." Fraiser darted an annoyed glance at Sam. _Thank you, Airman Whitney._ Carter half smiled and shrugged as Whitney continued. "If it collapses the whole lot could come down the mountain at 100 miles an hour plus, sweep down through the valley and bury or even dislodge the gate."

There were some muffled curses. "What could set it off?" Major Carter prompted him. 

"Ma’am, anything. I mean most avs are caused by the vibration from skiers, but earthquakes, loud noise, gun shots, bad weather, even an animal or bird landing on the wrong part of the pack and whoosh."

"Did you say vibration?" Daziel asked.

"Yes sir. This is my first trip through, sir, and I didn’t realize the Stargate caused so much vibration. And yes sir, that could set it off too."

"Wait a minute, I hate to be a cynic, ‘cos that’s really your job, Jack," Daniel started, "but we’ve already activated the gate several times from both ends to get us and all this stuff here. Nothing’s happened so far."

Sam shot Daniel a _Give the kid a break_ look that could have killed. O’Neill gestured his agreement with Daniel’s argument, handing the floor back to Whitney. 

"I said, _it could,_ sir, and the triggers depend on other stuff like the weather. That messes with the layers and what was a stable pack this morning becomes unstable. Every time the gate’s been activating, the layers are reacting to it. It’s moving, settling. It’s a time bomb, sir."

"Who’s unit are you with?"

"SG-2 detachment, Major Daziel. Special duty." Which meant he happened to be on duty when they were rounding up bodies for the humanitarian effort. Stackers and packers. 

Daziel looked at Ferretti. "He’s yours if you want him," Ferretti offered.

"Colonel, we don’t have anyone with avalanche experience on SG-7."

"Really?" O'Neill watched Daziel squirm. "Whitney, you just joined the science corps." Jack huffed and shook his head. "So we have a problem, what do we do about it?"

"Don’t activate the gate until we check out those snow layers," was Daziel’s simple answer. 

"Okay, but what if Hammond calls us," Ferretti asked blackly.

"Move the gate?" Daniel suggested. "I mean we’re sheltered in here right, so maybe we could move the gate inside."

"Carter?"

"Possible, sir, but it’s pretty heavy. We’d need a lot of men to move it. It’s a fairly long way and the snow’s pretty deep. We should move the DHD inside ASAP."

"Okay, engineering, have a think about that. Anything else?"

"Sir," Little offered, "I’m picking up a weather front that looks like it could cause a blizzard. It was heading away from us but it changed direction about ten minutes ago."

"Great. When will that hit us?"

"It’s moving pretty fast, sir, maybe in a few hours."

O’Neill considered the options. "Doc," he said, "how many personnel do we have on planet?"

"44 SGC personnel, Colonel. Twenty were due to return tonight with 100 of the most serious Hladans."

"How many we got stashed in here?" 

"Over 500, Colonel."

"Supplies?"

"Medical supplies for probably two days. Not quite enough blankets for everyone but we should double up anyway. As for food, we have maybe a day of MREs if we all stay. But we seem to be more efficient at killing those blagos, so we can easily go two days."

"Okay, let’s get prepped for a long night in. Daziel, Whitney, Little and Carter, get your heads together. I want to know how likely it is to go before we think about moving the gate. We’ve got just under four hours before we’re due to start sending personnel back. Hammond will be expecting us to call. If we don’t, he might call us anytime after that. Meet back here in an hour."

"Sir," Whitney piped up, "it might help if one of the Hladans could help us. Local knowledge is real important in av. predictions. Someone who knows the mountain, even just what the weather’s been like over the last couple of weeks."

"Daniel, see if you can find the local snow expert and take them to SG-7."

"On my way, Jack." He left.

"Doc, looks like we’ve got us a sleep over. Is there anything else you need?"

"I’ll get my team right on it, Colonel."

"Okay people, vacation’s over, let’s batten down those hatches, start saving fuel, and have everyone who’s got them fit their suppressers. Just in case one of those bear things pops up, no unsuppressed weapons outside... Dismissed."

They all filed out until only Fraiser, O’Neill and Teal’c remained.

"Something on your mind, Doc?" He braced himself for the onslaught.

"Yes," she said, carefully considering what she was about to say. "This mission just changed tack in a big way, Colonel. I’d prefer if you could keep a _closer_ eye on Major Carter. She’s not 100 percent yet." He took the admonishment. He needed Carter to help SG-7 and the kid sort this out. Besides he wasn’t done with her himself yet.

"She’ll be fine, Doc, this is just the sort of thing she thrives on."

"Don’t push her, Colonel. That’s an order."

His face softened. "Yes, ma’am."

Daziel trooped back to the SG-7 station with Whitney and Carter in his wake.

"Nice job, Airman," Carter said quietly. 

"Thank you, ma’am."

"Now you’ve got their attention, you gotta follow through."

"Ma’am?" Whitney was looking nervous again.

"Whitney," she stopped him. "Just relax, you’ve done the hard part. Daziel and his team will listen to you. Just tell ‘em what you know and do your job."

"What if I’m wrong?"

She hung her head in exasperation, and a little tiredness. "Whitney, if you are wrong, we all get to go home as planned and everyone will be happy. If you’re not, you’ve probably saved a lot of lives already. It’s called a win-win situation." He considered that.

"Come on," she said, "time to teach SG-7 something about avalanches."

It didn’t take long for SG-7 to welcome Whitney into their circle. A whole team of just scientists was Jack O’Neill’s nightmare command. Sam enjoyed double teaming him when they were working with them as much as she and Daniel did on regular missions. He usually shouted _Ah!_ at them and let them get on with it. 

Whitney settled in nicely. His father’s experience as the ski patrol's search and rescue team leader had been passed on faithfully to the young man. He recounted the technical details with fluidity and poise. Every now and then he’d look over to her for guidance, support. She always managed to smile and he’d carry on. Daziel and Little got their heads together, Daniel brought the local mountain guide and they delved deeply into the history of the mountain. 

It had happened several times in the past that this one man could remember. At similar times of year and triggered by unknown forces. Not much to go on but enough for Daziel to give O’Neill the bad news before his time was up. Daziel wanted to look at the layers himself, so he could really see what was going on. They started towards the cave entrance, but Sam held back and whispered to Daziel. "I’d better stay here," she said. "Be nice to Whitney."

"Sure. Are you okay, Carter?" Daziel asked. She looked a little pale to him but it could be the light.

"Fine," she lied, "I’m not sure the Doc or Colonel would be too pleased if I go outside again. I’ll hold the fort until you get back."

"You can make us a fresh pot of coffee then. See ya later." Daziel smiled and walked away.

Sam went back into the tent and flopped down in the only proper chair in the place. She was exhausted and she knew it. Teal’c entered the tent and stood solemnly in front of her. "Hi Teal’c," she managed brightly. "What can I do for you?"

Teal’c produced a rations pack and flask. He didn’t say anything. "Fraiser?" she asked. He smiled and set the packages down on the table in front of her. She started to open the box. "Are you joining me?" 

"Thank you, no, I have eaten already."

"Oh. Coffee?"

"It was not Doctor Fraiser’s intention that you share this meal with anyone. You require the full quota of nutrition for yourself."

"Geez, Teal’c, I was trying to be polite. Are you just gonna stand there and watch me?"

"I am."

She peeled off the top of one of the containers and stuck a fork into it. "Well, can you make yourself useful then, make a fresh pot of coffee for SG-7?" He nodded and set about the task keeping one eye firmly fixed on every mouthful she took. 

Field rations didn’t really taste that bad, once you got used to eating them every week. Fraiser had managed to select one of the least obnoxious combinations of dinners and it was hot. She was tired and hungry so the food and coffee hit the spot. 

By the time SG-7 got back she was refreshed. Teal’c silently cleared away the wrappers and served the coffee as SG-7 shivered their way into the tent, peeling off their outdoor gear. None of them looked happy.

"So guys," she said, "what have we got?"

"A god damned time bomb." Daziel spluttered. "There," he pointed to the cornice of the mountain on the UAV pictures. "That’s what’ll go. We’re gonna have to move the gate. Now."

**  
**

13

It was only thirty minutes since O’Neill’s pow-wow had ended. Daziel was back in the main tent, Carter, Little and Whitney behind him. "We’re gonna have to move it, and before Hammond dials us up."

"Danny..."

"Engineering, I’m on it." He scuttled out. Being Jack’s runner in times like these at least kept him busy. SG-11 had set up shop in the great main cavern, it was a bit of a trek so he jogged, wondering if someone was thinking about modifying the radios so that they would work throughout the cave complex. Least of their worries at the moment though.

The team leaders were soon all back in the main tent. O’Neill confirmed the bad news on the snow pack.

"So, let’s think about this, people. Hammond is gonna dial up and we can’t stop him, so we wait and we plan. When Earth calls us we have a wish list ready, anything you think we have on the base, that they can move through in that one 38 minute opening, that we’ll need and don’t have. We may only get this one chance so get your list to Doctor Jackson ASAP. Give stuff priorities ‘cos we might not be able to get everything we want in time. And everything’s gonna have to come through without personnel. I’m not prepared to put any more lives at risk right now."

"We could deliberately set it off, sir." Whitney said suddenly.

O’Neill glanced at Whitney in surprise. "Deliberately set it off?"

"Yes sir, it’s the best way to stop a big problem forming. You set off little snow flows regularly, and then big flows don’t get a chance to form."

"I thought you said we had a big problem here."

"Sir, we do, but if we moved the gate and then set it off, we could be reasonably sure it was safe outside."

"Okay, let’s worry about that when we’ve got ready. Lists people…. Now!"

Ten minutes later Daniel had finished compiling the lists on his laptop. O’Neill scanned the list carefully… All the expected stuff, food, a bunch of fairly specific medical supplies, some gadgets for the engineers, more fuel for the UAV, - he’d have to check up how much they had left – and…

"Who put ketchup on the list?" he exclaimed aloud. Daniel smirked. "Dammit, Daniel, this is serious!"

"I know, Jack, but several teams requested it so I thought I should put it down. Besides, if we’re gonna be eating a lot of blago, something to go with it will be a morale boost."

Carter sniggered in the corner. O’Neill glared at her before adding, "Personally I think a little mustard would go…"

They all smiled. "Okay Danny. You’ll need to be ready with this when Hammond calls."

"Shouldn’t be for a few more hours."

"Let’s check on SG-11 and the DHD, then get something to eat," O’Neill added. Carter looked at her watch. "Yes, it is that time already. Aren’t you hungry?" he asked.

"Not really, sir, I only ate an hour ago."

"Major Carter had an MRE," Teal’c supplied, lest O’Neill not believe her.

"Well, you’ll not put on any weight eating those things, come on."

She opened her mouth to protest, but the look on his face said he wasn’t taking no for an answer. She followed him out of the tent. "Colonel," she called to his back.

"What is it, Major?" he stopped suddenly and she almost ran into the back of him.

"Sir," she started, "I…"

"Spit it out, Carter."

"Sir, I appreciate what you’re trying to do, but you don’t have to treat me like a child."

He shifted his weight, and eyed his second in command carefully. "Sorry, kid," he said finally, then realized what he’d said. He waved his arms defensively. "Sorry, Carter. I didn’t mean to say that. I just, well I know _I’m_ having a hard time staying warm. You burn a lot of energy and you need to eat nearly the whole time."

"I know, sir."

"So what’s the problem?"

Sam hung her head, exasperated.

"Sam," Daniel interrupted, "I know you’ve eaten already, but would you join us for a little supplemental snack? Maybe dessert?"

"Dessert?"

"Well, I think we have blago, blago or MREs on the dessert menu tonight." He smiled sweetly.

"I’m sure I could rustle up a real snow cone." O’Neill quipped, waggling his eyebrows at her.

"Okay, but I’m really not hungry." She moved off towards the cavern and the barbecue. They followed in her wake, Jack and Daniel exchanging glances.

"You need to refine your Sam management skills, Jack."

"Sam Management?"

"Jack, you have to let her be responsible for herself."

"I’m her CO, I give her orders, she obeys them."

Daniel shook his head. In front of them, Sam had stopped dead in her tracks, her hand on her stomach. "You guys go on, I’ll handle this."

Sam leaned against the wall, tilting her head back and breathing deeply.

"Sam?" Daniel approached her slowly as Jack and Teal’c slipped past them.

"It’s strong…" she managed.

"Yeah. The smell is pretty strong."

"Feel sick."

"You did it today already, Sam, you pushed it away… It wasn’t so bad was it?"

"No," she muttered trying to remember how nice it felt to sit with her team-mates round the fire again. "Not so bad."

_  
_

Carter you’re making a fool of yourself. Just go eat for crying out loud.

Daniel had his hand round her shoulder. She rubbed her face. "This is ridiculous," she muttered, chiding herself.

"Come on," Daniel tugged lightly on her sleeve, she followed him slowly.

_  
_

Did it this morning, can do it again… No big deal, it’s dinner.

Fraiser was sitting by one of the fires, eating. Daniel guided Sam over to her.

"Hi, Sam!" she greeted.

"Hi," Sam managed.

"You sit here, I’ll be back." Daniel scuttled away.

"Sure." Sam crumpled onto a box and drew her knees up, wrapping her arms around them. She glanced at Janet. "Before you ask, I feel sick. I know I shouldn’t, but I do."

"Take some deep breaths, through your mouth. Here," she handed her a canteen, "sip some water."

"It’s not like I haven’t eaten already…" she complained. "They’re intent on fattening me up."

"You do need to put some weight back on, Sam. We talked about that, didn’t we?"

"I don’t need to put it all on today, do I?"

Janet smiled. "I’ll have a chat with them. They’re only trying to help."

"I know, but they’re trying too hard!"

Daniel had joined Jack and Teal’c in line for the barbecue, he was stealing nervous glances in her direction. Sam blew out a long, slow breath. "Look at ‘em." Fraiser did. "This isn’t gonna go on forever is it?"

"Sam, just roll with it, talk to them. Tell them if they’re making you uncomfortable." Daniel smiled at her from across the cavern. She smiled back.

"Aw shit, this is the exact opposite of what I thought would happen. I thought they’d be so mad they’d never speak to me again. But they just won’t leave me alone. I can’t sneeze without one of them asking if I’m okay, like I’m gonna shatter into a million pieces or something."

"You gave them quite a scare, Sam, they’re being cautious."

"Being pains in the ass, more like." 

Fraiser smirked.

"What?"

"Still feel sick?"

"No," she replied without thinking. Then she smiled a thin smile, and shook her head. "They make me so mad sometimes."

Fraiser smiled. "The feeling’s mutual. Now, here they come."

"Sam, you okay?" Daniel asked insistently.

Sam threw up her arms.

"Sam?"

"Daniel, stop panicking and sit down," Fraiser ordered.

"Sorry." He squatted down with the two plates.

"I – am – fine! **F – I – N – E FINE!** "

"Oh," Daniel managed, holding out one of the plates. She took it, and not quite knowing how, demolished the lot. They looked on approvingly, until she glared at each one in turn.

The conversation turned to whether mustard or ketchup would go better with blago. As they sipped their coffee, Sam wondered quietly to herself if she was pleased about the potential of having to stay here. She wasn’t sure her current sleeping patterns would be sociable enough, and it was cold. Her nice warm bed back at the SGC was calling her. This was going to be a long day.

**  
**

14

Everyone was inside. The DHD had been moved to the cave entrance. It still worked. Carter had insisted they try and lock a chevron to make sure. Now all they had to do was wait.

* * * * *

Hammond paced his office and looked out over the gate room. It had been a busy time preparing for the influx of Hladan refugees, but everything was nearly ready and the off world SG teams were not due back for another hour. They would be ready.

The klaxon sounded. "Off world activation!" Sergeant Davis called out.

Hammond bolted down the stairs into the control room.

"Who is it, Sergeant?" he barked. "The day units aren’t due back yet."

"We’re getting an iris code now, sir. It’s the Tok’ra!"

"Open the iris."

The metal iris slid open revealing the shimmering event horizon. Through it stepped two figures. A broad smile spread across Hammond’s face and he bolted for the gate room.

* * * * *

A light snow was starting to fall. The wind had picked up a little, Paxman shivered against it. It was going to be a long watch. He tried not to just stare out at the gate, the sun hadn’t lost any of its intensity and he was glad of his sunglasses. The Stargate was the only feature in the valley. He had to stay alert, those blago were still about. The Hladans insisted that there were many blago in the area. They blended so well with the snow it was difficult to see them from a long way off.

"Jimmy," he started, "When is your wife due?"

"Three days…" James Taylor let his mind wander to back home. Sally had had a rough time the last few weeks. If he didn’t make it back for the big event his mother-in-law would never, ever, forgive him.

"First kid, huh?" 

"Yeah," Jimmy let himself smile, he was looking forward to being a dad. "I was supposed to go on leave," he looked at his watch, "two hours ago." He shook his head sadly. "How the hell am I gonna explain this to her mother. Even if I could tell her the truth, she wouldn’t believe me! I’m toast."

"We’ll have to think about that one, maybe Ferretti can come up with something, he’s used to doing stuff like this." His friend nodded, unconvinced. "Hey, we were lucky to get picked, Jimmy. Some guys have been on base for years and never gated."

"I know, but right now I could just be happy standing post in the briefing room. Nice and warm, no wildlife and home time almost guaranteed. Man this is a crazy posting."

"Nothing like it on Earth, Jimmy." They both laughed. 

"‘To explore strange new worlds…’"

"‘Seek out new life forms and civilizations…’"

"‘To boldly go…’" Their chorus was interrupted by the distinct rumble and clank of the gate. The chevrons started glowing. 

"Jimmy!" Paxman screamed, "it’s activating!" His partner bolted back into the cave to get O’Neill.

Paxman brought his binoculars to his eyes and his radio to his mouth. The ground shook, the vortex splurted from the gate and collapsed back leaving the shimmering event horizon. He started talking into the radio as instructed. The rumble from the gate was replaced by another more sinister sound. He glanced up. The snow pack was cracking.

"Do not, repeat, do not send any personnel through the gate," he paused. Two figures clad in SGC parkas stepped through. "Oh shit!"

O’Neill skidded to a halt at the entrance.

"Dammit! I said…" he froze. The cracks were widening. The rest of SG-1 and SG-7 bumped up behind him and watched, horrified, as the pack suddenly lost its cohesion and started the long slip down the mountain.

O’Neill grabbed the radio. "Hammond, this is O’Neill, do not, repeat, do not send through any more personnel. The area is not secure. We are in an avalanche zone."

The two figures, oblivious to the danger, waved jauntily to the gathered knot of SG personnel and started over towards them down the path one of them almost running.

"O’Neill, this is Hammond, we just sent through General Carter and Martouf." O’Neill glanced back at Carter as she broke from the knot and ran out into the valley screaming at her father and pointing upwards. Martouf stopped and turned first.

It was flowing down the mountain, picking up speed. The roar was increasing. Martouf called out to Jacob, but they were already twenty yards apart. He turned, looked at Martouf, the mountain and then back at Sam. Martouf started looking for the DHD.

Carter turned and screamed. "SEND THEM BACK!" 

"General shut down the gate we need to re-dial!"

The gate hissed shut, Martouf looked back to the cave entrance, confused.

Daniel frantically slapped the DHD symbols. The vortex spluttered from the gate as Martouf bolted back towards it, pointing the GDO and sending the iris code.

Jacob hesitated, the curtain of white was getting closer, he knew he wasn’t going to make it back to the gate in time. He looked back at his daughter.

"DAD!" she screamed. Teal’c was beside her now, he tried to lead her back to the shelter of the entrance, she shrugged him off and started forwards instead. He plucked her off her feet and hoisted her over his shoulder as she screamed out.

O’Neill was barking down the radio, "We’re trying to get them back to you, leave the iris open." 

Martouf paused in front of the gate looking back at Jacob. They were only fifty yards apart now. The rumble was getting louder. He stole a look behind the gate, the snow nearly upon him, the noise was deafening, but against it he heard Jacob shout "GO!" He took one last look and jumped back through. The snow hit the base of the gate and flowed relentlessly around the edges. Jacob resumed running along the well trodden path to the cave, stealing glances over his shoulder.

"General," O’Neill shouted over the increasing noise, "Don’t call us, we’ll call you!"

The base of the gate gave way to the tons of snow pressing against it and started shifting down the valley. The snow and ice flow continued its relentless hammering. Slowly, it tipped backwards and flopped down. The snow poured over it like it wasn’t there, some of it funneling though the open portal.

"Shit! Close the iris!" O’Neill barked down the radio. He didn’t get a reply. The gate disappeared completely from view in the billowing clouds of snow. The noise was deafening.

Teal’c dumped Carter back on her feet and kept a tight hold of her as she spun round, trying to head back up the trail. "DAD!" she screamed again. 

It was moving even faster now, and he couldn’t run fast enough. The roar grew in his ears until the leading edge caught up with him 50 yards from the safety of the cave entrance.

"NOOOO!" her scream echoed as the flow washed over him. It pushed onwards funneling itself through the valley. As Whitney had predicted the flow coursed past them, sweeping everything a mile onto the valley floor. 

Suddenly the rumble subsided and everything fell silent.

"LET ME GO!" she fought in Teal’c’s grasp. He released her and climbed up the edge of the flow after her, quickly followed by the gathered SG teams. Whitney shouted at Paxman to fetch poles from Engineering and get Fraiser, then he climbed up onto the flow and looked around. The landscape was completely white. There were no landmarks, no sign of the gate and no sign of Jacob.

**  
**

15

Carter was running as best she could, sinking to her knees with every step. She didn’t know how but she knew he was out there, she knew she could find him, she would feel him if only she could get close enough.

"Dad!" she called hopefully, "DAD!".

Suddenly she stopped, and looked around.

"Major Carter!" Teal’c was beside her.

"He’s here," she said, "I don’t know how, but I know he’s here." She could feel him calling out to her in her mind he was... "Over there!" she started moving again, further down the valley. She stopped again, moved a few yards away and fell to her knees, digging desperately into the snow.

O’Neill, Daniel and Teal’c slipped in beside her. "He’s here, I can feel it," she gasped. They started pulling at the compacted snow with their hands, digging down, throwing the snow over their shoulders and between their own legs. "Dad, we’re coming," she was shouting. Whitney dropped shovels into the hole, they grabbed them and carried on digging. They worked in silence except for Sam’s constant calling. Her hands were starting to hurt, but she kept going, desperate, driven, determined.

The white gave way to the dark gray-blue of an SGC parka. "DAD!" she called again.

They cleared the snow from around him, pulling back the hood of the parka, his face was bloodied. He looked dead. Carter slumped back against the little mountain they’d built themselves. Held her head in her arms and screamed in anguish.

"He’s alive Sam!" O’Neill could feel a pulse. "Let’s get the rest of him out."

There were men all around now. Pulling at the snow and tugging Jacob from his icy tomb. Fraiser appeared in the middle and started barking orders.

Daniel went to Sam’s side and wrapped his arm round her to stop her falling over. She was crying openly, tears flooding down her pink cheeks. "Dad?" she half whispered.

Daniel pulled her closer and held her tightly. "We’ve got him Sam, we’ve got him."

She was shaking, her teeth started chattering. She seemed frozen stiff as the men pulled Jacob out and placed him on a stretcher. Teal’c took one end with O’Neill and Whitney on the other, Fraiser hovered beside it as they headed back to the cave. Daniel helped pull Sam out of the hole and led her after the others. 

Suddenly she felt dizzy, sick and everything blurred. She stumbled and fell, Daniel hoisted her up and tried to drag her back. Two more airmen appeared with Ferretti, who pulled her over his shoulder and carried her back to the caves. 

Daniel picked his way after them, breathing hard and brushing the fallen snow from his hair. He wrapped his arms around his body and shivered as he walked. Neither of them had had time to put on their extra coats. The wind bit into him and the snow had started to fall harder. He glanced back and couldn’t see the hole, just white. Pure, bright, blinding white. An airman pulled on his sleeve urging him onwards. Behind he heard the roar of a blago. His legs found an extra speed. A few seconds later he heard a blood curdling roar and muffled gunshots as he crashed back into the relative warmth and safety of the cave. 

* * * * *

"Dammit, why didn’t you put your coats on!" Fraiser snapped as Ferretti carried in Carter. Her clothes were dark and obviously wet from melted snow.

"Wasn’t time, Doc, we just ran," O’Neill defended his team. 

"Ran yourselves into a whole lotta trouble. Get those wet clothes off, right now. Jason, temps."

"I am able to compensate for the temperature, Doctor Fraiser. I will have no ill effects," Teal’c informed her. 

Fraiser leant over Jacob and listened to his chest. She wasn’t sure what she should do for him. Selmak should be able to handle whatever had happened inside, but he clearly needed warming up. Jason read the thermometer after it beeped. "92, ma’am."

"Teal’c, get over here," Fraiser ordered, "I need you to warm up Jacob."

"Yes, Doctor." He peeled off his outer clothing as Fraiser maneuvered Jacob into a sleeping bag.

"Ferretti," O’Neill barked, "make sure everyone’s still inside. I don’t wanna find out we’ve lost someone in that mess out there." 

The nurse stuffed the thermometer in O’Neill’s ear. _Beep_. "97-8" he called out.

"Sam, you okay over there?" Fraiser asked. She was sitting on a box in the corner, too cold to shiver, her teeth chattered as she spoke. "Dad… I’m cold."

"Hold still, Major." Jason inserted the probe in her ear.

O’Neill knelt in front of her. "It’s okay, Carter. We’ve got to get this wet stuff off you, that’s why you’re cold." 

_  
_

Beep. "93-6!" 

"Jason, I need you over here. Colonel, she needs to get warm and dry, now." 

"Carter? Can you help me get this stuff off you?" Her hand moved slowly to the zipper on her light jacket. Her hands were numb and she couldn’t grip. Jack reached up and pulled it down. "All right Carter, I’ll help, okay?"

She nodded slowly, her eyes clouding over and bobbing shut. "Dad," she whispered.

"Your dad’s gonna be fine, let’s get you nice and warm again, huh?" He pulled off the jacket and was relieved to find her top was dry. He draped a blanket round her shoulders and stooped to undo her boots. "Carter, you’re gonna have to stand up, kid." He half pulled her to her feet. He hesitated. "Doc?" he didn’t want to go any further. 

"Sam," Fraiser called, "you need to take your fatigues off, honey, we’ll get you some dry ones. Sammy! Can you do that?"

She nodded slowly, her hands moving to the belt and buttons, but she couldn’t grip. "Too cold, sir…" she said weakly.

"Is it okay if I do it?" At her nod, he unclipped her belt and released the buttons and zipper. He had to stoop to pull the fatigues down. She rested her hands on his back as he helped her step out of them. 

She stared distantly at her father. "Dad…" she murmured.

"All right, Carter, nearly done." 

Fraiser appeared at her side. "Turn around, Colonel, and get that stuff off as well." 

"Oh, I’m dry under here," he assured her, "nice and toasty warm."

"Then you’re just the man she needs. Get your outside gear off and get in that bag over there." Fraiser pulled off Sam’s wet thermals and dried her off with a towel. Jason returned with dry replacements and helped support the bewildered woman as Fraiser dressed her, complete with woolly hat. Then she steered Sam to the bag with O’Neill. Sam climbed in without hesitation. "Oh, sir," she said sleepily, "you’re so warm…"

O’Neill wrapped his arms around her in the bag as she wriggled into him. "Sweet." He paused as her body leeched heat from him. "Major, you’re an ice cube."

"Sorry sir," she mumbled.

Fraiser took her temperature again. She examined the readout critically just as Paxman brought in a shivering Daniel Jackson. "Found him outside, ma’am."

Fraiser threw up her arms. "Do you guys have any brain cells between you?" Daniel looked drenched from head to foot. His glasses had steamed up so he had to look over them at her as he stood shaking, his arms wrapped tightly round himself. 

"Oops."

"I’ll give you _oops_. It’s not like I don’t have enough to do here already." Fraiser shook her head. "Jason, sorry." Jason unzipped his own jacket as Fraiser advanced on Daniel. 

Within minutes of coming off the flow, they were all snuggled up in her medical tent. 

Teal’c reported Jacob’s temperature was rising steadily. O’Neill and Carter looked very comfortable and Sam was dozing peacefully. Daniel and Jason managed to get a little acquainted before Daniel nodded off as well.

Fraiser sat on a box in the middle of the tent and just looked at them. No one else on the flow had managed to get themselves that cold and wet. _What the hell did they think they were doing?_ Her eyes fell on Jacob and then his daughter sleeping sounding in the arms of her CO. _No time. Now there’s plenty of time._

* * * * *

Martouf was caught in his own mini avalanche. After jumping through the gate and arriving safely in the embarkation room, he was swept down the ramp by a funnel of snow and ice.

Hammond had been torn as to if he should close the iris. Where was Jacob? Then he heard O’Neill shout and gave the order. Jacob must still be there. Medics were called and the marines on guard starting digging in the snow.

* * * * *

Ferretti came back and reported everyone was inside during the avalanche. No further casualties. The sun was setting and the blizzard had gotten worse. Jimmy and Paxman had shot another blago which they had brought inside to the main cavern. _Breakfast,_ O’Neill mused. He wanted to call a meeting with the unit commanders but Fraiser wouldn’t let him leave, so they came to the medical tent and discussed their options.

"There’s no sign of the gate at all, we’re gonna have to find where it is before we try and dig it out," Daziel informed him. "The blizzard’s gonna make everything look different and could add a few extra feet of snow by morning. We’ll have to wait and see. Whitney’s put out some pole markers so we’ll be able to tell how deep the fresh layer is."

"Are we at risk of another avalanche any time soon?"

Whitney shook his head. "I doubt it ,sir. Maybe in a couple more days, or if the blizzard gets worse but it wouldn’t go so far. We’re safe on the flow for the moment."

"How deep is it right now?"

"‘About twenty feet, sir," Whitney said quietly.

"And the gate’s at the bottom?"

"Probably."

"Okay, so, bright ideas for finding it?"

"Sir," Max King spoke up, "we might be able to find it with the survey instruments, they pick up the EM field of the naquadah."

The body in his arms shifted and a whisper escaped. "No, Max."

"Carter?" O’Neill shook her a little. "Why, no?"

She didn’t open her eyes, just buried herself deeper into him. "Ore," she whispered. 

King understood. "She’s right, the ore is too pure, it’d be like looking for a needle in a pile of pins with a magnet. Too much interference."

She nodded. 

"Sam, you got any bright ideas?" O’Neill asked her.

"Dial up. Like Eddora."

O’Neill looked confused. "Yes, Carter," Daziel agreed, "that’ll probably work."

Jack shot Daziel the look he normally reserved for Sam. _How?_

"Sir, when the Eddoran gate was buried the molten naquadah formed an iris over the gate. The particle beam generator Major Carter built super heated some of the naquadah and formed a tiny cavity of gas just big enough to let the vortex form. When we re-dialed real quick the gas let the vortex expand and that formed the cavity Teal’c went into."

"Okay," O’Neill got most of that. 

"Well, sir, snow's not solid, there should be enough space for the vortex to start forming and this time the gate’s not that deep so the vortex should punch through the surface. All we have to do then is dig it out, and that’s your problem, Gilbert." 

Major Gilbert smiled. "We’re working on a plan for righting the gate now, sir. We’re gonna need to get some trees and build some sort of lift but we can do it. We’ll need bodies to help, but it’s do-able."

O’Neill relaxed. So they had a plan, the area was fairly safe and no one was seriously hurt.

"Okay so we dial up, and see where that gets us." His officers nodded in agreement.

Fraiser jumped in before they could further their plans. "We can’t do much in this storm, Gentlemen, and I am not prepared to risk more hypothermia cases or injuries from those blago. It’s been a long and trying day, I suggest we all settle down and get some rest." It wasn’t a suggestion, and her stare at O’Neill indicated she’d pull medical rank on him if he didn’t go along.

"Doc’s right, we got a lot to do tomorrow, there’s no immediate rush so let’s hunker down. Ferretti, can you organize the watches, make sure everyone gets a good six hours sleep. Leave SG-7 and 11 off the rota. I want your guys clear headed tomorrow." Daziel and Gilbert nodded.

"Good job today, people. We’re not in bad shape. Dismissed." They started to leave. Whitney hovered by the door. "Whitney?" O’Neill called him over.

"Sir?"

"Come here, son. We need to have a chat. Pull up a box." 

Whitney did as he was told and sat stiffly, looking at Carter’s sleeping face. "You saved a lot of lives today kid. We couldda had hundreds out there."

Whitney nodded. "Sir," he paused. He was looking at his second in command. 

"She’ll be fine in the morning, Whitney, she just got a little cold."

"Sir, Major Carter shouldn’t have got hypothermia so quickly, is she still sick?"

"She’s just tired, Airman," Fraiser interrupted, "she needs some rest."

"Yes, ma’am."

"Whitney, you did good son, you spoke up and made us listen. I like that in a man."

Whitney managed a half smile. "Thank you, sir, but it was Major Carter who you listened to."

He was right. "Somehow you don’t strike me as the kinda guy who would have taken no for an answer, Whitney."

Whitney smiled. "With this, sir? Probably not."

"Well we all lucked out then. You’re gonna have to check that slope in the morning, so clear off and get some shuteye."

"Yes sir." Whitney rose and left.

Fraiser flopped into a chair she had scrounged from SG-11. "Doc?"

"Yes, Colonel," she replied tiredly. 

"You got yourself a sleeping buddy yet?"

"Yes, Colonel, I do."

"They must be lonely, Doc." He smiled at her. "I’ll keep an eye on things in here for you, get some rest."

She rose from the chair checked all their temperatures one last time and left the tent. 

* * * * *

She was laying in his arms facing away from him. It started slowly just odd movements. She moaned once or twice, so quietly he would have hardly noticed if she wasn’t so close.

He knew what was happening. He removed his arms to see if that would help, but it didn’t. The movements became jerkier. Suddenly she twisted completely around, thrashing in the bag. There wasn’t room with two inside and she was kicking him. Kicking him pretty hard. The moaning was getting louder. Fearing she’d wake the whole tent and do some serious damage to him he gently shook her awake.

She gasped as he brought her back to consciousness.

"Carter," he whispered, "it’s okay, just a nightmare."

He rubbed her arms reassuringly as she took some deep breaths trying to push the images from her mind. She was losing. She turned over and covered her face with her arm. 

"Carter?"

"Sir?" she breathed.

"Do you wanna talk about it?"

She shook her head under her arm.

"Okay," he felt awkward, in the way. He figured she wanted to be alone for a while. Not easy when you’re sharing a sleeping bag with your CO. "I should go check on things," he whispered. "You be okay here for half an hour?" She nodded, still under her arm. "Okay."

He got out and piled the blankets back over her. She hardly moved. She was hiding from him.

"You want anything? Coffee? Drink? Midnight snack?" he asked, putting his outside clothes back on. She sniffed and shook her head again.

"Okay, I’ll be back in about half an hour." 

He moved to the door and glanced back. She curled into a tight ball burying her head under the blankets. She was shaking, crying. But she didn’t want him to see her like that and he had no right to loiter. He checked his watch and left.

Ferretti was still up. He was keeping the troops occupied, alert. 

"Morning, Major, how’s the weather?"

"Been getting worse, sir. Take a look if you like, but there’s not much to see."

O’Neill zipped up his jacket and popped his head out the cave entrance. The snow was falling heavily and a strong wind was blowing the loose snow around in an impenetrable blizzard. He went back inside and brushed the snow from his hair. "Sweet."

"I was just about to turn in, Colonel. These guys are the new watch." O’Neill nodded to them. "Stay sharp, kids, those blago might be looking for shelter." 

"Yes sir," they replied, in unison.

O’Neill signaled Ferretti to follow him back into the complex. "How’s everyone holding up?" 

"Good, sir, we’ve got another watch planned for four hours time, they should see the sun rise. Everyone else is tucked up snug as a bug."

"Good work, Louis," he noticed the lights were off in SG-11’s and SG-7’s tents. "You even got the techies to bed." 

Ferretti smiled. "Except for Whitney, sir." Ferretti pointed to a small fire still burning in the center of the cave. Two men were huddled around it, they were kneeling on the floor, clearly working on something. 

"What the hell? I told him to get some sleep. He’s gonna have to check the flow in the morning and…"

Ferretti laid a hand on his CO’s arm. "Aren’t you gonna ask what they’re making?" 

"Making?"

"Come on, I’ll introduce you to Whitney’s new friend."

The two officers made their way through the debris of lifeless fires to the two hunched figures. Whitney was laughing. The other man was slightly older, his hair long, face thin and drawn with a scrawny beard. "One of the Hladans?" Jack asked.

"Yes sir, Jovic’s son, Jannik. You met him this afternoon."

As the two officers approached, Jack noticed there were bones and pieces of hide lying in odd piles around them. Whitney held up his effort. Jannik laughed. "It is better than the first and they will do the job, John, but…"

"Jannik, Whitney?" Ferretti said. The young man bolted to attention as Jannik bowed slightly to O’Neill.

O’Neill waved Whitney down. "As you were Whitney. Whatcha doing?"

"Sir, making a pair of snow shoes, sir." He held them up. "Well trying to…" What looked like blago rib bones had been tied together with blago hide stretched over the frame and laced tight. One looked less rickety than the other.

Jannik smiled. "This one requires more work."

"Thought I told you to get some sleep, Whitney."

"Sorry sir, couldn’t sleep. Figured I might as well do something useful. These will come in handy out there, sir. I was thinking, that’s why Major Carter got so wet. The snow was too soft, she just sunk in. We should probably all make some, sir. Jannik here showed me their bone store. They don’t take long."

Whitney handed his second effort to O’Neill. 

"You’ve probably got something there, Whitney, but right now it’s sack time. And this time I’m making it a direct order. Got that?"

"Yes, sir." He turned to Jannik and bowed slightly. "Thank you, Jannik, can we continue in the morning?"

Jannik returned the bow. "We shall." He nodded to the two officers and started back to his family’s tent. Whitney acknowledged the officers himself and went back to his own tent, taking his newly constructed snow shoes with him.

O’Neill sank down onto a box and warmed his hands on the fire. Ferretti joined him. "Where did you find that kid, Louis?"

"Just hanging out at the SGC, sir, like most of em."

"How are they doing?" Ferretti considered his CO’s question. The special detachment had been assembled at very short notice. They had all been at the SGC for a few months, but none of them had gated and, had circumstances not necessitated their quick deployment, most of them probably never would have. 

"Good, sir, they’re all taking it pretty well."

"Any problems?"

Ferretti shook his head. "Not right now, but I have a storm brewing for when we get back."

Jack raised his eyebrows. "How so?"

"Taylor, sir. He has what can best be described as a domestic disaster waiting to happen. I assigned him to the day unit because his wife’s just coming to term and he has the mother-in-law from hell. Thinks he and the Air Force are not good enough for her daughter. She’s had a rough time with the baby, been in hospital for a while. He’s supposed to be on leave for the birth, like now."

"Oops."

"Yeah, he asked me if I could come up with a plausible cover story for him."

Jack smiled despite himself. "Sounds like the type that wouldn’t believe the truth even if he could tell her."

"Something like that."

"Okay, we’ll deal with that when we get back. Anything else?"

"Nope, everyone’s pulling together. We got ourselves a pretty good set up here."

"Good…" O’Neill’s eyes drifted back to the medical tent.

"Sir?"

"Yeah?"

"Is Major Carter okay?"

"Sure, Louis, she just got a little cold, she’ll be fine."

"That’s not what I meant, sir. She’s been kinda distant lately." Ferretti gazed at his CO who shook his head. _Don’t ask me that!_

"Sorry, sir, none of my business. If you’ll excuse me I’ll turn in." O’Neill nodded and Ferretti slipped away. 

O’Neill remained at the fire staring deeply into the flames. He checked his watch, it was two a.m., he’d been away for twenty five minutes. Slowly he wandered back to the tent. Daniel and Jason were soundly asleep. Teal’c and Jacob were both out for the count. She turned as he entered the tent. He smiled and squatted down by the cot. "Okay, Major?" her eyes were red and puffy, she nodded.

"Yes, sir. Thanks."

"The blizzard’s gotten worse, we can’t do anything until the morning. You should get some sleep."

"You too, sir. Sorry if I kicked you, I…"

"It’s okay, Carter, no harm done." He bounced on his heels. "You want me to find another buddy?"

She shook her head, smiling. "No sir, I’m freezing already." She started moving the blankets off the top of her and unzipping the bag.

"Okey dokey." He peeled off the thick thermal gear and slipped back into the bag with her. She immediately snuggled her back into his warm body.

"Sorry I woke you earlier, sir," she whispered. 

"Not your fault, Major. I know what it’s like. Do you wanna talk about it?"

She shrugged and the silence settled. They could hear Daniel snoring softly, the crackle from the fire in the cavern. He thought she’d drifted off to sleep when she started whispering, "They kept shouting at me, sir, like they wanted to know something. I just didn’t know what it was. Then they got really mad. When I figured out what they were up to I tried to fight them. They just kept on at me. The harder I fought the harder they kicked. It hurt so bad I thought I wasn’t gonna make it. So I stopped. I just stopped fighting and let them do what they wanted to do."

"Carter?"

"I _let_ them rape me," her voice was breaking. "I just gave in and let them do that to me. I could have kept fighting, but I just gave in."

O’Neill fought the wave of nausea and disgust that surfaced again. She had been right, he would have done something stupid. The anger burned deeply within him. She didn’t need that. Not now. "If you had kept fighting, Carter, what do you think would have happened?"

She shrugged, wiping her eyes again on the blanket.

"They probably would have beaten you to death, Major. I’ve watched men die like that and I don’t recommend it."

"Sir?"

He rubbed her arms gently. "Iraq, Carter. I lost some good friends like that and I almost lost myself. They’re all the same, Major, they’ll try and get to you anyway they can, try and break you."

"I know, sir." 

"You’re a survivor, Carter. You did what you had to do to survive that place. Just like the rest of us. And we won, cos we all came home. We all survived." She nodded considering his words.

"I can’t tell Daniel," she whispered, "I don’t think he’d understand."

"Danny’s a survivor too, Carter. He’s had more than his fair share of lousy experiences but he keeps going. He’s still with us. He’s a survivor too, don’t write him off. He cares about you a lot. We all do."

"I know."

There were a few moments of silence.

"Thank you, sir"

He squeezed her gently. "You’re welcome, Major." 

"Good night, sir." She pulled the blankets tightly around them.

"Good night, Major," he said, closing his eyes. "Sweet dreams."

**  
**

16

She drifted awake, aware of the dim light and soft warmth behind her. She turned slowly, coming face to face with her CO. The memories came flooding back and she leaned over to see if her father was awake too. Her eyes met in the darkness with the burly Jaffa.

"Hey, Teal’c," she said sleepily, "is he still asleep?"

Teal’c nodded. "He is, Major Carter, though he woke briefly in the night. Selmak is quite weak and his recovery may take some time."

Carter wanted to get up and go to him, but Jack had wrapped his arms round her and she didn’t think she could extract herself without waking him up. Besides, it was warm in here and she liked being warm.

"Did he say much?"

"Only that our welcome was ‘a little excessive.’" There was a glint in his eyes and Carter smiled despite herself. 

"Sounds like he’ll be okay," she said almost to herself.

"Your father apologized for his tardiness, however he asked me not to wake you."

"That’s okay, Teal’c, we can talk later, thanks."

O’Neill stirred behind her and tightened his grip on her. "Err, sir," she started, feeling the breath being pushed out of her. "Colonel?"

He spluttered awake, apologizing and rubbing his eyes.

"It’s okay, really sir."

"You sleep okay?" he asked.

She nodded. "Better, thanks."

"Anytime, Carter. Now, shall we discuss your reckless behavior in the snow yesterday?"

"Sorry, I should have put my outside gear on."

O’Neill agreed with her. "Don’t do it again, Carter. Fraiser will have your hide."

"Mine too I guess." Daniel had stirred and was rubbing his eyes. He fumbled around looking for his glasses. Fraiser had hung them on a loop above him. He slipped them on letting the world slide back into focus. "Still, all in one piece?"

They agreed. "What time is it?" Sam couldn’t be bothered to extract her arm from the warmth of the bag. 

O’Neill squinted at the dial of his watch and sighed. "Oh-Five hundred." 

Daniel moaned. "I’m going back to sleep, Jack."

"I’d better check on the troops." He started moving out. 

"I do not require further rest, Major Carter, perhaps you could take over from me here and I will assist Colonel O’Neill."

"Good idea, Teal’c." She waited for Teal’c to get out, then hopped from one bag to the other. 

"Hi, Dad," she said settling in, wrapping her arms around him. Teal’c piled the blankets back on top of them and tucked them in gently.

"Get some more sleep kids, I’m not rousing the troops till at least 0700. Catch some more ZZs."

"Yes, sir."

"Sure, Jack," Daniel was almost asleep again anyway.

The blizzard hadn’t stopped yet and if anything it had gotten worse. There were two new sentries and O’Neill realized he hadn’t been on a mission with them before. They were SG-2 special detachment. Alert kids, but kids all the same. They’d been talking when he arrived.

"Any more blago?"

"No sir, just the one last night Paxman got."

"Breakfast," O’Neill informed them. "Stay sharp."

"Yes, sir." 

O’Neill and Teal’c wandered back to the main cavern and settled round the fire. Someone had built it up again and it was burning nicely. 

"General Carter does not know about his daughter’s ordeal, O’Neill." Teal'c said finally. "There is no doubt he will not take the news well."

"Ya think?"

The older man stirred slightly as she tightened her grasp and tried not to show she was crying. She wasn’t sure why she was crying, only that she didn’t want him disturbed by it. He’d start asking questions. Ones she didn’t want to answer. His arm moved around her waist and she snuggled into his body. "It’s okay, Dad, you can sleep now. We don’t have to get up yet."

"Sammy?" he said sleepily. She looked up into his eyes. "Hi," he said. "Been a while."

She laughed a little. "Yeah, over two months, Dad. Where the hell have you been?"

He coughed. She bolted upright and leaned over him protectively. "Dad? Are you okay?"

The cough subsided and he nodded, smiling. "Saving the galaxy kinda takes it outta you."

She laid back down and rested her head on his chest again. "I’m sorry we didn’t come sooner Sam. We couldn’t. You understand? Martouf told me as soon as we returned to the Tok’ra. We came straight away."

She felt something else in his words. "You were sick when you came." 

He nodded. "Selmak’s been working on it. Wasn’t quite expecting a welcoming committee like that."

She smiled. "Sorry dad, we weren’t expecting anyone to come straight through. Wasn’t in the plan."

Her father raised his eyebrows. "You knew it was gonna happen?"

"We knew it might. And it did. You okay now?"

"Still got a lot of work to do but we’ll be fine in a couple of days."

Her eyes were bobbing closed, she was still tired. "Let’s get some sleep, Dad. We can talk later."

Jacob reached out to his daughter with his mind, he felt an overwhelming sense of exhaustion and something else. 

"Is everything okay, Sam?" he asked.

"Yeah, Dad. Let’s just rest for a while."

Selmak agreed with Sam that they should rest and Jacob succumbed to the drowsiness, holding tightly to his daughter.

A single tear escaped her eye and was absorbed by the blankets. She closed them, lest more escape, and wondered if she could bring herself to tell him the truth. She would, but not now.

* * * * *

The lights came on in SG-11’s tent first. Gilbert emerged a few minutes later with the breakfast barbecue lighting crew. They built the fire up under their grills. Slowly the cavern drifted into life. The Hladan women set about preparing the meat for the BBQ. The little fires were rebuilt and life returned.

O’Neill called the morning meeting in the medical tent. Fraiser was tending Jacob and wouldn’t budge. She let Sam get up. Her temperature was back to normal and she seemed alert enough. Daniel had volunteered to warm Jacob for a while. For some reason he couldn’t keep his eyes open. O’Neill couldn’t think of a reason to make him get up yet, and he needed Carter to work with the techies.

Carter was now fully in control of her faculties and immediately put the dampers on their plan formulated the night before. "On Edorra the Naquadah was superheated by the meteor, it formed an iris just above the event horizon because the gate was open. We shut the gate down before it was buried. Unless there’s enough space between the snow and ice particles the vortex won’t form." It was obvious and a crushing blow. 

"The snow will compact as soon as it stops flowing. It hardens," Whitney added glumly.

"Like a cover stone. Shit," Ferretti muttered.

"Okay, so what do we do, Carter?"

"Well it’s worth a try sir. If nothing else, locking the chevrons will make a noise we can use to home in."

"Right, okay. That storm’s still dumping snow out there. Little, any news on that?"

Little shook his head. "Can’t say, sir, could last two more minutes or two more days. Can’t launch the UAV right now, wouldn’t be able to see enough to fly it. Sorry, sir."

"Okay, SG-7, your mission is to find that gate. SG-11, you need a plan of how to get it out of the snow and working. Ferretti, SG-2 is on survival duties, I wanna know what we need and where you think you can get it. Then we’ll assign units for scrounging. We’re probably gonna be here for another night so we need to get organized. Anyone else not doing something, get them making those snow shoes… I think we’re gonna need them."

**  
**

17

The tent was really only big enough for three to sleep comfortably but Fraiser wanted people to buddy up and save heat, it was going to be another long and cold night. Carter didn’t want to be cold. She _hated_ being cold. She’d made two pairs of snow shoes today, it had become a competition. Her sewing was better than most, but all that sitting around hadn’t done much to help keep her warm, and now she had three hot water bottles in her sights.

Daniel and Jack were already inside, settling themselves. She stuck her head in the entrance.

"Hi, guys," she said brightly. "Mind if I bunk with you? Dad doesn’t need a buddy."

O’Neill waved her in. "Sure Major, always room for you." She pushed in her sleeping bag. Daniel took the extra blankets from her whilst she crawled into the bag, settling between them. Together they arranged the blankets over the top.

Teal’c popped his head through the door. "Over here, Teal’c." He picked his way over them to the side and crawled into his bag. 

"Goodnight, Jim Bob." Teal’c said solemnly, bypassing the normal routine. They all cracked up, wished each other goodnight and settled down.

A couple of hours later, Teal’c was deep in Kel-no-reem and O’Neill was snoring softly. Sam was lying on her back, staring up at the roof of the tent. 

"You okay, Sam?" Daniel asked.

She turned and shook her head. "Can’t sleep," she whispered, "I’m freezing." 

"Doesn’t bring back great memories for me either," O’Neill muttered. He was awake too.

Sam looked over to him. He was lying on his side facing away from her. 

"Thought you were asleep, sir. Sorry if I woke you."

He turned over to face her. "Two can play at that game, Carter. So, feel like talking?"

She shrugged. "I’m just cold. I hate being cold."

"Me too," O’Neill agreed, but his eyes pressed her to keep talking.

She shivered and wriggled pulling the sleeping bag tighter round her.

"Hey, Danny, shuffle over here." O’Neill twisted himself round and wrapped his arms around Carter. "Let’s make us a Carter sandwich." She laughed as Daniel snuggled in on the other side just resting his arm over her body under the blankets. 

She wriggled again, snuggling into them both. "How come you guys are so warm?" she whispered. 

"Must be our glowing personalities."

She stifled a giggle, rested her head on Jack’s chest, and closed her eyes contentedly as the heat seeped into her. She felt at peace and was so tired. But there was one more thing. Did she want to talk?

"Dad still doesn’t know what happened." 

"Do you want to tell him?" Daniel asked.

She sniffed in the darkness and a small, "I don’t know," escaped from her lips in a half whisper.

Daniel’s arms found their way to her face, he wiped the tears away. "It’s all right, Sam."

She shook her head. "Telling you guys was just so hard, I don’t know if I'm ready…" her voice trailed off.

Jack rubbed her arm. "I’ll do it, Carter. He’s gonna have a lot of questions. I’ll handle it."

She thought about it. "He’s gonna be mad at you, sir, even though he shouldn’t." It was a warning he didn’t need. 

"However he finds out, kid, he’s not gonna like it. It might be better coming from me. Besides, you shouldn’t have to keep reliving this. I can tell him," he offered.

She fought back the tears, pulling his arm around her. "Thanks." 

He squeezed her gently. "No problem. Now we got a busy day tomorrow, let’s get some sleep."

She wriggled again between Daniel and Jack and settled under the covers between them. It was warm and cozy. She felt so safe sandwiched between them, and she could feel that Teal’c was close by too. The tiredness and exhaustion nipped at her consciousness and she was soon soundly asleep. Daniel’s and Jack’s eyes met in the darkness. Jack gave him a thin smile and closed his eyes. His mind drifting.

She awoke suddenly, aware that there were two people lying so close she was almost being crushed. Her heart was pounding in her head. She had a sudden sensation of claustrophobia. She gasped trying to catch her breath. It was very dark, she could feel Teal’c was there though she couldn’t see him. She pushed one of the men gently, he flopped away. She recognized the mop of hair as Daniel moaned softly. She clamped her hand over her mouth and tried to slow her breathing as waves of nausea swept over her. She couldn’t hold it. Gasping, she bolted for the exit and emerged into the cooler cave air. She fell to her knees in a corner, retching.

"Sam?" Daniel whispered from behind her, he rubbed his eyes sleepily. "Sam, you okay?"

She turned slowly to face him and shook her head silently then turned away and carried on throwing up. Daniel knelt down and put his arm around her, and pulled her hair back from her face. "It’s okay, Sam," he whispered reassuringly. "It’s okay."

When she had nothing left, she hung her head and wiped her mouth with the back of her hand, disgusted with herself. She cursed and took several deep breaths. Her spinning head slowed, she forced a calmness over herself, regaining control.

Finally she looked up at her friend. "Nightmare," she said simply. "Okay now."

Daniel smiled at her and offered her a canteen of water. As she washed out her mouth and sipped the warm liquid as Daniel ducked back into the tent and grabbed their coats. He nodded at the awake Teal’c and O’Neill. "I got it," he said simply then he was gone.

When he came back Sam was sitting on the floor, cross-legged, her head drooping.

"Hey, you’d better sit on this." He shoved a box beside her. 

She lifted herself onto it and held her head. "This is stupid," she muttered.

Daniel draped her coat around her shoulders. "It’s okay," he said. "It’s not stupid, you’ve got a lot on your mind." He pulled up his own box.

She nodded. "This was supposed to be a simple mission, nice and easy."

Daniel smiled. "Nothing’s ever simple at the SGC, Sam, you know that. We’re making it up as we go along. This is just another little adventure."

She glared at him. "I wasn’t looking for adventure, Daniel. I was looking for easy."

Daniel raised his eyebrows. "Doesn’t sound like you, Sam."

"Not been myself recently. Hadn’t you noticed?" Her voice was so heavily laced with sarcasm, it could have been Jack talking.

"I had, actually," Daniel replied as innocently as possible.

Sam shivered.

"You gonna come back to bed? It’s cold out here."

She shook her head. "I need a few minutes Daniel, you go ahead. I’ll be right in."

"You’re sure?"

"Yeah."

"If you’re not back in 10 minutes I’ll send out a search party."

Sam shrugged. "Where the hell am I gonna go?"

"See you in a while." Letting his hand linger on her shoulder for a few seconds, their eyes met and she smiled weakly. He left her there alone and crawled back into the tent.

Jack’s eyes shone in the darkness. "She all right?"

Daniel nodded as he got back into his sleeping bag. "She just needs a few minutes."

They lay awake, listening to the fire crackle softly, almost drowning out the muffled sobs. Just when Jack couldn’t stand it any longer they subsided.

Carter blew her nose softly, downed the rest of the water and headed back to the tent. As she crawled back in the men moved to make room between them.

"Sorry guys," she said quietly, as she zipped herself in.

"Carter," O’Neill began.

"It was a nightmare sir, the whole thing was a god damned nightmare." She rolled onto her side and pulled the jacket she was using as a pillow down, tucking her arm under it. 

The silence hung in the darkness as O’Neill struggled for something to say. "Carter," he started again.

"I’m tired and I’m cold. Can we just go back to sleep, please?" Her voice broke halfway through. Daniel reached out and pulled her into his arms, she didn’t resist. "Thanks," she whispered. 

* * * * *

Fraiser was wandering the complex partly taking a mental break, partly returning to a former worry. The complex wasn’t so big you could get lost that easily, especially the section where the SGC had set up shop. Her patient had to be round here somewhere…

After last night, Daniel and Teal’c had been hovering protectively all morning. They had brought her breakfast in their tent. They all ate the MREs together. Sam had picked at the food unenthusiastically until O’Neill threatened to confine her to the medical tent if she didn’t eat up. He also made it an order. It didn’t change the speed she ate, only her persistence. She was tired and despite that didn’t want to be cooped up anywhere. She knew she had to eat. She was having trouble staying warm. After finishing breakfast she cleaned herself up, brushed her teeth and downed a second large mug of coffee. It was 10:00 hrs and she was starting to feel human again. 

Fraiser slid down in front of the fire next to Sam.

"Hey," she said lightly, "how you doing?"

Sam shrugged wondering if Daniel had told her. "I was sick last night," she admitted. "Damned nightmares."

Fraiser warmed her hands at the fire. "Get much sleep?"

Sam nodded. "Few hours each side. The guys were great about it." She smiled wistfully. "Even got breakfast in bed this morning."

Fraiser smiled. "Better not get used to that, Sam."

She nodded. "I know."

"Sam, are you always sick with the nightmares?"

Carter stifled a shudder and nodded. "Pretty much."

"Why don’t you try and eat your three meals earlier in the day, don’t have anything heavy after about 6, just a little snack if you’re hungry." Fraiser shrugged. "See if that helps."

Carter nodded. "I hate throwing up. It’s hard enough to eat in the first place right now. I should at least get something from it."

"Well, try that and we’ll see how you go. Little and often might work too, but we’ll save that for when we get back home."

Sam nodded and looked the doctor in the eye. "I am okay, Janet," she answered. "The guys are really looking after me. Colonel O’Neill even ordered me to finish my breakfast this morning, then made me have a lie-in."

Fraiser smiled. A silence hung in the air.

"Dad still asleep?" Carter changed the subject.

Fraiser nodded. "Out like a light. He woke up, asked for some water, drank a couple of pints and crashed out again. He said, ‘Hi’, by the way."

Sam nodded. "He also said he would probably be out for another twenty-four hours." Sam nodded again. "He’s gonna be okay Sam, he and Selmak just need to rest some more."

"I’ve missed him…"

Janet patted her leg gently. "I know, he’s missed you too." Carter gave the doctor a thin smile. "You know, when we get home, you two should take a vacation."

Sam smiled. "Some place warm!" They both laughed.

"Well, how ‘bout I check you out?"

Sam shrugged. "Better ask my minder." She indicated to Teal’c who was meditating nearby.

Fraiser called out to him, he acknowledged her with a nod as the women rose.

"That blizzard is starting to get on my nerves," Fraiser began as they walked back to the main cave.

Sam shrugged. "Might go on for a while yet, how’s things at the 4077?" Sam pointed to Fraiser’s medical tent as it came into view. Fraiser smiled, SG-11 had put the sign up yesterday "4077MSGCH".

"Give them much more down time, they’ll have a sign with SGC 50,000 Light years, Chulak, 40." 

Sam smiled knowingly. Gilbert had checked with her this morning. "Actually it’s 15 and 28."

"You would know that though wouldn’t you? Come on in." Fraiser let the woman into the tent. There were a couple of empty cots. "Why don’t you hop in there to keep warm while I get ready."

Sam started undoing zips and fasteners. Once she was in, Fraiser started her exam, just exposing the part she needed. She finished with blood pressure. She frowned as she pulled off the cuff. Sam poked her arm back under the covers.

"What’s wrong?"

Fraiser made some notes on her chart. "BP’s a little high Sam, I’d like to do it again when you’ve been resting for a while."

"Okay."

"I’ll give you 10-15 minutes, just try and relax, think happy thoughts. I’ll be back."

Sam lay still in the quiet tent for a minute or two. It wasn’t bright, actually Fraiser had turned out the main light when she left. There was an eerie glow from the lights rigged in the cavern. It was quiet and peaceful. Her eyes started to droop. She shifted, rolling onto her side and pulling the pillow down, almost hugging it.

_  
_

Just a little doze.

Her eyes flicked open as she heard Fraiser come almost creeping back in. Fraiser looked carefully at the cot and tried to make out if Carter was asleep yet.

"Janet?" 

Her shoulders visibly slumped. _Rumbled!_ "Hi, Sam," she said gently.

"Wasn’t anything wrong with my blood pressure was there?" Carter challenged.

"Sam?" Fraiser began innocently, squatting down beside the cot.

"Janet, I am trying to be sensible about this, you don’t have to trick me into taking care of myself. A simple ‘Sam, you look like shit, take a nap’ would work."

"Sam, you look like shit, take a nap.".

"I asked for that."

"Yes, you did."

"I’ll get cold in here, can I nap with Dad?"

"Sure, he’s next door, just run round and hop in. I’ll bring the rest of your gear over in a minute."

Carter extracted herself, stepped into her boots, picked up one of the blankets and wrapped it around her shoulders. Her light jacket and fatigues were no comfort against the chill, even for a short hop. When Fraiser delivered Sam’s extra clothes, she was nestled against her father, already asleep.

Fraiser smiled to herself. She’d wake her up for something to eat in a couple of hours. Turning out all the lights, she left and placed a ‘Do Not Disturb’ sign on the entrance.

_  
_

Mission accomplished!

Then she was distracted by a loud banging noise. She turned towards it. SG-11 were hammering a post into the ground.

"What the hell?"

"Just putting up a sign, ma’am." Gilbert informed her brightly.

"Do you have to be so loud? I’ve got patients trying to sleep."

"All done, ma'am" one of the soldiers reported. They parted so she could see their handiwork.

The arrows were pointing straight up.

"It’s symbolic," Gilbert supplied, "because the actual directions will change with the planet’s rotations and orbits." His arms whirled around each other chaotically.

"You’ve been talking to Carter, haven’t you?"

Gilbert grinned. Fraiser shook her head and walked away smiling.

Inside the tent, Sam had stirred at the banging. Hearing the muffled exchange, including her name, she smiled and closed her eyes, settling back to sleep.

**  
**

18

"Sir, Major King and I would like to join SG-2 on their trip to the woods, so we can complete the mineral survey."

"Carter." He was going to say no.

"We’re gonna have to do it sooner or later, SG-2 are going anyway. We could just tag along. We won’t get in the way." She persisted.

"Carter, you’re tired."

"With respect, sir, no, I’m not. I’ve been asleep all morning. I’m wide awake. I’m not tired, I’m not sick. I want to get this job finished. It won’t take long."

"Check it with Fraiser. She says you’re okay you can go." She didn't move, glaring at him. "Go see Fraiser." O'Neill shooed her away.

Sam skulked off annoyed. "Maybe I should just get a note from my Dad," she muttered to herself. 

Fraiser only warned her to take it easy and be careful. If she felt tired, she should say something. Sam pulled her note pad out of her pants thigh pocket and handed it to Fraiser with a pen.

"You want me to write you a note?"

"He might not believe me."

"Sam he’s only trying…"

"I know he’s trying to help, trying to protect me… smothering and annoying the hell out of me, more like." Janet wrote a few lines. She tore off the page and folded it a few times, and wrote ‘Col. O’Neill’ on the outside.

"Don’t read it. That’s an order."

Sam took the note and stomped back to the rest of SG-1. She thrust the paper into his hand and glared at him triumphantly as he opened the paper.

_  
_

Colonel O’Neill. Major Carter is okay to do the survey. Keep an eye on her, but be subtle, you’re starting to piss her off.

Jack’s eyebrows rose. He glanced at Carter. Well it didn’t take much to see she was annoyed.

_  
_

Let Daniel and Teal’c supervise. Take care. Fraiser.

"Daniel, Teal’c, we’re going on a field trip… We’re gonna help the majors with some rocks." He smiled at her, but she wasn’t going for it. "You’d better pack your gear," he said finally.

"Yes sir," she bit out, then turned and left him.

Jack scratched his head. "We leave in 20 minutes," he called after her. "Don’t be late," he added in a whisper.

"He doesn’t trust me any more," she muttered to no one.

"That is not correct." The voice behind her made her jump.

"Jeez, Teal’c, don’t sneak up on me like that!"

He inclined his head slightly. "I apologize." Sam continued packing her rucksack. "You have become increasingly agitated this morning. Is our behavior the cause of this?"

"Yes," she said, "it is."

"Then I will attempt to rectify it." He nodded to her and disappeared as quickly as he had appeared.

Sam returned to Max King and together they finalized plans for the survey. They met up with SG-2, who were going to the woods to harvest a couple of tall trees for the lifting A-frame. Prepared for the short trip, but also for if they got stuck, SG-2, SG-1 and Max King headed out over the flow.

When they entered the forest SG-2 had started felling trees. Max stayed in their area and collected samples. Carter suggested that SG-1 go a little further into the forest so she could collect plant materials too. O’Neill had agreed, SG-2 were quite capable of getting on with the lumbering under Ferretti’s watchful gaze. They hadn’t wandered far when they entered a small clearing. Carter and Daniel set about collecting samples whilst Teal’c and O’Neill looked on. Bored.

"Teal’c, keep an eye on those two." Teal’c nodded, returning his gaze to the two scientists. "I’m gonna check on SG-2 and take a leak."

Teal’c’s eyebrow rose. Jack waved the question away and wandered off alone. 

SG-2 were making great progress. The trees were straight and tall with few extra branches. Satisfied, Jack returned to his team, pausing for a few moments to relieve himself.

Teal’c had a feeling that they were being watched. The forest was too thick for blago, so it had to be something, or someone else. He stood still, listening.

"What is it, Teal’c?" Sam knew that stance all too well, something was wrong. He motioned her to stay silent. She rose slowly from where she was crouched, taking rock samples, trying not to make any more noise.

"We should return to the others," he intoned.

Daniel was a few feet away, scrabbling in the snow. "Sam, look at this!" He brushed away more snow from a rock and started translating the inscription, muttering softly to himself, his mind forming the words quicker than his mouth could voice them.

They heard a twig snap. Teal’c and Sam whirled around in the direction of the noise. Teal’c pointed his staff weapon into the trees and slowly turned towards Carter.

"Major Carter, do not move."

She froze and swallowed hard. "Why?" she breathed.

"Divvut," Daniel supplied, standing up.

"What?"

"Turn slowly, Major Carter."

She swiveled slowly at the hips. A few feet away the huge white-gray furry animal stood staring at her. It looked like a cross between a wolf and a lion, its haunches coming up to her thighs. It was big, it was drooling, and it looked hungry. Its face screwed up into a snarl. She knew she couldn’t outrun it. She knew Teal’c could blast it before it got to her so she forced herself to calm down and started breathing slowly and evenly.

"Daniel Jackson, please come this way." Daniel stood slowly. Out of the corner of his eye he spotted movement. "Teal’c, he’s not alone." There were actually several of them, now closing in on them from all sides.

"They look hungry guys and I really don’t wanna be lunch," Sam managed lightly. She started to ease her sidearm from its holster. Teal’c lined up the closest animal to her with his staff weapon.

"Carter! TEAL’C!"

She turned towards her CO’s voice. The first one lunged. Teal’c fired. Sam started moving but there was a second divvut behind the first. Teal’c couldn’t fire again as Sam was now in the way. Daniel froze for an instant then drew his sidearm and fired twice at the divvut jumping at him. It fell to the ground, pinning him underneath.

Carter turned and managed to fire a single shot as the divvut pounced. It fell at her feet. Teal’c whirled around, felling three other animals who bolted from the trees. But none of them saw the last one coming.

Jack heard the shots and staff blasts and started running, calling their names even louder. Then he heard a scream followed by the distinct discharge of a Zat. A few seconds later he skidded into the clearing his MP5 leveled and ready. Daniel was crawling out from under a lump of fur, Teal’c pulled another lump off Carter and zatted it again. 

"Carter!" he called sliding in beside Teal’c. The blood spurted rhythmically from the bloody mess on the back of her thigh. Instinctively he forced his gloved hand over the fountain.

"She was caught by the Zat," Teal’c informed him. "There may be more."

"Check it out. Get some help."

Carter started to moan softly.

"Stay still Carter, stay still!" He pulled off his rucksack one handed and fumbled for the med. kit. "Daniel? Daniel, are you all right?"

The archeologist shook his head to clear it, checked his limbs and managed an "I think so."

"Then get over here, dammit, Carter’s hurt."

Daniel regained his senses and scrambled over to them.

The blood seeped through Jack's fingers. "It’s gotta be the artery, Daniel, here." He grabbed Daniel’s hand and slapped it on the wound. "Press real hard," he ordered as he rummaged in the medical kit. "Daniel, what the hell happened?" 

Daniel tried to explain quickly… he’d noticed these inscriptions and…

"Dammit, Daniel, I told you to be careful!" He was angry. He was scared. If they couldn’t stop the bleeding she would die, quickly. 

O'Neill pulled a string from the bottom of his jacket and threaded it around the top of her leg. He tied it off and inserted a small twig which he started turning. She screamed herself awake. She hurt all over like… she remembered Teal’c pointing the Zat at the creature, it must have got her too. But her leg suddenly lanced with pain. She tried to roll over.

"Lie still!" O’Neill shouted at her.

Carter twisted round as he turned the twig. Her hand leapt to the site of the pain. He shoved it away.

"Sir?" she gasped. "Oh, shit." She muttered as she saw the blood covering her hand.

"Major, just lie still, okay?" She stared into O'Neill’s blue eyes. Intensity and worry their only emotions as he called on the radio for Fraiser. 

"Where the hell is Teal’c?"

"He went for help," Daniel supplied weakly.

"Dammit, Daniel, you were supposed to be watching her."

"I was!" Daniel started. "Jack, it’s not my…."

"Sir?" she managed again, her head was clearing. They ignored her, the older man laying into the young man mercilessly, still turning the tourniquet.

"Will you two cut it out!" she shouted thumping the snow. "Dammit, it’s tight enough!" 

O’Neill regained a little composure. "Carter, you’ve been bitten."

"No shit!" She rolled onto her side despite their protests.

"I think I’ve stopped the bleeding…"

Carter took some deep breaths, assimilating what her eyes and body were telling her.

"Artery?" she asked quietly. O’Neill just nodded.

She wiped her brow, smearing it with her own blood. "Shit."

O’Neill’s ear-piece crackled.

_  
_

"Fraiser here, Colonel, what’s the problem?"

"Carter’s been bitten by a wolf type thing, but bigger." He paused. "I think it’s got the artery."

_  
_

"Have you stopped the bleeding?"

"Yeah, tourniquet right at the top of her leg, its pretty high up, back of her thigh."

_  
_

"Is she conscious?"

Sam nodded, her faced screwed up in pain. 

"Yeah, we got it stopped pretty quick."

_  
_

"Get her back here ASAP, Colonel, and keep an eye on it. Release the…"

"I know, Doc, got it covered."

Teal’c came from the trees, SG-2 behind him.

"Shit," Ferretti exclaimed. " What the hell…"

Someone knelt by her head, lifting it onto his lap. She looked up.

"Hi, Major." The familiar brown eyes of Captain Conner stared down at her. "Still with us?"

She nodded, her head started to get fuzzy. "Conner?"

"Yes, ma’am, hang in there."

"Sam," Daniel started, "Sam , its gonna be okay."

That almost made her laugh but she had another problem. "I’m getting cold guys."

Conner gently brushed the loose snow off her and ruffled her hair. "We’ll get you back to the Doc real soon."

"You’re all lousy liars." She knew it was a good half hour’s ski. She couldn’t ski, not like this.

O’Neill finished tying off the bandages over the puncture wounds they didn’t seem so bad but she gasped as he finished, pulling it tight.

"Sorry, Carter."

Whitney surveyed the situation, they would have to get her out of this forest and back to the caves. He rummaged in his pack, pulling out a tightly rolled sleeping bag. He unfurled it and shouted at Paxman and Jimmy to find a couple of trees for poles. "Stay close!" Ferretti added to those orders. "Whitney? You gotta plan?"

"Sir, we build a sledge, load up and get the hell outta here before their friends come back."

Ferretti patted him on the back. "Whadda you need kid?"

Whitney reeled of a list and threw some rope out of his pack for the logs to be tied with. "We can use some of the logs we’ve cut already."

Whitney threw the sleeping bag over to Conner. "Cover her with that, we’ll get her in it later. Try not to get any snow inside." The three men laid the thick fabric out over her.

"Shit, Shit, Shit." She thumped at the snow in frustration.

"Calm down, Major." O’Neill spoke calmly. "Don’t get worked up, it won’t help."

"This was gonna be such a good day," she almost cried. 

O’Neill rubbed her arm supportively. "Day’s not over yet Carter, just hang in there."

Teal’c hovered, not sure how best to help and cursing himself for not being quick enough to prevent this occurring. He snapped round as someone called his name.

Paxman pointed to the base of a small tree. Teal’c nodded. Paxman skittered back as Teal’c fired his staff weapon. Paxman and Jimmy pulled off the weedy branches and dragged it over to Whitney. They felled three more trees and took them to Whitney who was winding rope around the logs, making them into a raft.

Conner and Daniel were talking to Sam. "I don’t need this right now," she was saying, "I got enough problems." Conner glanced at Daniel but he ignored the unvoiced question and carried on in reassuring tones.

"Whitney!" O’Neill called, "We gotta get outta here!"

"Nearly there, sir."

"Come on," he growled. "We haven’t got all day!"

Ferretti came up behind O’Neill and placed a hand on his shoulder. "They’ve nearly finished, sir," he said quietly. O'Neill glanced up. "They know, okay?" Ferretti assured him.

Jack let out a breath. His watch beeped at him, pulling him back to his task. "Carter, I gotta let this off for a minute. You might start bleeding again."

"I don’t wanna loose my leg, sir." Her eyes met his.

"I know, here we go." He undid the tourniquet a few turns. Blood started leaking through the bandages. Daniel pressed his hands tighter around the wound. She moaned softly. Daniel apologized.

"Is it getting through?" O’Neill asked.

She nodded, the sensation was returning, pins and needles and an odd warmth. But her head was getting fuzzy too. She cried out as O’Neill clamped his hands round the bandages as well.

"Major?" Conner shook her slightly. "She’s drifting, sir."

Jack cursed, re-tightened the tourniquet and reset his watch. 

Whitney told Paxman and Jimmy to copy his binding at the other end of the logs. It took only minutes to bind and cross-strengthen the raft. Two reigns were left dangling at the top and the narrow outer poles made perfect handles. They would have to carry her a few hundred yards out of the forest before skiing the rest of the way.

"Done!" Whitney proclaimed. The five men hoisted up the raft and took it over to where Carter was lying.

"Hey, Major," Whitney’s face slid into focus in front of her.

"Whitney?"

He smiled. "We’re gonna get you onto this, ma’am, and get you back to the cave. Might be a little bumpy."

"I can handle bumpy," she replied softly.

Whitney took the sleeping bag off the top of her and laid it out on the raft. He opened it up. "We’re gonna stand you up for a second." The men lifted her up and stood her on her good leg. The sudden change in altitude made her head spin.

"Brush the snow off her," Whitney ordered. She was so numb the many hands battering her felt like gentle rain. She closed her eyes. Conner shook her awake again. 

"Stay with us, Carter," O’Neill ordered, seeing her head droop.

"Okay, get her in." 

Teal’c wrapped his arms around her waist and lifted her gently over the raft, planting her feet in the bottom of the bag. Many hands guided her down and Whitney zipped her up.

Paxman unfurled another bag from his pack and they laid this out on top.

"Let’s go," O’Neill ordered. They gathered around the stretcher and on O’Neill’s count lifted her into the air. Jack glanced back at the carnage they left behind. The snow was stained red and pink with her blood. In contrast her face had turned as white as the fresh clean snow that had started to fall.

It took several minutes to emerge from the forest. They located their skis again easily. Whitney laid his out at the head of the raft then pulled on the ropes and tied them round his waist. The weight of the raft rested on his hips. He clipped on his skis and without a word started pulling his burden across the snow. O’Neill’s watch beeped again. He made them stop and released the tourniquet. Carter started drifting again. The blood seeped through the dressing again but she could feel the pins and needles. They wrapped another dressing on top of the sodden ones and re-tightened. 

Teal’c took the opportunity to relieve Whitney. The kid looked tired. Teal’c was a stronger man and when they started moving again, Teal’c channeled his self-hate and recrimination into his movements. Their pace quickened. They called ahead to Fraiser to give her an update. She was ready for them, as ready as she could be.

Fraiser wasn’t equipped to do surgery. Apart from the fact that she wasn’t a surgeon, that was Warner’s specialty, they hadn’t brought much in the way of surgical equipment. All she’d managed to gather were a bunch of suture packs - complete with local anesthetic- IV packs, antibiotics and pain killers. She hoped it wouldn’t come to that but from the description she had she would have to do something. She hoped she had enough of what she needed and that she had the skill to carry it off. 

Mercifully, Jacob was still fast asleep. Fraiser wasn’t prepared to wake him until she was sure what she was dealing with. She dispatched a group of airmen to the cave entrance with a stretcher to collect her patient. As they waited the snow began to fall even harder.

It was worse than it looked. The four puncture wounds were very deep and one had found the femoral artery. The other three were still oozing. Sam herself was pale and cold. Despite her team-mates efforts she was fast slipping into hypothermia. The tourniquet was doing its job in stopping the bleeding, but it was also cutting off the circulation to her leg. Fraiser knew if she didn’t do something, Carter would bleed to death, lose her leg to frostbite, or both. 

"Colonel, please?" She needed him out of the way. He stepped back and hung around the edge of the tent with the others. Daniel was stroking her hair and talking in that reassuring tone he could ramble in for hours. Fraiser and her medics buzzed. They stripped off her outer clothes, cut off her blood soaked fatigues and threaded another pair onto her good leg. Jason clipped off the free leg at the crotch and threaded it up to the wound site. The thermometer beeped. "91.6"

"Daniel," Fraiser said, "she needs warming up."

"Oh, okay." He started peeling off his outer clothes. 

Fraiser dug for the major’s dog tags. She’d lost a lost of blood and needed a transfusion. "B neg.," O’Neill said sadly. He made it a point to know those kind of things about his team.

_  
_

Rare blood group and weird biochemistry, you don’t make things easy do you Sam? Fraiser mused. "Annie, I need B neg. and O neg. Start with two and take names of the rest for later." 

Whitney stepped forward and unzipped his jacket. "I’m O neg. ma’am." O’Neill glanced at him incredulously, as Fraiser checked his tags. 

"Annie, set him up. Can someone go look for more?" Ferretti went hunting.

"Whitney?" O’Neill started, "What do you normally do at the SGC?"

"Guard duty, sir. I’m new." He shrugged, that was the way things worked. There was a lot to guard at the SGC.

O’Neill ruffled the kid’s hair as the nurse inserted the needle in his arm. "Waste of talent. We're gonna have to do something about that."

Fraiser stepped back from her patient as Daniel settled in wrapping his arms protectively round her. Jason folded the sleeping bag shut around them, leaving the wound exposed. The doctor considered her options. Jason was a competent nurse used to assisting in surgery. Annie was young but bearing up well under the pressure. Sam was stabilizing. She was replying to Daniel now. The blood would help and would also help bring her temperature up. But her leg was still cold and there wasn’t much of a pulse. _Decision time._

"Colonel?" Fraiser called him over to one side and explained her predicament.

Sam could hear the low voices, Fraiser was stealing glances at her. "Janet?" she called, "my leg’s cold. I can’t feel it anymore. I’m screwed, right?"

Daniel started to deny it but Fraiser stopped him.

"We can stop the bleeding with the tourniquet but you’ll probably loose your leg."

"Can’t you fix it?" she asked innocently.

"I’m not a surgeon, Sam…"

"Can’t you try?" The accusation in her voice cut into Fraiser like a knife. She paused before answering, but O’Neill jumped in to explain.

"Carter we haven’t got the right equipment here, including anesthetic."

"I don’t wanna lose my leg," she said clearly, the tears welling up into her eyes. "I can’t, not now. I just got myself back together…" she broke out sobbing.

Whitney squeezed her hand instinctively, though he didn’t have a clue what she was talking about. 

"Sam, honey. I can try, but it’s really gonna hurt and it might not work anyway."

"I can take it, Janet. Please, you have to try."

"Okay, Sam. Here’s what we’ll do…" She explained the problems and offered to wake Jacob but Sam refused. He’d just get in the way. They agreed if it wasn’t working Fraiser would clamp it off and stop the bleeding. Losing a leg was better than dying. Sam wasn’t sure but at least she would have time to think about it.

Fraiser used the lidocaine from the suture packs to numb up the wound and gave her a shot of morphine. Her blood pressure was coming back up. Whitney’s eyes bobbed shut. He was obviously pumping more into her than Fraiser expected. She let O’Neill and Teal’c tend to him when he fainted. Fraiser asked for the next one. Conner rolled up his sleeve. "B neg. ma’am," he reported. Annie hooked him up. 

"Okay, I think we’re ready." Fraiser reported. Daniel nodded and held Sam tightly to his chest. She was lying on her right side, the damaged left leg bent up at the knee. Fraiser, scrubbed as best she could, nestled herself between her legs. Everyone round the edge of the tent was warming bottles of fluids or drugs inside their jackets, ready for use. Carter drifted in and out of consciousness dopey from drugs, the cold and loss of blood. Fraiser took a last and steadying deep breath. She prodded the wound a few times to check the lidocaine was working. Getting no reaction from her patient she started to cut.

_  
_

That, she thought, _is the problem with puncture wounds. You have to cut muscle to see what you are doing._

It seemed to take forever, but finally she found the artery. Daniel undid the tourniquet. A jet of blood spurted from the exposed vessel a foot in the air. "That’s it, close it off Daniel." The fountain subsided. They cleaned up and she set to work.

It was all the wrong kind of stuff for a job like this. The suture thread was really too thin but it was all she had and would have to do. It didn’t have to be pretty. It didn’t have to last her for ever. It just had to hold long enough to get them back to the SGC so Warner could fix it properly. Hell maybe Martouf could help with the healing device. Fraiser directed Teal’c, who was holding a torch, to shine it directly onto her repair job. "Okay Daniel, let it off slowly."

The vessel visibly swelled and a little blood oozed out then stopped. "Okay," she breathed, "let it go all the way." The vessel quivered with the pulsating liquid within. It held, no more leaks.

"Annie?" The nurse checked Sam’s left leg for a foot pulse. She smiled, "Good pulse, ma’am, and the leg’s pinking up."

A collective sigh of relief was exhaled, Daniel squeezed her gently. "You’re gonna be all right Sam. It worked."

Fraiser still had a worried look on her face, that part worked but Carter wasn’t out of the woods yet by any means. Okay so she wasn’t going to bleed to death but this wasn’t an ideal, sterile, environment and animal bites nearly always got some degree of infection. Fraiser closed up the wound and injected Carter with the strongest antibiotics she had. She could only hope Carter wouldn’t develop blood poising from a foreign bacteria resistant to Earth drugs.

Sam had been vaguely aware of what was going on during the operation, she was so numb that she hardly felt anything physically. But Fraiser’s warm and optimistic face appearing in front of her muttering nice words lifted the fear. She was exhausted, groggy, cold. Fraiser was smiling and stroking her hair. She didn’t hear what she had been saying, just that it was okay to go to sleep. That sounded like a good idea. She nodded, closed her eyes and gave up the consciousness fight.

* * * * *

O’Neill found himself a small fire off to one side. He sat down and his body language exuded a _leave me alone_ message. It was something Jovic understood. It was tough at the top. O’Neill was a wise leader, but in time of crisis the leader was a lonely man. Jovic understood that.

The old man rose from his place and waving away his normal escort, he tottered over to O’Neill.

"It has been a difficult day, O’Neill," he said. O’Neill stood up, his face contorted with mixed emotions.

"Jovic." O'Neill managed a bow. The old man returned it.

"May I join you?" Jovic asked.

"Sure, sorry." Jack extended his hand inviting the man to sit down.

The old man settled himself as Jack re-took his own seat.

"Will your Major Carter live?"

Jack nodded. "Yes." He paused. "But she was badly injured, there could be…complications."

"Fever is common after divvut attacks. She is a strong woman, O’Neill."

"Yes, she is." The silence hung for a moment, Jack lost in the shimmering flames.

The chief nodded thoughtfully. "I’m sorry, O’Neill, but I must know."

"Know what, sir?" Jack asked innocently.

"Major Carter," Jovic began, "is she the mate of yourself or Doctor Jackson?"

O’Neill’s eyes widened. "Mate, sir?"

"Yes," the old man asked, "she is very dear to you both and that affection is returned." A sudden thought passed through his mind. "Perhaps on your world women take more than one mate at a time. Well you are both lucky men!"

O’Neill couldn’t help smiling, but it was bittersweet.

"Jovic, Carter, Daniel, Teal’c and I are a team. Daniel’s more like a brother to Sam and well, me?" His disappointment was clear. "She’s not my mate either."

Jovic was bemused. "Such a wonderful woman has no mate!" It was an impossible concept. Jovic leaned over to whisper to him. "You are the leader, you should insist she becomes your mate."

O’Neill shook his head. "Doesn’t work like that, sir, she’s free to choose who she wants, if she wants."

Jovic shook his head. "I do not understand, O’Neill, your customs are strange."

"You should talk to Daniel Jackson, sir, he’s better at explaining stuff like this."

Jovic nodded, indeed.

"I do know O’Neill that yours are a kind, resourceful and generous people. I look forward to seeing your world. It is only a matter of time, I assure you."

_  
_

God, I hope we all get to show it to you.

Jovic let the silence hang in the air.

"Her father is here, is he not?"

O’Neill nodded.

"I should like to meet him."

"He’s not too well right now, but I’ll be sure and introduce you when he’s better."

Jovic nodded, satisfied. "Your Doctor Fraiser is a very good healer, O’Neill." 

Jack met his gaze. "They’re all the best at what they do, but we’re making this up as we go along. It’s gonna take some time."

Jovic nodded. "You have plucked us from the edge, O’Neill. We waited for salvation with no hope for many months. Then you came." He shrugged. "So, we must wait a little longer. Now, we have hope and we have your weapons and men. Now, we can hunt more easily. We can show your men the best hunting grounds for blago. We will have plenty to eat."

O’Neill didn’t quite realize what the man was telling him. "You normally hunt the blago?"

"Oh yes, O’Neill, but they have grown stronger over the generations. The cost of hunting a single blago was often great, and took many days. First we would have to wound it, then track it for a few days until it was weak enough to kill. But your weapons, it is so quick, we can probably survive the rest of the winter, no one will go hungry."

Blago tasted better than MREs anyway, so this wasn’t a food problem any more. It was a medical problem. Fraiser’s supplies were dwindling. He wasn’t sure how long Carter would need painkillers or antibiotics. The urgency still remained in his mind, if only for her sake.

"I will leave you, O’Neill." Jovic rose, his aides appeared and led the old man away. Jack was left standing over the fire.

Ferretti hovered. O’Neill beckoned him over.

"Sorry sir, thought you should know."

"What is it, Louis?"

"Blizzard, sir, it’s back."

O’Neill raised is eyebrows. "Great. Everyone…"

"Is inside, all secure, watches organized and SG-11 reports dinner will be ready in half an hour."

O’Neill glanced over, they were getting ready to start cooking.

"Sir," Ferretti continued, "everyone’s asking about Major Carter."

O’Neill patted him on his arm. "Let’s go check on her, then we can spread the word." They walked together back to the medical tent.

Daniel had her cradled in his arms, he was stroking her hair as she slept. As they came in, Daniel managed a smile. "She’s warming up, Jack. Her leg’s holding up too."

Jack squatted down and brushed some hair out of her eyes. "She looks good, Danny." He nodded.

"So, Doc?"

"So?"

"So, how’s she doing?"

"I’ve fixed the artery, the rest of the bleeding has stopped, but she’s not out of the woods yet. The artery could get blocked, it’ll be a miracle if it doesn’t get infected, and…" O’Neill silenced her with one of his glares. He took her shoulders in his hands.

"You did a good job, Doc. Let’s cross those other bridges when we come to them, okay?"

She nodded. "She’s stable for now. She lost a lot of blood, but the transfusions have helped. She needs rest, warmth and food. I’ll try and get her to eat something later."

"How’s Whitney?"

She smiled, and waved at the young man, huddled in blankets his feet propped up on a crate. He waved back. "He’s fine," she said, "apparently hates needles. Doesn’t normally give blood. He’s a brave kid."

"He’ll have to get used to needles at the SGC, Doc."

"That’s what I told him. I think he’ll cope."

"You keeping him in?"

"No, just needs someone to keep an eye on him for a while."

"Ma’am." Ferretti took responsibility instantly.

"Make sure he has plenty of hot, sweet, drinks, and stays in tonight." The doctor added.

Ferretti nodded. "Come on, Whitney, you’re being rescued." 

"We’re all staying in, Doc. The blizzard’s back," O’Neill informed her.

She sighed as Whitney extracted himself, dressed and left.

"You’re about to tell me we could be here for a while. How long?"

He shrugged. "SG-7 didn’t have much luck today. Could be they’re looking in the wrong place, but…" his voice trailed off and he shrugged. "When you gonna run out of supplies?"

"We’re getting through antibiotics at an alarming rate, but that’s mostly on the Hladans. Three days. The IV stuff? If it’s just Sam, ten. But I don’t want to leave it that long, and I might have to up the dose. I’d say we have five days max before we start getting into trouble." She looked back at Sam. "If it doesn’t hold…"

"It’ll hold, and we’re going home – soon, Doc."

"Please," she implored, "make them be more careful, Colonel. We can’t afford any more serious injuries."

He nodded. "I will. Look, I’m gonna call a pow-wow again, can you come?" She nodded. "Fifteen minutes, main tent."

Ferretti brought Whitney with him. Parked him in the corner with a cup of coffee and his dinner (blago of course) and told him to eat. He was hungry, so it was an easy order to obey.

O’Neill looked round to check everybody was there.

"Where the hell’s Teal’c?"

Fraiser answered. "He’s with Jacob and Sam, Colonel." _He needs to be alone,_ her eyes added.

"Oh." He’d see about that in a minute. "So, kids, we’re still here. What’s going on?"

Max King shrugged, Daziel answered for him. "Dialing up didn’t work. Nothing. No sound, no vibration, no vortex, no nothing."

"King?"

"Too much interference from the base rocks, like Carter said there’d be."

"Are we looking in the right place?" Gilbert asked. "I mean how far could it have gone? Maybe the DHD’s too far away from the gate."

Daziel and King nodded. "But if that’s the case, it’s got to be somewhere over here." Daziel had scribbled a drawing of the valley floor showing the position of the gate before the avalanche and the cave entrance with the DHD. He drew an arc. "It worked at this distance, so it must be beyond this arc. That means it would have moved nearly a half mile from its original position."

"Is that possible?" O’Neill asked their avalanche expert.

Whitney was chewing. "Just nod, kid." 

He did, swallowed and added "The whole thing’s about one and a half miles long from the front edge to the base of the mountain. If it’s there, that’ll narrow our search and the snow’s thinner near the leading edge."

"So we move the DHD down that way, and try again?"

"Yes, Colonel," Daziel answered sounding more positive. "But..."

"Now why do I get the feeling I’m not going to like this ‘but’?"

"Sorry, sir, Little got the UAV up again and he’s been watching this front. It’s bigger than the last one."

"How long?"

"Two maybe three days before it clears."

Gilbert chimed in. "We killed three more blago while you were out, Colonel, we have plenty of food and power to last at least six days in here."

"So we sit it out again?"

"Yes, sir," Gilbert offered. "Once we find the gate, my guys will have it out and up in hours, sir. We’ll be able to get some supplies from Earth and even maybe send a few people back straight away."

Fraiser visibly relaxed.

"Okay, review your wish lists. Doc, you get priority." She nodded.

"Everyone else let’s rest. I’ll brief the troops over dinner." The smell was wafting round the complex again. O’Neill’s stomach rumbled. "I’m hungry…let’s eat!"

Fraiser approached O’Neill as the others left. "Colonel?"

"He's in ‘guilt’ mode, right?"

She nodded. "He thinks he failed her."

"It was an accident, Doc. He shot six of ‘em!"

"Just talk to him, Colonel. I’ve tried already."

"Sure Doc."

**  
**

19

Drifting, she seemed to be doing a lot of that recently. Drifting from one crisis to the next. One deep, dark, hole in her mind to another.

It wasn’t cold here, that was something and she didn’t feel alone. It was dark. She opened her eyes slowly, trying to orientate herself again. There was someone behind her, arms wrapped round her, she froze, suddenly terrified. The body moved and moaned softly. She exhaled. _Daniel,_ she knew that noise anywhere. She stole a glance over her shoulder just to make sure. The movement hurt.

As her mind awoke the pain drifted into her consciousness, searing, jabbing pain. She flexed her leg. _Ow!_ the pain arced up through her entire body.

"Shit," she muttered, her hand moved to the site of the pain. The back of her thigh was heavily bandaged.

"Hi, Sam." Her father’s face appeared at her bedside.

"Hi, Dad." Her voice was almost horse. Her throat dry.

Jacob squatted down on a box and folded his arms in front of him. "Are you avoiding me?" he asked flatly, "or just trying to get yourself killed?"

She wasn’t quite with it enough to understand what he was talking about. She hurt, she was tired, why the hell was her father starting on her too?

She blinked groggily. "Dad? I don’t…"

"Never mind, kid, you’re probably still strung out on morphine."

She shook her head, "hurts, Dad." She rubbed at her leg under the sleeping bag.

Daniel stirred and rubbed his eyes. "Sam?"

"She’s awake, Daniel."

"How you doing, Sam?"

"Hurts…" She drifted again. Fraiser entered the tent.

"Good timing as ever, Doctor," Jacob said brightly. "Sam’s awake."

Fraiser smiled. "Is she now?" She knelt by the cot and smiled. "Hi, Sam, how are you feeling?" Fraiser fiddled with her stethoscope, warming the end up before listening to her chest.

Sam started to say something but couldn’t form the words. "It’s all right, Sam. Are you thirsty?" She nodded. "I’ll get you some water. You need to drink as much as you can."

"My leg?"

Fraiser nodded. "So far so good," she said brightly. "Does it hurt much?" Sam nodded. "Okay, I’ll get you some more morphine. Do you think you could try and eat some soup?"

She shrugged. That depended on if she could keep her eyes open. "Well, we’ll try. Daniel, could you go get some, please. And make sure you get something to eat for yourself." 

Daniel yawned and extracted himself from the sleeping bag. Fraiser threw a look at Jacob. "I’ll go with you," he said, "let the ladies sort themselves out."

Fraiser smiled a thank you as the men left.

"They’re gone, Sam. Drop the groggy act."

She closed her eyes and rubbed her face. "It does hurt, Janet."

"I’ll bet it does, but you can’t avoid him for ever. He’s a lot better now. He wants to spend some time with you. Dammit, that’s why he came." She offered her a canteen of water. "Drink it slowly," she ordered as she started to check her over. "Temps back up, Sam, that’s good." Sam nodded okay, sipping from the canteen.

"Can I sit up?"

"You can try, but it might pull your stitches, just go easy."

"Daniel, General, everything okay?" O’Neill asked as the two men exited the tent.

"Sam’s awake," Daniel reported brightly.

"How about you?" Jack asked cheekily.

Daniel half smiled and cringed. He was still half a sleep himself. Sam had woken up several times in the night crying. She’d kicked him a few times too. He was feeling a little worse for wear. He yawned. "She was pretty restless." 

Jack nodded understandingly. "Doc sorting her out?"

Daniel nodded. "I’m getting us breakfast, you had some yet?"

"No, I’ll join you. General have you sampled the local fayre yet?"

"No, we’ve been a little preoccupied. Which reminds me, where are the facilities?"

"Just down there, sir. We’ll meet you at the barbecue."

Jacob wandered off.

"Where’s Teal’c?" Daniel hadn’t really seen him since the operation.

"He’s avoiding me. I had to bunk with Ferretti last night," O’Neill informed him. "I think he’s helping SG-11 with their plans for the lifting gear."

"It wasn’t his fault, Jack, they completely surrounded us, we nearly got them all."

"Yeah, well you didn’t get them all in time." O’Neill waved away his own temper. "This whole damned mission is a complete screw-up. We really did not do our homework on this one, Daniel. There’s a lesson to be learned there."

Daniel nodded silently. Lessons indeed. The debriefing was going to be a long one.

"Too busy trying to stop a people from becoming extinct," Daniel supplied matter of factly. "We couldn’t have waited much longer than we did to help these people, Jack. It’s only now they’re starting to brighten up themselves."

"Yeah. Look, I’ll talk to him, Danny, but let’s eat first." Jack and Daniel reached the now familiar barbecue and waited for Jacob. 

"Could be worse, Jack," Daniel offered as they made their way back. "We could have just MREs to eat." 

That forced a smile onto Jack’s face. "Don’t you miss my MRE stew?"

"Nope." They both laughed a little.

"MRE Stew?" Jacob wondered. "Now there’s a concept."

"You must try it some one day, General, its great."

Daniel made a sour face and shook his head from behind O’Neill.

"Daniel?" Jack didn’t turn his head but knew what was going on from the smirk in Jacob’s eyes.

"Hey, I gotta get some soup for Sam." Daniel changed the subject quickly. They stopped off and then headed back to the medical tent.

Stopping at the door, Jack knocked dramatically. "Rrrroom service!"

It made them both smile, even though Sam’s was colored by the pain that lanced through her leg as Fraiser helped her sit up. "Just a minute!" Fraiser called. 

Sam was in a slight state of undress. She zipped up her jacket and finished folding the sleeping bag over her lap. "How’s my hair look?" she asked. Fraiser smiled sympathetically and popped the woolly hat back on. 

"That bad, huh?" Carter shifted her weight uncomfortably.

"Sam?"

"It’s fine, just sore."

"Okay, ready for the influx?"

Sam nodded. "You can come in now guys."

"Goooood morning campers!" Jack exclaimed in his usual bright and cheery voice. "Breakfast is served!"

"Morning, Colonel," they both replied together. 

The first waft of the blago turned her stomach but she forced it away. _Irrational_. _Go away._ It went. She hardly missed a beat. None of them noticed anything and Carter surprised everyone with how hungry she was, even herself.

Fraiser ushered them out soon after they had finished eating. She settled Carter back down in the cot and moved the tent’s heater closer to her. "Nap time," she said simply. Carter’s eyes were bobbing shut anyway, she stopped trying to keep them open and slipped away.

* * * * *

O’Neill caught up with Teal’c in the engineering tent. "Teal’c?" he asked quietly, "Could I have a word?"

Teal’c nodded reluctantly and followed his CO out of the tent.

"Not seen you for a while, Teal’c," he started as they wandered across the cavern floor.

"I have been assisting SG-11, O’Neill," Teal’c stated.

"How’s it going?"

"The A-frame is ready for assembly. The plan is a sound one."

"Good," Jack said. He stopped by a small fire off from the main groups. "Let’s sit."

Teal’c sunk down, remaining stiff.

Jack squinted at the man. "It wasn’t your fault, Teal’c."

"Major Carter was under my supervision. She was my responsibility and she was injured."

"It was an accident, Teal’c."

"Still, I was responsible…"

"Oh crap!" he barked. "Daniel’s told me what happened, there were too many of them. I’m the one who should be feeling guilty, dammit, I was off wandering."

"You were checking on SG-2. As their Commanding Officer, it is part of your responsibility to do this."

O’Neill grabbed his head in his hands. "Teal’c, don’t start beating yourself up over this. It’s done, it’s happened, now we have to get home. Carter doesn’t need us doing the guilt thing, okay?"

"I must apologize," he said simply, his head bowed slightly.

"Well I know she’ll forgive you but she’s asleep right now. So, it’ll have to wait."

Teal’c raised his head in that regal manner he had. "Major Carter has a high capacity for forgiveness."

"Yes, she does."

"I will speak with her when she awakens."

"You do that."

O’Neill spotted Jacob across the cavern. He had been putting this off. It couldn’t wait any longer. He had a promise to keep. "Look, I have to tell Jacob about … you know…."

"I will accompany you."

O’Neill’s hand rested on the larger mans shoulder as he rose. "Thanks, Teal’c."

**  
**

20

"Jacob, can I talk to you for a minute?" O’Neill’s voice was soft and cautious. 

"Sure, Jack, what can I do for you?" O’Neill motioned that he wanted to go somewhere else. They needed privacy for this. It wasn’t common knowledge and he wanted it to stay that way.

Jacob reluctantly rose to follow him.

They found a quiet branch of the caves and Teal’c stood guard some way off to ensure they were not disturbed.

"General," O’Neill began, "I have something that I need to tell you, about Sam."

Jacob eyed the officer skeptically. "What?"

"There isn’t really an easy way to tell you this but Sam’s asked me to fill you in on what happened on P4T3DY."

Jacob folded his arms in front of him. "Martouf told me you were captured and that Sam was beaten up like the rest of you. He fixed her up. She was fine."

Jack shifted from one foot to another. "That’s not the whole story."

Jacob drew himself up to his full height. "Then what is the whole story?"

O'Neill hesitated.

"Colonel?"

"We were split up soon after we were captured," he started, "we didn’t see Sam for a couple of days. When we did, she’d been beaten up pretty bad. SG-3 and 6 rescued us that night."

Jacob was solider, he knew the risks. Jack saw the horror pop into his mind. Selmak reached out and comforted it, calmed it.

"What happened?" he managed. "What did they do to her?"

O’Neill blinked and flinched as he said the words. "They tortured her, General, and…" he paused. "She was raped."

Jacob’s eyes shone with disbelief, he was about to lash out at Jack when Selmak stepped in. Jacobs’ eyes glowed and his voice changed.

" _Please, O’Neill, we have been here for two days, tell us why we were not told of this before_."

"Sam was going to tell you herself, but she’s been having some problems talking about it. I mean she didn’t even tell us at the time, she was worried we’d do something stupid. She was right, I probably would have. Anyway, she only told us about it a few days ago, she kept it a secret. It was messing with her head. But she’s, well she’s got enough to worry about right now and I know you’re gonna have a lot of questions that she doesn’t need to be asked so I offered to tell you for her," he blurted. Strangely it was easier to say all that to Selmak than it would have been to Jacob. 

" _We thank you for your candor. Please leave us, so that we may assimilate this information_."

"Okay, I’ll be in the cavern if you want me." O’Neill left quickly, asking Teal’c to stay and make sure they were not disturbed. He hadn’t counted on Selmak smoothing the way for him, but those questions were sure to come. He had the answers ready anyway.

_  
_

They were so closely linked they knew what the other was thinking and feeling. Selmak was doing the thinking, Jacob the feeling.

_  
_

She is still your daughter and she needs your love and support. Not accusations or questions. What she must say she will say when she can. Her recovery will take time. Do not try to assign blame to any except those who committed the atrocity. Release the anger you hold within us.

Jacob regained control of his emotions and rose from where he had sunk down the wall.

"We were gone too long, Selmak."

_  
_

Do not blame us either, Jacob! We have responsibilities and we did not know what had happened. You cannot be with her all the time.

"I can’t protect her."

_  
_

No one can, Jacob. It is the way of the universe. Evil is a constant danger. We, as warriors, are placing ourselves in that danger every day. Selmak had seen enough of the galaxy to know what people were like. She had been on the receiving end of some of it herself. Those memories were normally hidden She shared them with Jacob, and an understanding settled on him. It didn’t detract from the horror, the sickness, but he drew strength from Selmak’s resolve…

"Oh Jesus."

_  
_

You must grieve for this Jacob, but you must be strong for her. 

Jacob rubbed at his eyes, blotting the few tears that had escaped. It was a father’s worst nightmare.

_  
_

She is a strong woman, Jacob, you have raised her well. She will prevail. Let us go to her now.

He composed himself and headed back to the cavern calmly. He passed Teal’c without a word and headed straight for the medical tent. 

He settled back in the seat beside her cot. Daniel had gone, they were alone. She looked so peaceful, so young, like she was still a teenager… His mind wandered back to the day she joined the air force. He was proud, he was worried, but how could he deny her her dream of being an astronaut, her dream that involved an organization he’d dedicated his own life to. The situation had been reversed a year ago. She had asked him into her world, her galaxy. It had saved his life and moved him into a whole new way of living. ‘Whiz satellite geek’, he always knew there was more to this child of his. _To this woman…_ Selmak corrected, _She is a woman in her own right, Jacob._

He couldn’t help the tears from forming at his eyes. Selmak reached out and comforted him again. 

_  
_

She is strong, like you, Jacob. She will be fine.

Jacob shook his head sadly. "I understand Selmak, but I don’t have to like it, do I?"

_  
_

No you do not.

They sat there for a while, just being together. 

When she awoke, he stared into her eyes and smiled. "Hi, Sammy."

The sadness in his eyes betrayed him. "He told you?"

Jacob nodded, she seemed relieved. "It doesn’t matter, Sam, you’re still my kid. I still love you. I’m just so sorry I wasn’t here for you."

She started to cry. "That’s okay, Dad." They looked at each other for a few seconds. "Can I have a hug?"

"Sure." He held her and as he did the tap turned on. She told him everything, more than even Jack knew. Jacob let her talk until she was done. He comforted her as Selmak silently comforted him.

The pain was deep. The frustration clear. But the wounds were closing, the healing had begun.

* * * * *

"You are troubled, O’Neill." It was Jovic. 

_  
_

How does he manage to keep appearing like that? O’Neill rose respectfully. "Good day, Jovic. I am fine, Thank you sir."

Jovic tottered over to a box and sat down. "You do not look fine." He smiled. "It is your Major again. Did her father refuse your request for her hand?"

_  
_

Oh I wish that was it Jovic. I wish. "No sir, as I explained…"

Jovic waved him silent. "I am only playing, O’Neill. Your spirit is heavy with responsibility, you need to lighten it."

"I have a responsible job, sir. All these people follow my orders, it’s my job to get them home safely."

"And you will, O’Neill. We have hope, we have faith. And we have you." Jovic jabbed a finger at him as he rose and tottered away, pausing to talk to his people as he made his way back to his tent.

Ferretti cautiously wandered over.

"Sir?"

O’Neill looked up and then back down at his feet. "What is it, Major?"

"Sir, I was thinking that we’ve got a lot of time on our hands here, and well the men are getting a little stir crazy." 

"Idle hands…"

"Something like that. Maybe we should organize something."

"Like what? More snow shoes?"

"No sir, everyone’s got a pair, some guys two."

"So, what are you suggesting?"

"I dunno sir, something fun but useful. I couldn’t actually come up with much myself, I was hoping you’d have some ideas."

"Ideas… let me think about it. I’ll get back to you." _Go away._

Ferretti knew that look. "Yessir." He muttered and left.

* * * * *

Jacob settled round the fire with Daniel, Jack and Teal’c. The silence hung in the air for a few minutes. "She’s a survivor, Jack." Jacob said simply.

"She told you everything?"

Jacob nodded. Then he half smiled. Jack thought it inappropriate but who was he to say. "She asked me to tell you something."

"What?"

"That Martouf found out when he healed her."

"Martouf knew and didn’t say anything?" Daniel was clearly furious, voicing the same question that popped into Jack’s head. His expression said it all.

Jacob patted Jack’s knee soothingly. "Don’t worry, I’ll be having words. But they have history, Jack, and she made him promise not to tell. Martouf is very loyal to his friends."

"But if he’d said something we could have helped her sooner," Daniel complained.

"But she didn’t want to be helped, did she, Daniel? She’s stubborn. Look, the right and wrong can be debated, and don’t worry it will." _We’ll see about that Jacob…_ He fiddled with a stick poking it in the fire absentmindedly as Selmak lectured him.

He capitulated. 

"This was supposed to be an easy mission wasn’t it." Jacob commented.

"Yup."

"Kinda messed that up, didn’t we?"

O’Neill shrugged. "Hammond would have dialed up in a couple hours anyway. At least you made it through. You’re here. That means a lot to Sam, sir."

He nodded. "So, when are we blowing this joint?"

"When the blizzard stops we’ll start looking for the gate. SG-11 are working on a plan to get her through ASAP. Fraiser wants that leg seen to."

"Martouf had the healing device. We should have brought one each. I could have fixed it straight away."

"There’s a lot of stuff we _could_ have brought with us, Jacob. A hell of a lot of stuff…" The thought lingered in his mind for a moment and a plan formed. 

"Jaack?" Daniel could see something processing behind those eyes. "What are you thinking?"

"I just had an idea, Daniel." Jack climbed to his feet. "Where’s Ferretti?"

* * * * *

"Listen up, kids!" O’Neill called the gathered SG teams to order.

"Welcome to Day Four of the ‘SGC Hladan Summer Excursion’. Hope everyone’s having a good time so far." He smirked and silenced the few dissenting voices. "Just thought I’d give you all a little update on our _situation_. It’s still snowing."

"No shit!"

"Now, now, kids, things are not as bad as you think. We’ve got plenty of food in here to last us a few more days. When the blizzard stops we’ll be out there like a shot, dial up and whoosh. Find the gate." God, he hoped it would be that simple.

"Now, I know for a lot of you this is your first gate trip, and things probably haven’t gone the way you expected..."

"Welcome to the SGC!" a veteran from SG-11 chortled. His fellow veterans smiled.

"Yeah, yeah, I know. Believe me _I know_. So far we’ve scraped through with just one pretty serious injury. But you’ll all be pleased to know that Major Carter is doing just fine. A small cheer erupted.

"Now, kids, there’s a fair amount gone wrong on this mission and part of that is our lack of experience in exploring polar environments. So I gotta little task for you all. We’re gonna write a training manual, guys: ‘The SGC guide to exploring polar planets!’"

There was a slight groan.

"I thought you’d react that way, so, here’s the thing. We’re gonna have a competition. In your SG teams, I want to know what - with the benefit of hindsight - you would have brought with you and what you’d have left behind. It can be anything: objects, supplies, personnel, but please, keep it clean, we are in mixed company." He smiled at the only female officer present in the cavern. Annie grinned back.

"I want to know what you wish you knew before you came and how you would have found it out. I don’t want to be making the same mistakes next ice planet, guys, so let’s get our heads together and make something positive outta this." The crowd rumbled.

"PRIZES," he silenced them, "will be awarded at the ‘Hladan reunion barbecue' to be held at my place, date to be confirmed. They will be awarded for innovation, practicality, wit and, no doubt, stupidity." That raised a laugh. "The judge’s decision will be final, and I am the judge." He paused. "You have three hours, submit your lists to Daniel, don’t forget to put your names on the top. Otherwise you can’t win." He smiled.

He waved them to begin. The cavern dissolved into knots of discussion. There were smiles, serious expressions and lots of scribbling. Daziel and Ferretti were having a terse discussion. Whitney stood beside Ferretti looking very agitated, glancing at his SG-2 friends.

"Hey, Daziel!" O’Neill called out. "You didn’t bring him, he’s SG-2 for this exercise."

The rest of SG-2 cheered and Whitney happily settled in with his buddies. They had a real chance of getting somewhere with this one. 

"So what do we do, Jack?" 

"Make a list, Daniel. We just can’t win a prize. Might be seen as favoritism."

Fraiser appeared at the door to her tent, she beckoned them over, all of them.

"Sam’s fed up, she wants to play too." 

"Can she?"

"She’s a lot better." _She’s driving me nuts_. "You can take the cot out and park her by the fire. No getting up, keep her warm and try and get her to eat something."

"Cool!" Daniel brushed past her. "Hey, Sam, wanna come out and play?"

She laughed. "Sounded like you guys were having too much fun without me."

"Not true, Major! How could we. You ready to rumble?" O’Neill led the count. They lifted the cot as was and carried it out to their fire, they started to lower it but she stopped them. 

"Turn it the other way round, then I can see everyone." They did as they were told. Settled her with a pad and pencil and started on their own lists.

Carter wriggled on the cot, trying to get into a more comfortable position. It didn’t really work, only earning her a stabbing pain and several concerned looks from SG-1 and her father.

Her list was pretty short, just a few things she would have brought if she had known she was going to be staying for a day or two. But top of her list was the same as Jacob’s – ‘Healing Device – 1’. _Wonderful thing hindsight._

"Snap!" Jacob said, leaning over to peek. She managed a smile.

The lunch barbecue started up. Teal’c retrieved some MREs and started to heat them on their fire. Carter found her mind wandering as she stared into the yellow-orange flames. A sudden flashback of Daniel being consumed by fire started her back to reality. She twisted to check the voice arguing with O’Neill about the ketchup-mustard-blago issue was really him. Reassured, she pulled off her cap. It was warm down here so close to the fire. Who cared what her hair looked like?

"Put that back on, Major," O’Neill ordered.

"I’m too hot," she moaned.

O’Neill rocked off his box and knelt beside her. He grabbed the cap and unceremoniously pushed it back onto her head. Her fringe stuck out over her eyes.

"You need a haircut, Major," he started, pushing the wayward bits under her hat. She squirmed away from him. His fingers brushed her face as she moved.

"Jesus, Carter," he exclaimed, pulling off his glove and feeling her forehead. "You’re burning up!"

Her hand shot out and pulled the hat off again. "I said, I was hot!" She slapped his hand away.

"Teal’c, get Fraiser."

"What? I’m fine, it’s just sitting close to the fire."

O’Neill repositioned his hand on the forehead, then felt the side of her face. "No, Carter, you’ve got a fever."

Daniel now leant over her. "Sam?"

"I’m fine guys, just warm," she almost gasped.

Daniel grabbed her wrist and felt for her pulse. His eyes widened.

"What?" Jack asked

"It’s really fast."

Sam wrenched her hand away. "Cut it out!"

Fraiser practically ran across the cavern and skidded to a halt.

"Sam?"

"She’s got a fever. Heartbeat’s fast too," O’Neill supplied.

Fraiser laid her hand on her patient. She cursed inwardly. "Get her back in the medical tent." Carter protested uselessly as they lifted her cot and carried her back across the cavern. 

Everything Fraiser had been praying wouldn’t happen, was. Over the next few hours, Carter’s temperature rose even higher and her blood pressure dropped – both steadily. As Sam become more incoherent, Fraiser gave her another massive dose of antibiotics and hooked up an IV. It was all she could do, and deep down she knew it wasn’t going to be enough. She’d used every trick available to her. They had to get her home, or at least get some supplies here. 

And they had to do it quickly … very quickly.

**  
**

21

O’Neill didn’t need to ask the obvious question. Fraiser’s face said it all. "How long has she got?" he asked instead.

Fraiser shrugged. "It came on very quickly, her BP seems to be stabilizing, but..."

"But?" Daniel pressed.

"Whatever is causing the infection isn’t very susceptible to the drugs I have here."

"How long?" O’Neill forced.

Fraiser’s heart sank. "Twenty-four hours, maybe. I don’t know."

"What if we get her home?"

"She has a chance, but, Colonel, that’s not possible right now is it?"

"The hell it isn’t!" O’Neill stomped away, followed by Teal’c. Daniel hovered, not sure which way to turn.

"Daniel, until the snow lets up, you can’t let them go out there, it’s too dangerous."

"I can’t just sit here and wait for her to die, Janet. I won't." His decision made, he bolted after Jack.

"General," she pleaded. "Sam wouldn’t want anyone else getting hurt trying to help her."

"We’ll be careful," he said as he followed them.

Their outdoor gear on, SG-1 and Jacob Carter gathered at the cave entrance. It was still snowing lightly, but the sentry noted the wind had eased off. The blizzard was subsiding. You could almost see across the flow to the slowly setting sun..

"A break at last," O’Neill muttered.

Ferretti skidded into O’Neill. "Sir," he said breathlessly, "what’s going on?"

"We’re gonna find the gate." O’Neill stated.

"But sir?"

"The sun’s going down, so I’m not ordering anyone to help us, but Carter’s run out of time. It’s easing off."

"Sir," Ferretti started, "the blago could still get close."

"Anything happens, you’re in charge, Louis."

"But, Colonel?"

"I have to try." He turned and was gone. Teal’c, Daniel and Jacob followed him.

"Daniel!" Ferretti called out, waving a small black remote. "You’ll need this."

He tossed it over. "The DHD’s on the FRED. Give me a minute. We’ll be on your six!" 

Daniel drove the FRED out, down-flow as they had planned. O’Neill, Jacob and Teal’c fanned out, MP5s at the ready, scanning the area. The blago were hard to spot, but not impossible. They were ready.

"This should do, Jack!" Daniel stopped and jumped up onto the FRED. Flexing his fingers, he slapped the first symbol.

They listened. Nothing.

Just as O’Neill realized he didn’t know what to listen for, Ferretti called out from the cave entrance. The SGC personnel were behind him all plodding along in their home made snow shoes. O’Neill started back to them. "Major!"

"Sir, I figure we got an hour of light left, it’s worth a try. It could start snowing again any time!"

Daniel slapped the point of origin, prayed to every deity he knew and pressed the central red plate.

They heard a faint rumble, the ground shook gently beneath them and a few meters from where O’Neill had been standing, the snow mushroomed several feet above the surface and collapsed back on itself, leaving the shimmering event horizon of the wormhole at the bottom of a twenty-foot hole. A huge cheer erupted from the SG teams.

"Daniel!" he called, "where’d you dial?"

"HOME!" Daniel punched in the iris code.

_  
_

"This is General Hammond." O’Neill’s radio squawked.

"General, this is O’Neill."

_  
_

"Good to hear from you again, is Jacob with you, he didn’t make it back with Martouf."

"He’s here, sir. Safe and well. Got buried in the avalanche but he’s okay, we got other problems though, sir." 

_  
_

"What’s your situation?"

"Gate’s horizontal, General. We need supplies. Carter’s been seriously injured, we need to get her home. We’re setting up for that now."

_  
_

"Give us your list, Colonel, we’ll start getting it together."

O’Neill looked around. Daniel had disappeared. Teal’c, Jacob and SG-2 were helping SG-12 move the logs for the A-frame. Little and Daziel were launching the UAV.

"Where’s Daniel?"

"He went to inform Doctor Fraiser." Teal’c supplied.

"O’Neill to Fraiser," he tried.

_  
_

"I read you, Colonel. We’re on our way."

"I need Daniel out here with the list."

_  
_

"On my way, Jack," Daniel’s voice replied.

"Sir," Gilbert started, "we need to move Carter through, right?"

"Yes. Now."

"Okay, we’ll leave the A-frame for now. It’ll take a couple of hours to assemble…"

O’Neill placed a hand on the engineer’s shoulder. "I don’t need to know how, just tell me what you need us to do, and we’ll do it."

"Yes sir. That’s an out-going ‘hole, right?"

"Sure is."

"Good." Gilbert bounded off and briefed the log bearers. 

"We’re moving Major Carter though now?" Whitney asked Gilbert.

"That’s the plan, you’d better help them prep her for a bumpy trip."

"Yes, sir," Whitney broke from the group and dashed back into the cave.

"General, we’re going to be a little busy. Keep the front door open."

_  
_

"Will do, Colonel, good luck."

Gilbert had them lay the logs over the 20-foot hole, so that they would be able to run ropes over them.

"We just lower her through?" O’Neill asked.

Gilbert shrugged. "Might not have a soft landing on the other side, but if we lower her slowly, someone should be able to catch her on the other side."

"Mats!" O’Neill exclaimed. "General Hammond, this is O’Neill."

_  
_

"Go ahead, Colonel."

"Sir, we need crash mats on the ramp, from the gym. As many as you can, and quickly."

_  
_

"We’re on it. What’s the plan, Colonel?"

"Sir, we’re gonna lower Carter through. You’ll need to catch her. She’s unconscious, running a fever."

_  
_

"Back up, Colonel, what happened?"

"She was bitten by a wolf type thing. Got her femoral artery. Doc’s tried to fix it but now the wound’s infected. Fraiser’s thrown everything we have at it sir, but Carter’s dying."

_  
_

"What do you need?" 

"Is Martouf there?"

_  
_

"No, son, he had to return to Vorash."

"Break out the healing device, General, Jacob’s gonna need it. We’ll send them both back."

_  
_

"Carry on, Colonel."

He saw them picking their way through the tracks of the FRED and the pole bearers. Whitney ran ahead to O’Neill, nearly tripping over his own shoes. "Sir, we should probably lower someone through first to get an idea of how she’s gonna come through the other side."

"I need you here, Whitney."

"I know, sir, I was thinking about Jimmy Taylor."

"Taylor? Oh, mother-in-law from hell?"

"Yes, sir."

"Rig him up." O’Neill checked his watch. "We haven’t got much time, Whitney. Just 20 minutes to get them all through. Step on it." 

"Yes, sir." Whitney bounded off calling out to Taylor. The two men had a brief exchange during which Taylor hugged his team-mate, then Whitney started rigging a rope harness around his friend.

O’Neill heard his radio crackle, Fraiser was jabbering to Warner in medic speak. He didn’t understand what half of it meant but it didn’t sound positive.

"No, I tried that, Bill, 1000 milligrams every four hours, hasn’t touched it. You’ll have to do cultures, mean time, Jacob’s her only hope."

_  
_

"We’ll take good care of her, Doctor Fraiser," the voice crackled.

"I know… Fraiser out." She knelt down beside her patient again and checked her pulse. It was weak but stable.

"Okay, General, here we go, lowering Taylor, now."

Taylor shimmied off the edge of the snow, as the men took the strain on the ropes. Many Hladans had joined their new allies and Jovic was slowly making his way out to them as well. Whitney directed the teams as Jimmy swung free from the side and hung suspended over the shimmering event horizon. 

"Give Sally a hug from us!" Whitney called, as the airman’s feet slowly disappeared.

General Hammond watched from the base of the ramp. Marines crouched on the piled up mats watching the event horizon for any signs of someone coming through. The soles of his boots appeared first and before he knew it, he was being supported by many hands. Once he left the grip of the wormhole, his full weight bore down on them, he dipped and they placed him lightly on the mats.

"O’Neill, we have him safe and sound, send them through just like that: feet first."

Jack glanced at Whitney. They had planned to lower Carter on the cot, not feet first. 

"Standby, General."

"Get her out of the cot and the bag." Whitney was fumbling with a length of rope, turning it into a large loop. Jacob was waiting in a harness similar to Taylor’s, but that would cut across Carter’s injured leg. "Under the shoulders?" Jacob asked.

"Yes sir, we’ll clip her to you."

"General, we gotta send Jacob and Carter through together, can you guys handle that?"

_  
_

"Will do, Jack. We’re ready."

The sun had dipped halfway behind the horizon casting an orange glow over the snow and ice. Shimmering blue light shone from the hole as Jacob held his daughter close to him and lifted her over the edge. He clambered over as they took the strain on the ropes. Her head flopped back as she hung limp and lifeless, he cradled it next to his chest. Slowly they disappeared into the blue light.

_  
_

"We have them!" Hammond’s voice barked over the radio. They cheered and clapped each other on the back until their celebrations were drowned out by a blago roaring in the distance. The silence that fell on the humans clattered as many MP5s were cocked ready.

"General! We’re losing the light here. We’ll dial up at dawn and give you an update."

_  
_

"Jacob’s working on Sam now, Jack. We’ll get the supplies you've requested together and start moving it through tomorrow."

"We gotta get back inside now, sir, the wildlife is getting restless. O'Neill out"

_  
_

"Good Luck Colonel. Hammond out"

Gilbert ordered them to move the poles off the hole so they wouldn’t get vaporized when they dialed up again. That done, the teams and their Hladan helpers fell back into the safety of the cave taking the DHD laden FRED with them.

The sun finally disappeared behind the mountain casting the flow into darkness and bitter cold. O’Neill lingered by the entrance to the cave and stared at the hole in the snow. It was going to take a while to dig it out. At least she was home, he mused. They couldn’t do any more for her than they had. It was up to Jacob now.

"I’m sure she’ll be all right, Jack." Daniel stood just behind him hugging himself. Jack turned to the young man slowly and half smiled. "It’ll take more than a few bugs and a wolf to kill Carter, Daniel. She’s too damn stubborn to die."

They smiled at each other reassuringly and, walking back to the cavern, hoped against hope they were both right.

* * * * *

Jacob worked the device over his daughter’s body as it lay limp and almost lifeless at the bottom of the ramp.

For several minutes, Warner could do little but monitor her vitals as Jacob worked.

Finally, the light from the device faded, Jacob rocked back on his heals and sighed.

"Jacob?" Hammond asked.

"That’s all she can take for now. Doctor, if you have any antibiotics different to Fraiser’s, I’d use them. She’s very weak. She needs all the help she can get."

Warner nodded. "We have a few things to try, but she’s stabilized. Let’s get her to the infirmary."

Jacob rose and watched them wheel Sam away on a gurney. "Gentlemen," Hammond started, looking from Jacob to Taylor and back again. "Can someone tell me what the hell has been going on over the last few days?"

"George, it’s a long story. I’ll fill you in, but this guy has an appointment."

"An appointment? With who?"

"My wife’s having our first kid, sir."

"So you’re Airman Taylor?"

"Yes, sir." 

"I’ve had a Mrs. Fraczek calling me every day, demanding I tell her where the hell you are."

"She’s gonna kill me... Has Sally had it yet?"

"No, Son." Taylor looked relieved then was about to ask a question when Hammond cut him off. "Your wife’s still at the academy hospital. Get yourself through post-gate. I’ll have someone drive you over there. Dismissed."

"Thank you, sir." Jimmy snapped off a salute and bolted from the gate room.

The two generals watched the youth go. "So, how about that long story, Jacob?" They were alone in the gate room now.

"Let’s start with a nice hot shower and some decent food." Jacob turned to his old friend. "We have a lot to talk about, George. And not much of it to do with Hladan."

* * * * *

Jack settled the teams back to their list task before flopping back in front of his own team’s fire. Daniel was still hugging himself, rocking gently back and forth, staring blankly into the flames. Teal’c sat stiffly, his eyes open, deep in thought. 

Jack looked from one man to the other and wished he’d just jumped through the hole after the Carters, damn the hard landing. He didn’t want to be here. He wanted to be there. Looking at his two team-mates he knew they were thinking the same thing. SG-1 without Sam wasn’t really SG-1. Carter left a big hole. All that science, with the instant solider switch. _Sometimes I wish Daniel had one of those…_ He glanced over again to the young scientist who looked on the verge of losing it completely and bursting into tears. O’Neill caught himself mid thought… _Don’t you ever change, Daniel… I need you just the way you are._

Jack rose from his seat by the fire and let his hand linger on Daniel’s shoulder. He pulled at him, beckoning him to follow. They wandered across the cavern to the medical tent. Inside, Janet was alone. She glanced up as they entered and wiped her face guiltily.

Once the door was closed, Jack wrapped his arm around Daniel and let him cry into his shoulder. "She’ll pull thorough, Danny." He rubbed at the man’s back as his own unshed tears made his eyes glisten. "She’ll pull through..." Jack met Janet’s red puffy eyes as he hugged his friend. "She will be okay, Doc," he stated. He couldn’t imagine it any other way. "She’ll be okay…"

* * * * *

The monitors beeped soft and steady. She had fewer tubes than Hammond had expected but she was pale and looked really small and thin. "She’s still a little warm, sir, but everything else is stable. We’ll keep her on the antibiotic cocktail and fluids for now and see how she goes. In the meantime, I’ll run some tests on her leg later today."

"Fraiser did a pretty good job, Doctor, it should be okay." Jacob supplied. "The healing device will make her very tired, it does that when there is no symbiont. She’ll be exhausted for days…" 

He settled in a chair beside her and took her warm, limp hand in his. "Hi Sammy…" he soothed. "We got you home, so you just rest honey… you need to sleep." She stirred slightly and squeezed his hand weakly. "Just go to sleep, Sam. Don’t worry about a thing, just rest. You’re gonna be fine."

**  
**

22

The sky turned from black to blue. As it lightened, the wails of a blago nearby subsided. It had been a very long night. Paxman heaved a sigh of relief when the wailing stopped. Colonel O’Neill strode purposefully up to the cave entrance.

"If you tell me it’s snowing again, I’ll put you on report!"

Paxman smiled. "Not snowed all night sir, been a blago nearby though and he didn’t seem happy."

Jack popped his head out the entrance. The sky was turning from dark to a misty light blue.

"Oh yes!" he celebrated, "We are so getting outta here!"

He trotted back into the cave and despite it being 05.00 hours, woke everyone up. Not surprisingly few complained when confronted with the prospect of going home.

"Come on. Quick breakfasts everyone. Team leaders, bring yours to the main tent. Pow-wow in 15 minutes."

Jack had finished his MRE before the last leader had arrived.

"Right. We got a horizontal gate, at the bottom of a 20-foot hole in the snow, and I want to go home! Gilbert, what’s the plan?"

"We’ll have to dig down the sides so we can lift the gate out. We can scrape the sides and dial up to vaporize the snow – save us hauling it out."

O’Neill sipped his coffee. "Sweet."

"Then, sir, we erect the A-frame, and haul up an end."

"Lemme guess, dial up again and let the vortex hollow out a trench?"

Gilbert smiled. "Exactly. We don’t have to get it out of the hole to get it vertical and accessible. We’ll be able to walk right down to it. Once we get some gear from Earth, we can do something a little more permanent."

"Okay, so what are we waiting for?"

"Orders, sir."

"Let’s get out there and give Hammond an update, then we’ll shut it down and get going."

"Sir?" Little started, "aren’t you going to ask about the weather today?"

O’Neill glared at him "No."

"Well, sir..."

"Ah!" he silenced him.

"Shame, sir, it should be a nice day." Little muttered absent-mindedly.

"No snow?"

Little shook his head and smiled. "Probably not for a couple of days."

Jack’s grin widened. "Yes! Okay, Daniel, Teal’c with me, we’re gonna call home, the rest of you get your teams ready for a briefing. Thirty minutes. Dismissed."

The meeting broke up. Everyone except SG-1 and Fraiser left.

"Come on Doc, we’ll go see how Carter is." 

The four headed out of the complex.

* * * * *

The first thing Carter noticed as she awoke was how warm it was. Not unpleasant, but cozy, secure and safe. Then there was a presence nearby, silhouetted in the dim light.

"Dad?" she wheezed from beneath the mask over her face.

The figure approached her bed, coming into the light. "Hi, Sam," he said softly, squeezing her hand. "How you feeling?"

She closed her eyes, taking stock. "Numb. I’m so tired, Dad."

"I know, Sam, it’s the healing device. It’ll pass."

Her eyes were open again, she looked around at the all too familiar room.

"SGC?" she asked.

"Yeah, Sam. We’re back on Earth. You’re gonna be okay."

"All home?"

"SG-1 are still on Hladan, Sam. You were really sick, we had to get you home."

"Hladan…."

"Yeah," he brushed her hair away from her face, "but they’ll be back soon. You just go back to sleep Sammy, you need to rest."

Her eyes closed slowly. "Okay Dad…"

* * * * *

The four colleagues trudged out over the flow, the morning sun had made the top layer crispy. Suddenly a blago roared.

"That’s close," Daniel stated, stopping the laden FRED. Teal’c and Jack readied their weapons.

"I don’t see anything, Teal’c, you?"

"I do not, O’Neill. Yet I also think it is close by."

They all scanned the flow, right to the mountain slope and horizon. It roared again. They whirled towards the sound. A few hundred yards away, a hole in the snow marked the location of the gate.

"Look, O’Neill." Teal’c pointed to some tracks on the other side leading from the edge of the forest."

"What are those?" Jack asked.

"They appear to be blago tracks, O’Neill."

"Thought so."

"They lead to the gate," Fraiser added.

The roar grew louder as they approached the edge of the hole.

"Stand back, Doc."

O’Neill shuffled slowly to the edge and peeked over. He stumbled back as the white ball of fur and teeth leapt up at him. The snow gave way under him.

"Holy shit, Teal’c!" Jack jumped back from the edge. Teal’c grabbed O’Neill’s jacket and yanked him clear. The snow fell into the hole, annoying the animal even more. It screamed with rage.

"Are you all right, O’Neill?"

"Yeah," he managed, breathless. "Thanks, Teal’c."

Daniel and Fraiser came forward and helped Jack to his feet.

"So, now what do we do?" Janet asked, brushing the loose snow from his clothes.

"Colonel?" O’Neill’s radio squawked. "Sir, are you okay?"

"Fine, Paxman, we got guests."

"O’Neill!" Teal’c’s barked warning was followed by the discharge of a Zat gun. The blago had clawed its way half out of the hole. It fell back, landing at the bottom with a thud. Teal’c cautiously approached the edge and fired a second shot to ensure the animal was dead.

" Vaporize or breakfast?" Jack considered.

Daniel shrugged. "Waste not, want not."

"We will need assistance."

"Paxman, this is O’Neill."

"Go ahead, sir."

"We need some help lifting this blago outta the hole. Have Major Ferretti round us up some bodies."

"On it, sir."

It didn’t really take that long, but it did delay his call home. The team of Hladan and SGC personnel dragged the dead animal back to the cave, leaving them alone again.

"Daniel."

Daniel clambered up onto the FRED and dialed home, praying.

**  
**

23

"Off world activation!"

Hammond bolted from his office.

"Sir, SG-1 signal."

"Thank god. Open the iris."

"Receiving audio, sir." The technician put it on speaker.

"This is Colonel O’Neill, please come in."

"Jack, Hammond. How are you?"

"We’re fine. How’s Carter?"

"Jacob has cleared the infection. She’s very weak, but Dr. Warner assures me she’ll recover." Daniel let out the breath he hadn’t realized he’d been holding and hugged Fraiser. They quietly celebrated.

"That’s great news, General." For the first time in a couple of days, a genuine smile spread across O’Neill’s face and made it all the way to his eyes.

"We’ve got a plan. We should have the gate out in a few hours. We’d appreciate a relief team."

"They’ll be standing by. We’re ready with those supplies, and we’re ready for the Hladan refugees too."

"General, this is Dr. Fraiser. I’d like to send back the day units as we originally planned, but the new medical team will need three medics. There’s too much here for one or two."

"I’ll inform Doctor Warner."

"General, I have to brief the troops. We’ll call you back."

"Good luck, people. Come on home soon."

"Thank you, sir. O’Neill - out. Okay Daniel, let it shut down."

The shimmering light hissed out.

"Let’s get outta here, kids." Together they trudged back to the cave.

* * * * *

A few hours made all the difference. After seemingly days of being numb; numb from the cold, the influence of the drugs and more cold, she was feeling everything again. Her head hurt. Dehydration. Well that made sense because she was thirsty. Oh and while she was thinking about that, she was desperately hungry too. Warner had seen this pattern before, when Martouf had used the healing device on Sam. She’d woken up, eaten and drank enough to feed three, and then been overcome with exhaustion again.

Sam joked with Warner that it was like a stable wormhole, you could only keep it open for about 40 minutes before it shut down. Then she had to sleep for a couple more hours before doing it all again.

"This is so weird," she said, shoveling another mouthful onto her fork. "Dad, why do I get like this?" She chewed. Jacob watched his daughter demolish the second plate of pasta and bolognaise sauce. 

Selmak answered. " _The healing process requires energy. When it is accelerated, the demands are great."_

"So why do I feel so good now, and then crash out?"

" _Your body requires time to heal and absorb the energy you have consumed. In hosts, individuals would require similar cycles but these are consciously controlled by the symbionts."_

"So I’m cycling feast and heal," she said with her mouth full.

"Something like that," Jacob answered. "Here, don’t forget to drink." He handed her a glass of water. She downed it.

"Dad," she started, "could you do me a favor?"

"Like what?" he said suspiciously.

"Send the guys a care package…. Nothing fancy just one of those huge tubs of ketchup with the pump thing."

Jacob laughed. "I’ll see what I can do."

"Oh," she added quickly swallowing. "And some mustard for the Colonel."

"Okay. Anything else?"

She shook her head as she chewed the last mouthful and pushed the plate away.

"That was great, Dad, thanks."

"No problem. Now, before you shut down again, how’s the leg feel?"

She flexed it under the covers. "It’s really sore and stiff too. She rubbed at the bandages and yawned. 

Jacob glanced at the clock. "Thirty-five minutes. Lay down Sam."

She yawned and rubbed her eyes. "You sure they’re not sneaking sedatives in this?" she said sleepily as her father settled her down, careful not to disturb the IVs still pumping her with antibiotics.

"What, in little capsules timed to go off every few hours? Just go to sleep Sam, stop asking so many questions."

"You’ll send the guys that stuff?" she muttered distantly.

"Sure I will. Just as soon as you’re asleep."

"Okay, Dad…" Her head flopped to one side. Warner picked up her chart and made a few notes. 

"That was shorter."

"Got the food on board, not much point in staying up." Jacob stroked her hair, arranging it a little more neatly round her face. "Jack’s right, Sam, you do need a haircut."

* * * * *

The relief crew was due for a three-hour hand over. The day units would then return first with the Hladans who required medical attention. SG teams 7 and 11 volunteered to stay a few days extra. Little and Daziel were keen to keep an eye on things personally. Jack on the other hand, felt very surplus to requirements. He was glad to be leaving Ferretti in charge with his SG-2 detachment. But before then there were supplies to unload and every pair of hands was needed.

The path from the gate was now well trodden. Most of the original strandees had foregone their snowshoes, preferring to trudge back and forth without them.

It was getting on for lunchtime. Jack was hungry, so when the gate was due to shut down, he called a break. Ferretti found his CO with Jovic, discussing the mountains on Earth.

"Er, excuse me, sir, this seems to be for you." Ferretti put the casket down. Jack shrugged and fiddled with the catch. It popped open. Daniel leaned over as Jack pulled out the giant tub of ketchup. "Hey!" he laughed, "I thought you took this off the list!"

Daniel reached in the box and pulled out a folded sheet of paper. He opened it and read, "Dear Jack. Present from Sam – Enjoy!"

Jack fumbled in the box and pulled out the pump top. "Hey, she even sent a pump."

"It’s from Jacob." Daniel rummaged in the packing material as Jack wrestled with the jar’s lid. He grinned. "Look Jack." He held up the second jar and pump.

"Oh yes! Now we’ll know. The Great Ketchup/Mustard Debate ends here!"

They struggled with the caps. Removing their gloves didn’t help.

"If I may." Teal’c took the jar from O’Neill, effortlessly twisting off the cap first time. 

Grumbling quietly, Jack affixed the pump cap. "Only cos I loosened it."

"Thanks, Teal’c," Daniel managed more graciously.

"You are both welcome," he replied with a smug nod.

* * * * *

Fraiser handed over to the new medics and went back ahead of her new patients to smooth the way.

After a quick shower, she escaped Warner’s post-gate intentions and found Sam. She checked her chart carefully and found a similar wake/sleep pattern they’d seen before. Carter was sleeping.

"Doctor."

"I know, Bill. I’ll be right there."

Warner came into the room and stood beside her. "It was close Janet. Without Jacob…"

"I know."

"You did a great job on her leg though, pretty fancy stitching." He paused. "You used suture packs?"

"All I had."

"Saved her life, she would have bled to death. And you must know with an injury like that, it was always gonna get infected."

Fraiser nodded. "Did you send blood for cultures?"

"I got some whilst Jacob was working on her. They’re doing the sensitivities now."

"Penicillin doesn’t work," she said simply. "Let’s hope they find something that will. Hammond’s determined to make a base there for mining."

"She’s responded to the gentamycin. The residual infection’s gone."

"Is that the healing device or the drug?"

Warner shrugged. "Not the time to take a chance to find out."

"She’s in H-DISC?"

"Yes, it’s the same, 40 minutes waking, 2-3 hours sleeping cycle we saw induced by the healing device before."

Fraiser shook her head and shrugged. "That’s interesting. Different injury, same cycle. We’re gonna have to look at this, Bill."

"Yes, Doctor, but right now I could use an extra pair of medical hands out there."

Warner placed his hand on her shoulder. "We’ll figure it out later," he said steering her to the door. "Now let’s get you checked out. Then you can give us a hand with the Hladans."

"I want to talk to her when she wakes up."

"We’ll let the nurses know. Come on, we’ve got a full house."

Fraiser let Warner lead her away. The noise in the infirmary hit her, snapping her back into automatic doctor mode. After a quick check by Warner, she launched herself back into organizing the masses.

* * * * *

Evening had come quickly to the Hladan sky. True to Little’s word, it hadn’t snowed all day. The relief crew was enjoying their first taste of blago and those who weren’t staying were packing up their possessions. The ketchup and mustard had proved popular with the Hladans and Tau’ri alike. So far, ketchup was winning (according to the voting form by the pumps). The atmosphere was light. Jovic was to go to Earth the next day, once his people were settled. Jack was bursting to get back to Earth. He’d never quite felt that way before. He knew she was alive, had been sitting up eating and drinking, but he still needed to see it for himself. Only then could he believe it.

Finally, with the sun almost gone, only SG-1 remained to go through.

"Take care of ‘em, Ferretti."

"I will, sir."

"Keep an eye on that mountain," he told Whitney.

"Yes, sir, I will."

The gate was shimmering before him. He waved to the men staying behind, and collecting Daniel and Teal’c on the way down the trench he muttered, "If Warner can’t muster the fastest post-gate in history, I’ll kill him!"

"I think we should shower before we see Sam, Jack."

Jack shrugged. "Ya think?"

They disappeared through the event horizon.

O’Neill timed Warner. Not quite a record but damned close. The shower, however, was a personal best. Daniel was still drying his hair when Jack slammed his locker door shut. "She’s not gonna care if your hair’s wet, Daniel, come on."

Daniel grumbled, put his glasses on and having shoved everything back in his locker, followed Jack and Teal’c out the door.

The monitors were on, but the sound had been turned off. The lines arced rhythmically and steadily across the screen. The readouts looked good. Heart rate 80, a little fast for Sam, but not worrying. BP okay. Oxygen saturation a little low. That was normal towards the end of the cycle. _Maybe a trigger?_ Fraiser was making notes when they came in.

"Hey, Doc."

"Hello, gentlemen."

"How’s she doing?"

"She’s just fine. In H-DISC, but…"

"H-DISC?" Jack asked.

"Healing Device Induced Sleep Cycles."

"Oh." Daniel had gone round to the other side of the bed, pulled up a chair and sat down, taking her hand.

"She’s sleeping for a couple of hours, then waking to eat and drink. About 40 minutes, then she’ll crash out again."

"When will she wake up?" Jack was on the opposite side to Daniel now, Teal’c planted firmly at the end of the bed at parade rest.

Fraiser checked her watch. "Any time now. Gentlemen, once she wakes up she’ll seem normal and then deteriorate quickly."

"I remember, Doc," Jack said quietly. "She’s okay though?"

"The infection’s gone, but her leg was very badly injured. Even with Jacob’s help, it’s going to take a long time to heal."

"She won’t lose it though," Daniel blurted.

Fraiser shook her head. "Not if I have anything to do with it." She patted Daniel on the shoulder. "It’s not going to be plain sailing, but she’ll live."

Jacob wandered in with General Hammond close behind him.

"Welcome home, SG-1."

"Thank you, sir," Jack managed politely. "Good to be back."

_  
_

Someone was holding her hand, actually squeezing it pretty hard. She pulled away as she awoke. Everything was blurry. Muffled voices, quiet and reassuring, reached her ears. Slowly her eyes cleared, the voices clarified. One face was leaning over her now. She blinked refocusing her eyes.

"Sir?" she croaked.

The face smirked. "Hi, Carter."

She looked round the bed. Daniel was holding her hand gently, a relieved grin spreading across his face. "Hey, Sam."

Her father, cool and calm. No, there was worry in those eyes. "Hey, Sammy. You hungry?"

She nodded, her eyes falling on Teal’c.

"It is good to see you, Major Carter." He inclined his head.

"You too, Teal’c." Her eyes darted back to her dad. "Chocolate," she said absentmindedly, "and is there any more of that pasta I had last time?"

"I’ll see what we can do, Sam, you need to drink some water."

Daniel fussed over the jug and offered her the cup. She missed as he handed it to her.

"Major," Hammond said, "take your time."

"Yes sir." She gripped the cup and squeezed her eyes shut. When they opened the world was one again. Her stomach rumbled.

"Hey, guys." She said brightly, as if she hadn’t spoken to them before. "When did you get back?"

The straw was in her mouth and the cup empty before Jack had finished saying "Less than an hour."

"Janet," she said. "I’m hungry again, could I…"

"We’re working on it, Sam. Pasta and chocolate?"

Sam scowled. "I did it again?"

"It’s okay, Sam." Fraiser patted her shoulder and helped her sit up.

"Did what?" asked Daniel.

"Sam’s a little forgetful when she comes round."

"Then she eats us out of house and home and goes back to sleep," Jacob added.

"Dad," she moaned, "please?"

"I’m just teasing you, Sam. It’s not your fault."

Hammond hovered for a few seconds. "Gentlemen, I’d like to see you all for debriefing, in an hour."

"Yes, sir," Jack said, his eyes not leaving his second in command.

Hammond slipped away, smiling at Sam.

"Did you get the ketchup?" she asked conspiratorially, starting on another cup of water.

"You betcha!"

"Good." She finished the water.

"But the mustard was better!"

"Er, Janet? I, er, kinda need a pit stop."

"Okay, gentlemen, everyone out for a minute. Shoo!" They rose reluctantly. "Now gentlemen. You can come back in a minute."

"Janet," Sam began as she and a nurse helped her. "Are they okay?"

"Just worried ‘bout you, Sam."

"Not hurt?"

"No."

They settled her back, just in time for the arrival of food. She’d already started when Fraiser let the men back in.

"This is great, guys. You should get some later," she said, her mouth full.

Daniel shook his head. "Ten hours ago, you were more dead than alive. Now you’re stuffing yourself like there’s no tomorrow!"

"Give her a break, Danny, she’s hungry."

"Hey, did I miss anything on Hladan?"

"Nope."

"Just Jack nearly getting eaten by a blago," Daniel offered.

"Really?"

"Yeah. It was in the hole with the gate," Jack explained.

"Wow. How’d it get in there?"

"It fell, I guess."

She was nearing the end of the plate.

"Janet? Did you…"

Fraiser uncovered the second plate and set it down in front of her. "You were in luck," she said, handing her a fork. "It was the last piece."

"Doc? How come I never get fed like this?" Jack complained. "Danny, when was the last time you got chocolate cake in here?"

"Chocolate _fudge_ cake," Sam corrected, mopping up some sauce from around the plate, "with hot chocolate sauce." 

"Don’t think I have." Daniel thought about it. "Ever."

"You know, Doc, this is favoritism."

Fraiser smiled sweetly.

"Sam is a very well behaved patient which is more than I can say for the three of you!"

Jacob grinned. "Well brought up." He threw in, ruffling his daughter’s hair.

"Dad!" she batted his hand away.

"Next time – I want chocolate cake!" Jack moaned. "I’m a colonel."

"I’m a colonel." Daniel mimicked in a high pitched voice.

Jack slapped playfully at him across the bed.

"Gentlemen!" Fraiser warned. "See what I mean?"

"Sorry, Doc." Jack looked chastened.

"And you can wipe that stupid grin off your face, Carter." She added.

"Who me?" she asked finishing the last morsel.

"How’s the leg feel?" Jacob asked, seriously

"Numb again."

Jacob frowned. His eyes glowed. _"Doctor, the healing device is not fully effective on injuries with such neurological damage. We must assess their extent."_

"Can’t you zap me again?"

_  
_

"I am afraid not. Beyond what we have already done it may only serve to make the situation worse."

"Oh," Sam managed.

"So what does that mean exactly?" Daniel asked.

_  
_

"There may be loss of sensation and muscle weakness. Rehabilitation will take some time."

"How long?" Jack asked, before Sam could.

_  
_

"It is not certain," Selmak responded.

"Sam," Fraiser interrupted, "with an injury like this, it’s going to be weeks, if not months before you’ll be back to normal, and even then, there might be some residual effects." The color drained from Sam’s face.

_  
_

"It’s too soon to be sure Samantha," Selmak reassured her. _"We will assist the process further if it is appropriate. For now, you must rest."_

"Okay…" Daniel squeezed her hand as an uneasy silence settled.

"Thanks for dropping in, guys, but I’m a little tired," she said finally. 

Fraiser glanced at her watch. "Gentlemen, please? You can come back later."

They said their good-byes and headed off to eat before the debriefing.

"Sam?" Fraiser pressed.

"This isn’t over yet, is it?"

Fraiser shook her head. "No, but it’s too soon to worry too much, Sam." She helped her lay down, and rearranged her pillows. "It’s going to take time. We’ll get you sorted out in the end."

"Yeah," she said distantly. "In the end."

Fraiser flipped off the main light. Sam lay staring into space for a few minutes before her time expired and she fell into a deep, healing sleep.

**  
**

24

She said goodbye quickly and the line went dead before he had a chance to ask her if there was something wrong. Of course they were still coming over to see her tonight. Daniel replaced the handset on its cradle and stared at it for a few moments.

"Did you talk to Sam today?" he asked Jack.

"Nope, she was in rehab when I called." Jack sensed a problem. "Something wrong?"

Daniel let his thoughts process… "Jack, do you think she’s doing okay? At the hospital, I mean?"

Jack shrugged. "Doc says she’s working hard at her rehab."

"Yeah, but is she _okay_?" Daniel slumped into his chair as he asked himself the question again. Not satisfied with any answer he could give himself, he reached for the phone.

* * * * *

Now she was mad at herself; very mad. Not only had she screwed up on the fitness test so badly, she had hurt her knee when she fell off the bike. In a moment of weakness she’d called Daniel to talk, wimped out, and now he was probably thinking she’d lost her marbles. _Why couldn’t I keep my mouth shut?_ Sam hauled her body over and pulled the pillow down to hug it. She switched off the lights using the bed remote, and pulled the covers over her.

The light from the corridor streamed in as Fraiser opened the door to her room. "Sam?"

Carter huffed.

"Sam?" Fraiser repeated, standing just inside the door. "Isn’t it a little early for your afternoon nap?"

"Daniel called you, didn’t he?" sh mumbled into her pillow

Fraiser walked slowly to the bed. "He said you sounded upset…"

"Why would I be upset?"

Janet pulled up a chair and rested her arms on the side of the bed. "Cindy told me about your test today… How’s the knee?"

Carter pulled the covers tighter, shifting uncomfortably and shrugging. "Sore, and I was just checking what time they were coming. That’s all. I wanted to take a nap."

Fraiser inclined her head. "I thought we made a promise to each other, Sam. ‘No secrets’."

"It’s no secret I want to get out of here. I want to be back at work, not lying around like a cripple. There’s nothing wrong with me except my damn leg won’t work. I’m not even getting tired like I was."

"We knew it was gonna take time, Sam."

"I’ve been here for three weeks, Janet. I just don’t feel like I’m getting anywhere."

"But you are, Sam," Fraiser encouraged. "Cindy says you’re working really hard."

"But I still can’t walk. I can’t go anywhere or do anything without help or that damn chair!" She bit off what she was going to say next, then composed herself. "I know I need to be here because I can’t look after myself, rehab’s here and that’s what I need to be doing… But…"

"But you’re bored? Unhappy? Lonely?" Fraiser supplied the words.

"Yeah, but not in that order."

Fraiser sat back in her char. "How long have you felt like this, or am I just catching you at a bad moment?"

She didn’t answer immediately. "A few days, a week. Oh, I don’t know."

Fraiser laced her fingers together in her lap. A week ago Jacob had had to return to the Tok’ra. A few days later, SG-1 had gone off world for 48 hours. They’d been late back.

"You probably have caught me at a bad time. I’m due."

"Hormones. Get you every time. But Sam, they tend to make you express things you’re already feeling."

"More like make ‘em think I’m falling apart. I can’t believe I called him!"

Fraiser patted the woman’s hand. "You called because you needed to. Now, let me see what I can do about the lonely and bored issues, hopefully the happy will work itself out, huh?"

"Okay."

Fraiser stood. "Now you get some rest."

Sam wriggled in the bed, settling. "Janet, could you call Daniel and tell him I’m okay?"

Fraiser smiled. "Sure. Now get some sleep."

Fraiser shut Sam’s door behind her, and formed a plan on the way back to her office. She had three calls to make; Cindy, Daniel and General Hammond.

* * * * *

The three men waited nervously outside Hammond’s office. They couldn’t tell whom he was talking to. Daniel was looking at his watch.

Jack caught him. "He’s a general, he’s allowed to keep us waiting."

"I don’t care what Janet said, I wanna go see Sam. I was going to knock off early…"

"You have found your conversation with Major Carter most disturbing, Daniel Jackson?"

"Yes, Teal’c. I’m sure there’s something wrong."

"Hey, Fraiser said she talked to her, right?"

"Jack, she didn’t tell Janet about 3DY did she?" Daniel got to his feet and paced nervously. "Look how that turned out."

"Daniel Jackson is correct. We must have no secrets. I will discuss it with her."

Jack glanced at Daniel and was about to agree when Fraiser opened Hammond’s door. She still had her coat on.

"Doc?"

"Come in please, gentlemen." She ushered them in.

"So, I guess this is about Sam," Daniel started.

"Yes." Fraiser said.

"You said she was okay on the phone."

"And she is, for now…."

"For now?" Jack didn’t like the way she’d said that.

Fraiser glanced at Hammond who motioned for her to continue. "Gentleman, Major Carter is an extremely dedicated and intelligent woman."

"Tell us something we don’t know."

"The rehab program isn’t going as fast as she expected. Physically she has a few problems."

"But mentally she’s okay?"

"In most respects. But she is not thriving at the Academy Hospital as she should. It’s affecting her whole outlook and recovery. She needs something more than nursing and rehab."

"What?"

"Stimulation, inspiration, company. A reason to get up in the morning other than because someone tells her."

"We’ve been over there as much as we can, Doc, and it’s you that keeps throwing us out."

Fraiser waved his jibe away. "I know, and she’s been living from one visit to the next." Fraiser paused. "So far we’ve kept her at the academy because the facilities for rehab are better at the hospital than here. But it’s not physical therapy that she needs so much as mental stimulation and that’s not easy when everything that interests her is classified. So, Doctor Warner, Sergeant Harris and I are prepared to do her rehab."

"You’ll move her back here?" Daniel exclaimed.

Hammond nodded. "We’re hoping coming back will kick start her progress again, but we’d like to involve the rest of SG-1."

"More than anything right now, she needs to stay in the loop. She’s getting cut off from everything and it’s got to stop. We’ll need your help to keep her on track."

"Whatever you require of us will be accomplished," Teal’c stated.

"How can we help?"

"Yeah, when do we start? I’m free right now." Jack rubbed his hands together enthusiastically.

Fraiser smiled and glanced at Hammond.

"Gentlemen, you have a new assignment. I have a wormhole physics expert who I need back on the duty roster ASAP. Now, you’ll still have other duties, and I can’t postpone all your missions, but I’d appreciate it if you could stay on the base for a while until she’s up and about."

"Infirmary or quarters?" Daniel asked.

"Infirmary at first, the side room. Harris will sort out the physio program, but she’ll be able to work out if she wants to as long as one of you is with her."

"How are you planning on keeping her out of the lab?" Jack asked.

Janet smiled. "I’m not. That’s the whole point, Colonel. She needs to be around people she can talk to. She needs to do normal things. Soon she’ll be moving around and walking without knowing it."

"Siler’s been pestering me for weeks to know when she’s coming back," Daniel muttered.

Fraiser raised a hand of caution. "The first couple of days’ll be rough. I don’t want her exhausting herself, but a little light duty, exercising the mind, will do her good."

"She will not exhaust herself," Teal’c intoned, drawing himself up to his full height. "I will not allow it."

"No," Daniel agreed. "We’ll keep an eye on her, Doc."

"Yeah," O’Neill added. "She’ll be fine."

"I don’t just want her to stay here," Fraiser added. "She needs to get out a bit as well, and that’s where I need your help tonight…"

"Tonight?"

"Yes. I’d like you to move her tonight."

"Does she know about all this yet?" Daniel asked.

"No."

Jack grinned, a plan forming in his mind. "Doc, could we stage a breakout?"

"A breakout? Of where?"

"General. Request permission to extract Major Carter from the hospital. Shouldn’t take much, sir. A few water guns, super-soakers, just in case any marines are around."

Hammond chuckled. "Very well, Colonel. Doctor, please ensure Major Carter is ready for extraction at 19.00 hours."

"No. Make it 18.30, then we can take her to dinner," Daniel suggested.

They all looked at Fraiser. "18.30 it is. You take her to dinner, maybe a movie, and bring her back here. I’m on call here tonight anyway."

O’Neill checked his watch. "We’ve got three hours, kids. Daniel, you book a table at O’Malley’s. I’ll draw the weapons from Teal’c’s armory and we’ll need our black ops gear." Teal’c flashed a rare smile.

"I’ll leave you people to it. Dismissed."

The three men left, chattering, planning, and scheming.

Fraiser lingered in the doorway of Hammond’s office.

"You know what, Doctor, I think they need this as much as Carter does."

Fraiser agreed. "Let’s hope they don’t drown any of my nurses in the process."

Hammond chuckled. "Black ops gear with fluorescent super-soakers… Save me the security tapes, Doctor. This I _have_ to see…"

"I’d better get back sir, thank you."

"Not at all," Hammond said. "Haven’t seen Jack or any of them that buzzed about a mission in a long time. Let’s hope it works. I’ll stop by in the morning and lay out the ground rules."

"Yes sir. Good night."

* * * * *

Fraiser was back at the hospital by 17.30. Sam was still lying in the dark.

"So," Fraiser said, flipping on the light. Carter flinched and hid her eyes. "Skipped lunch, huh?"

"Wasn’t hungry… Can you turn that off?"

"Nope." Fraiser pulled the drapes open. It was still light out. "Hungry now?"

"Depends what’s on the menu, you know the food here really is terrible."

"I can do an apple and a bag of potato chips to tide you over. You’ll have to ask Jack or Daniel about dinner, they said they’d organize something."

"Pizza probably." That’s usually what they brought, anything was better than the usual slop.

"Bath time," Fraiser ordered, "and I brought you some clean clothes. Can’t have you sitting around all evening in sweats. Not with handsome male company," she called out from the bathroom over the noise of the running water. Carter’s eyes had adjusted now to the bright light, she stretched her arms and yawned.

"Handsome? So SG-1 aren’t coming tonight."

"I’ll forget you said that," she said coming back into the room. "Now come on, they’ll be here at 18.30." 

Fraiser chatted easily with Carter about nothing of any importance, she checked her watch – almost time.

* * * * *

O’Neill jogged out of the hospital entrance his black jacket hanging open showing his bright green T-shirt. He zipped it up as he re-joined his friends outside. "She’s still in room 278. Second floor." He motioned to the back seat of his jeep. "Weapons."

Teal’c reached into the back and pulled out the Super-soakers one by one. Securing the tanks on their backs, Daniel and Teal’c zipped up their own jackets over their bright shirts. Jack pushed Daniel’s woolly hat onto his head and secured his own. Teal’c swapped his baseball cap for one also and they were ready. Well almost.

"Remember," O’Neill whispered. "Shoot only if necessary. We shouldn’t meet any resistance." He nodded to his companions. "Noses!" he ordered. They each reached into a pocket and retrieved and secured a bright red nose.

"Ready?"

"Ready!"

"I am prepared, O’Neill."

"Then let’s go!"

**  
**

25

In the security control room, Lieutenant Quinn spotted them on the front entrance camera. "Here they come guys, let’s follow them up to the second floor." One of the all in black clad men turned to the camera and waved.

"Holy Shit!" Quinn exclaimed. "That really is O’Neill." 

The sergeant in the room with him leaned over the monitor and stifled a laugh. "Is that a clown nose?"

Quinn shook his head. "Make sure you’re getting this on tape, Sergeant, General Hammond wants it." 

"We’ll have them all the way, sir." He played with the joystick, tracking one of the cameras down the hall as the figures hugged the walls.

They moved down the corridor, stealthily – well as stealthily as you can with a serious super-soaker with water tanks strapped to your back.

"The children’s ward is back that way, sir," a nurse offered helpfully.

Jack held a finger up to his lips and whispered: "We know where we’re going, thank you." They moved on smiling and waving at the nurses as they went.

"Jack, you did tell security what we’re up to didn’t you?"

"Oh yes!" O’Neill paused. "Smile Daniel, you’re on ‘Candid Camera’." He pointed to a CCTV camera in the corner, it waggled up and down as he waved at it. Daniel’s head dropped in embarrassment. "I can’t believe you talked me into this."

"Daniel, this is serious. Pay attention." He pinched Daniel’s nose making a beep, beep noise and darted off down the corridor.

Daniel followed his CO further into the hospital complex. "Serious," he muttered, "is not the word I would use." 

Once on the second floor, things got a little more complicated, except that the airmen on guard in the restricted wing were expecting them and just raised their hands in surrender and let them pass. One of them laughed, earning himself a squirt in the face.

Sam’s room was opposite the nurses station. As they approached the head nurse stood up in surprise. "Colonel?" she enquired. "Er, can I help you?"

Jack slid his back along the wall and whispered conspiratorially in her ear. "Is Major Carter alone?"

"No sir, Doctor Fraiser is with her." 

He looked disappointed. "Better knock then. Please stand back." He nodded to his team-mates and signaled with his hands as they formed up around Carter’s door. O’Neill knocked softly.

Fraiser got up and went to the door. As she opened it she raised her hands and tried desperately not to laugh. "Oh, sir," she said meekly, "please don’t shoot me."

"Turn around." 

She did as she was told and with a fluorescent pink barrel nestled in her back, walked slowly into the room. "You have visitors."

Sam couldn’t control herself. She dissolved in a fit of the giggles, slapping the bed hysterically. Jack, Daniel and Teal’c exchanged glances.

"I indicated that the noses were not necessary, O’Neill."

"Oh no, Teal’c," Carter disagreed, "they are just – just so you!"

"Daniel. Chair!" Jack ordered.

Daniel lowered his bright green weapon. Letting it dangle from its string he grabbed the wheel chair, and steered it to the bed.

"Hey what’s going on, guys?"

"You’re being Carternapped," O’Neill started. "We are the galaxy’s best Carternappers."

"Hop in, Sam," Daniel ordered, "we’re going out to dinner."

Sam shuffled to the edge of the bed. "Really? Like for real food?"

"Oh, yes!"

Sam looked at Janet for permission. 

"I seem to be at a disadvantage." She shrugged.

"Daniel, I need some help."

Daniel scooped her off the edge of the bed and placed her in the chair. "Package secured, Jack," He reported.

"Let’s move out. Teal’c, you take point." 

Teal’c went to the door and opened it a crack with the barrel of his water gun. "The area is not clear," he reported solemnly.

"Fire a warning shot!" Jack ordered. Teal’c’s eyes flashed a grin as he carried out the order. 

Fraiser rolled her eyes as a fine spray sent the curious nurses scattering and screaming. 

Teal’c looked out again. "The area is now clear of personnel," he reported smiling.

Carter smiled at Fraiser as Daniel pushed the chair from the room after Teal’c. Jack followed after them. "Colonel?" Fraiser called as they darted from the room. O’Neill whirled on her, weapon poised. "You’ve forgotten something."

"What? Major – One." He ticked her off on his fingers. "Doc we only got reservations for four…"

Fraiser fished in her pocket and tossed a small bottle to him. "Just in case," she said, "instructions on the label."

He glanced at it. "Pain meds?"

Fraiser shrugged. "Go easy on her."

O’Neill threw and re-caught the bottle and shoved it in his fatigues pocket. "Will do. See you later."

He skittered away after his team.

Fraiser wandered out into the corridor and surveyed the damage. They’d all dry out in no time.

"I take it Major Carter’s being transferred tonight, then," the head nurse supplied.

"Yes, she is."

"We’d best pack up her gear then, before the commandos get back."

* * * * *

"Hey!" Sam called, gripping the chair’s arm rest. "Slow down, Daniel, you’ll tip me out of this thing."

"Can’t stop!" They charged down the corridors and burst through a side exit door where Jack’s Jeep stood waiting. "We got a table booked for seven."

"Your chariot awaits!" Jack said with a flourish.

"You guys…"

Teal’c removed his nose before scooping her out of the chair, placing her gently in the front seat.

"Thanks, Teal’c."

They loaded up the chair and climbed aboard, swapping their black jackets for casual ones and revealing their colored shirts. Teal’c swapped back to his baseball cap and Daniel ruffled his hair back into some semblance of order.

"So," Sam asked, clipping on her seat belt, "where are we going?"

"O’Malley’s, okay?" Jack asked.

"Cool, you know the food in there is lousy." She paused as another thought occurred to her. "Beer, am I allowed beer?"

"You’re over 21 aren’t you?" Jack asked cheekily.

"But Janet didn’t say…"

"If the lady wants beer, the lady gets beer. Teal’c you’re designated driver for the way home."

"Indeed, O’Neill."

"So what time you gotta have me back?"

Jack shrugged. "She didn’t say."

"Oh." Sam suddenly looked uncomfortable, her hand instinctively rubbing her knee.

"She did give me these." He handed her the bottle.

"They’re due at 10," she said, relieved.

"You still need those?"

"I pulled my knee again this morning."

"Ouch!"

Daniel leaned over from the back. "So, should you be thinking about beer with those?"

"Actually, with beer, I probably won’t need ‘em." She smiled and pocketed the bottle.

"That’s the spirit!" With that Jack gunned the gas and took off into the night.

**  
**

26

"Have they been starving you or something?" O’Neill exclaimed.

Sam dropped the long handled spoon back into the glass. "I skipped lunch. Not worth waking up for."

"I’ve never seen you eat so much," Daniel added. "Didn’t think you’d finish that."

The sundae dish was huge and given she’d eaten a good size main course he couldn’t believe she’d scoured it clean.

Sam leaned back and patted her stomach. "Always got room for a chocolate fudge sundae. Besides, it’s therapy."

Teal’c moved his own dish across the table. His was almost clean too. "I must agree, Major Carter. Most therapeutic." 

"Told you you’d like it. You know, guys, we should do this more often."

"Okay, but give me a week’s notice so I can starve myself." Daniel downed the last of his beer. He checked his watch. "So, do you wanna catch a movie?"

Sam shrugged. "Can we just hang out here for a while?"

"Sure, want another beer?" Jack asked.

"If you insist."

"He does not," Teal’c intoned. Jack threw him a look.

"Oh. Well, I’ll have one any way, thanks!"

"Let’s move to the bar."

* * * * *

"No, that’s all right Airman, I am expecting them." Fraiser raised her eyes to the ceiling. "Yes, an escort might be a good idea. I’ll be waiting."

The three men entered the infirmary. Fraiser dismissed their escort and beckoned them in. O’Neill swayed, Daniel clung to the empty wheel chair like a crutch and Teal’c strode in solemnly, cradling the fast asleep Major in his arms. Fraiser greeted them, hands on hips. 

O’Neill flashed a cheeky grin. "Mishun accomplished, Doctor!" he said, slightly slurred, tossing her a salute.

"Teal’c, please tell me _you_ drove them here."

"I did indeed, Doctor Fraiser. Both Colonel O’Neill and Daniel Jackson have consumed too much alcohol to operate a vehicle safely."

"Who us?" Daniel asked innocently. The two men collapsed on each other in a fit of giggles.

"Okay, they are definitely drunk, so how much has she had?"

"Oh," Daniel started, furrowing his brow, thinking.

"Er," O’Neill hesitated. "Just a couple?" he tried.

"Or three…" Daniel added.

"Judging by your condition, several. Teal’c?"

"I would rather not answer, Doctor."

"She’s on medication, gentleman, she shouldn’t…."

"She didn’t take it." Jack stated clearly.

"But she’s supposed to take them. You were supposed to be looking out for her."

Jack and Daniel looked sheepish.

"She was having fun," Daniel moped.

"We were celebrating," Jack added. "She got so excited when we told her, Doc. She started making plans right away, babbling about stuff like a kid, like Sam!"

"I think it’s worn off." Fraiser motioned for Teal’c to follow her. "Come on, let’s get her settled. You two, bed! And don’t forget to drink some water. It might stop you getting a hangover."

Teal’c followed Fraiser to the side room. Daniel and Jack exchanged glances.

"Gimme a hug, Danny-Boy." They folded into each other’s arms. "We’re back!!" They separated and leaning on each other headed for their quarters.

* * * * *

Fraiser had a quiet night on call. After settling Sam she’d managed to go to sleep straight away. Her alarm woke her at 06.00. Refreshed, she rose, washed and changed and headed off to wake her new admission. She stopped off at the drug trolley.

"Morning, Teal’c," she said brightly making no effort to remain quiet.

"Good morning, Doctor Fraiser."

"How’s our patient this morning?"

"Major Carter is still sleeping."

The curled up body moaned from under the covers. "No, I’m not!" She tried to sit up. "Aw shit, my head hurts." She held her head in her hands and sank back onto the pillows.

Fraiser rattled the pills in the container making Sam wince. "Take these. It’s all the sympathy you’re going to get from me!"

Carter steeled herself against her spinning head as she eased herself up.

"You do not look well, Major Carter," Teal’c stated.

"Thanks, Teal’c, don’t feel too great."

Fraiser poured her some water and handed it to her. "Drink up, it’ll help the dehydration." She folded her arms and rocked on her heels. "Good evening was it?"

Carter sipped the water and smiled. "It was great … Look, Janet, don’t get mad at the guys. I did this to myself. No one forced me to drink."

"How many did you have?"

She shrugged, still sipping, then rubbed the bridge of her nose slowly. "Teal’c, you’re gonna have to help me out here…"

"Colonel O’Neill ordered me not to disclose such information to Doctor Fraiser."

"Did he now. Well I outrank him in this case, so spill it!"

"Spill what?"

"It’s okay Teal’c, I’ll take the flack – how many?"

Teal’c leaned over and whispered in Sam’s ear.

Sam closed her eyes and leaned back. "Feels about right."

"Teal’c?"

"Five pints, four shots," Sam muttered. "Was the beer low alcohol?"

"It was not," Teal’c informed them, then he continued before Janet could explode. "You did not stipulate Major Carter’s alcohol consumption, Doctor. It would assist me greatly in my supervisory role if you were more specific in future."

"I’m not getting into this…" Fraiser threw up her hands. "Sam you should know better. I want you to have some breakfast and get washed up by ten hundred. General Hammond wants to see you."

"Oh, what for?"

"Welcome you back and set the ground rules, which you obviously all need."

"Oh, okay."

"Teal’c, I suggest you make sure the rest of SG-1 are ready too."

Teal’c rose from his seat at the foot of Sam’s bed. "As you wish, Doctor." He paused, placing a hand on Sam’s. "It is good to have you back with us." He paused again. "Sam." He bowed slightly, then he turned and left the two dumbfounded women.

"He called me Sam," she breathed. "He never calls me Sam…"

**  
**

27

It was good to be back in uniform, even though it took ages to dress herself. The top half was okay, but the bottom half took some wriggling and a balancing act that the circus would be proud of. Things were settling down. Getting from place to place required planning and an allowance of time. Skittering about in her wheelchair was very effective, but the stairs from the gate room to the control and conference rooms were beyond her good leg’s knee. Not good at being the helpless female, she shimmied up on her backside unless Jack or Teal’c caught her, in which case she was over their shoulder and where she was going before she could protest.

"You’ll get stepped on," Jack had insisted. It was more of a pride thing than anything else.

Getting down was easier, hopping step by step, leaning her weight on the guard rail to lessen the impact on her knee. 

Then, finally, she’d slipped halfway down the last flight. The knee had buckled and she landed in a heap at the foot of the stairs.

"Those are your options, Major," Fraiser lectured. "You stay in that chair and let someone carry you up and down stairs if need be, or you stay right where you are. Two weeks!"

"But?"

"No buts! You’re lucky you didn’t break anything, or hurt someone else."

Carter rubbed her head, the strips closing the cut on her forehead were itching. "Just lost my balance," she muttered.

"You must rest your knee, Sam. It’s under a lot of strain."

"I know."

Jack bustled in. "Carter, I leave you for five minutes and…"

"I’m okay, sir," she insisted.

Fraiser glared at the colonel. "I’m restricting her to the chair for a couple of weeks. If she needs to go to the briefing room, she gets a lift. No weight on it except during physio sessions with Harris. No weights. Are we clear?"

"Yes, ma’am," Sam muttered.

"And be gracious about it for God’s sake."

"Yes, ma’am." She said.

"Okay, now get out of here before I change my mind!"

Jack steered the chair beside the bed. She lifted her legs over the edge, bending the brace on her good leg’s knee. Jack scooped her up and placed her on the chair. "Thanks," she muttered.

"Where are you supposed to be?" he asked, securing the foot plates.

"Lab, sir. MALP data review."

"Okey dokey." He released the brake and pushed her from the infirmary. Fraiser watched them go, torn between wanting to ring her neck and knowing that she needed to work. And they needed her too.

They entered the elevator alone. The doors closed.

"Carter?"

"Sorry, sir, I screwed up."

"I don’t think I’ve ever seen Doc mad at you like that. She’s been that mad at me lots of times."

"I just lost my balance, sir, my knee gave out. I only fell a couple of steps."

"Sore?"

"No, not really." Now it was braced and with no weight on it, the pain had gone. The doors opened, he wheeled her out into the corridor.

"She’ll calm down, Carter. Just stay outta trouble."

"Yes sir, but I’m still confined to this chair for two weeks."

He steered her into the lab where the science officers from SG-5 and 14 were already reviewing the MALP data tapes. They jumped to their feet as Jack wheeled her in. "As you were, gentleman."

"Sorry I’m late," Sam said, "had to take a detour."

Max King moved a stool out of the way. "You okay, Carter?" He pointed to her head.

"Yeah, she’s fine, King. Just don’t let her outta this chair."

"Sir."

O’Neill squeezed her shoulder. "I’ll get Teal’c to pop down later."

"Okay, sir."

"Have fun, kids," he said as he disappeared round the corner.

Sam rubbed her face.

"Sam?" Max asked, "what the hell happened?"

"Fell down the stairs."

"You hurt?"

"Just my good knee and my pride… Come on, what have you got here anyway?"

"This is P384HMG; interesting solar activity…"

Teal’c arrived shortly before they were due to break for lunch.

"Major Carter."

"Hi, Teal’c." She turned her chair to face him. He inclined his head.

"Your presence has been requested for the debriefing of SG-4. I am to assist you."

"Okay." She twirled herself round. "You guys okay to finish up without me?"

"Think so."

"Okay." She started rolling the chair backwards.

"We must proceed quickly." Teal’c noted, taking control.

"Wheel off, Teal’c."

Daniel was waiting at the foot of the stairs. Teal’c scooped her up in his arms and let Daniel fold the chair and go up ahead. They replaced her in the chair at the top.

"Thanks, guys."

"Glad you could join us, Major." Hammond waved Teal’c to the open spot at the table. He parked her, secured the brake and went to the side to pour her some coffee.

Fraiser eyed her from across the table.

"Sorry if I kept you waiting."

"Not at all, we’d just taken a break."

Teal’c placed the coffee beside her. "Thanks."

"Captain, can you summarize for Major Carter, then continue."

"Yes, sir." Captain Gowan rose and began.

Sam flipped open the folder in front of her and started taking notes.

Fraiser let her eyes wander round the room as he summarized the debriefing for her. Jack looked bored, hearing it all again. He was watching Sam too. Teal’c stared ahead, stood at parade rest a few steps behind her chair. Daniel was studying Sam’s head.

She snapped them all back from their musings when she interrupted Gowan with a question about gravitational fluxes on the surface. They diverted onto the train of thought losing the rest of them completely.

"Carter!" Jack stopped her mid-flurry. "Why don’t you and Gowan get together later and talk gravity."

"Yes, sir. Sorry, sir, got carried away."

"Please, Captain," Hammond pushed them on, "continue."

"Yes, sir. Gravity variations aside, the readings of seismic activity show the core to be stable. We didn’t seem to be in an earthquake or fault zone."

"The UAV pictures indicate a stable area, medium vegetation, nice forest to the east."

"Trees," Jack muttered. "More trees."

"Do you have something against trees, Colonel?" Janet had to ask.

"Not really Doc, just things have a habit of hiding behind them."

"Nature’s air filters," Daniel added.

"I know," he muttered. "So what’s the plan?"

"Sir, I recommend we set up a small research post to collect more data on the gravitational conditions. and conduct a long range UAV mission to search further afield for signs of intelligent life."

"Very well, Captain," Hammond said. "Discuss your plans with Major Carter, and submit your recommendations for the follow-up mission."

"Yes, sir."

"That’s it people. You’re dismissed."

Sam finished making some notes in her folder.

"Major?" Hammond stood by the door to his office.

"Yes, sir?"

He motioned for her to go in. She released her brakes.

"I’ve got it Teal’c, thanks." She pushed back from the table and twisting round propelled herself to her destination. He closed the door behind her.

"Major?"

"Yes, sir?" _Okay, let’s try the innocent approach._

"I need you on the duty roster, Major. I know you’re mentally capable of completing your duties, but you must understand, Fraiser has the right to pull the plug at any time. Ultimately I want you walking up that ramp with the rest of your team."

"Me too, sir."

"So how come I’m scooping you off the floor this morning?"

Her head dipped slightly. "I lost my balance, sir."

"Carter, Fraiser is this close to grounding you completely." His fingers were almost touching.

She hung her head. "Yes, sir."

"Consider yourself on probation."

"Yes sir."

"Now go on, and try and stay out of trouble!"

"Yes sir." He got up and opened the door for her.

"Thank you, sir." She pushed herself out where her porters were waiting.

**  
**

28

It was a very long two weeks. SG-1 left with SG-4 a week into her probation. She waved them good bye as they walked up the ramp to set up the research post and explore the forest to the east. Carter had been momentarily extracted from the gloom of missing yet another mission when Hammond had mentioned the forest. It was all she could do to hold herself together at the thought of Jack and those trees. Daniel and Teal’c knew they were in for a long and complaint filled trip.

She’d thought with her minders away, she’d have a little more freedom, but Fraiser had the SFs watching her and any time she tried anything there was a large SF offering assistance, or a polite "Major Carter!" to stop her in her tracks. The frustration built up steadily.

The one bright spot was things did seem to be improving on the leg front. Fraiser sent her to the Academy Hospital for a few sessions in the pool. The feeling was returning and with it some semblance of control.

By the time SG-1 returned, she could just bend it a little and her other knee would take her weight again. She’d begged Fraiser for crutches, but to no avail. So, she met them in the gate room in her chair, consoled Daniel for having to put up with Jack’s dislike of trees, and bubbled with her progress.

It had been two months since the Hladan mission had begun. The research and mining station was now well established and they had even managed to have a section of the cave complex centrally heated. Sam grinned as Gilbert enthused about the performance of one of the naquadah reactors she had modified for him. Jack smiled as she quietly lapped up the praise. Hammond was smiling too.

"Good job, people…" he said. "Doctor?"

"We have just two Hladans still on Earth with their spouses, and they will be fit enough to go home in a couple of weeks. I have just one SGC concern, General, and that’s Airman John Whitney. He’s been there since Day One. I think he could use a break."

Jack sat forward. Whitney’s continuing tenure on Hladan had delayed his barbeque plans. As it was, it would have to be a mostly indoor affair.

"Can we spare him, Daziel?"

"Sir, SG-7 can cope for a couple of days without him."

"At least a week," Fraiser insisted.

Daziel mulled it over. "We have some projections to finish up, might take a couple of days. After that we’re pretty well set up."

"Please don’t say that," Daniel muttered.

"Seriously, sir, we set off a mini avalanche yesterday. Whitney reckons we’re okay unless there’s more snowfall. We’ve got the gate inside now, anyway. Even if the cave got blocked in…"

Daniel placed his hands over his ears, shaking his head. "Please, don’t say stuff like that!"

Sam giggled and pulled his hands away. "Relax, Daniel."

"General?" Fraiser wasn’t going to be distracted.

"Very well, Doctor. Major, inform Airman Whitney he’s being ordered to take some leave. He’ll return by next Wednesday at the latest, and stay Earth-side for at least a week. Is that acceptable Doctor?"

"Yes sir," Fraiser agreed.

"Very well, thank you everyone, you’re…"

"Er, sir?" Jack interrupted. "Just one more thing? With Whitney coming back we can do the reunion. How about Saturday?"

Those eligible nodded their assent.

"Great. I’ll spread the word." Jack rubbed his hands together.

"Okay. Dismissed."

Everyone but Sam rose as the general left. They started to move off, like a well-oiled machine. Sam propelled herself to the stairs, Teal’c carried her down and Daniel took care of her chair. Before you could blink, she was all back together and skittering towards to the elevator.

"At last. Thanks Doc," Jack bubbled. 

"He needs a break, Colonel, that was my only motivation."

"Yeah, right! You just miss my barbecued chicken."

"I have a special request though, Colonel."

"What’s that?"

"Cassie?"

"Cassie’s welcome at my place any time. Just don’t forget Jack."

Fraiser followed him down the corridor. "Jack won’t let us forget him, Jack. Dogs are like that."

Sam was holding the elevator for them, shifting impatiently in her seat.

"When you gonna let her have crutches?" Jack whispered. "Those two weeks were up days ago."

"Today’s rehab." Fraiser checked her watch. "In a few hours time, you’ll be able to catch her again." Fraiser smiled sweetly. Jack had been complaining how fast she was getting. Especially if she didn’t want to talk to him. They joined her in the elevator.

"You going to 16 too, sir?"

"No, 14." Sam pushed the button for him.

"How’s the leg today, Sam?" Fraiser asked lightly

"Okay," she said brightly.

"Any pain in the knee?"

"Nope, it’s all just peachy."

"Good, rehab in half an hour then."

"Yup, just enough time to get changed." 

The doors opened.

"Ladies first."

Fraiser stepped around him and Sam pushed herself out.

"See you ladies later." The doors closed again.

"Need some help?" Janet asked.

"Yeah, thanks." Sam rolled into her room, it was one of the isolation cells but Daniel had helped her make it a little more livable. It was closer to the infirmary and the help she needed day to day.

"First order – pit stop. Then I need my sweats."

"You want to try by yourself?"

Sam looked at the doctor suspiciously.

"Harris tells me everything, Sam. You can move just fine if there’s enough to hold onto."

"I haven’t..."

"I know you haven’t. Go on."

Fraiser sat on the bed. "Holler if you need me."

Sam looked from the doctor to the door to the bathroom. Slowly she rolled towards the door, pulled it open and backed herself in.

"Don’t forget to put your brakes on!" Fraiser called out.

"Got it!"

There was a lot to hold onto, pull and brace herself against. Propped against the wall, she got herself undressed enough and had a brain wave. "Can you pass me my shorts, Janet?"

Janet opened the door a crack and pushed her arm in. The shorts were snatched from her hand "Thanks."

It was a satisfaction she hadn’t experienced in too long. That most private and intimate of actions hadn’t been so, until now.

She slipped off her boots and fatigues, made her bottom half decent, and landed back in the chair in a controlled fall.

"YES!"

Outside, Janet smiled and as the flush washed away the evidence of her success, Sam rolled back out, grinning from ear to ear.

"Well done."

"All I need now is sneakers," she said wriggling her feet, "and my top and sweats."

Fraiser stood and extended her arm. "Well, go on then, Miss Independent."

"Janet." Sam pushed her gently out of the way, rolled round, collected the items and dressed herself.

"See, didn’t need my help at all. Let’s go."

"You coming with me?"

"Just for a while. Then I have some other patients to see. I do have other patients, you know."

When they entered the room, Harris was adjusting the weights for his next session.

"Hi, John."

"Hi, Sam," he said without turning.

"Hello, Sergeant."

He turned and rose. "Doctor Fraiser. Hi, anything wrong?"

"No way," Sam said flopping out of the chair onto the mats for warm up. "Everything’s great."

Harris glanced at Fraiser.

"Oh, you guys just go ahead. I’ll just watch."

"Okay." Harris slid onto the floor beside Sam and together they stretched out.

"Okay, what’s first today?" Sam sat on the mats, the soles of her feet together, hands in her lap.

"Today," Harris said getting up and going over to a hidden corner, "You’re getting a new friend." He plucked the contraption from its hiding place. "Barney," he said. "Barney the Brace."

"Oh Goodeee," Sam said.

"Oh, but he has friends too." Harris pulled them out one by one. "Chocky and Chip."

Sam’s gaze darted to Fraiser. "Crutches! Yes!"

Fraiser smirked. "See, this is a two-man fitting crew. Let’s get you geared up." 

They adjusted the crutches.

"I’ll leave you two to it then."

"Bye, Doc," they chorused.

"Okay, Sam, what do you want to do first?"

"Stairs." She said waggling Chocky at the small practice steps in the corner. "I have to do stairs."

"Okay. These are pretty shallow, but let’s just work on the technique…"

**  
**

29

Slowly Jack scanned the gathered men and women. This was a good idea. The awards had gone well and now everyone had eaten, they were settling in each other’s company. Now the music was playing gently in the background, dance partners had become limited to Janet, her nurse, Annie, Cassandra and Carter. 

Carter. Apart from the brace on her leg he wouldn’t have been able to tell she had a care in the world. Much less that she had been piecing her life back together for the last few months. Things hadn’t been normal since they went to Poncholand. He shivered and took another swig of his beer. _Not a care in the world._ He thought. Over just the last week she’d bounded ahead in the recovery stakes. Her injured leg was painful but that was good. Strength and co-ordination were returning. She’d moved easily around the house since she arrived. So easily that when the music changed and a harmonica rang out across the living room, Daniel had suggested they dance and she’d accepted, setting aside her crutches. It was an appropriate song for them, he thought quietly to himself.

_  
_

The road is long,  
With many a winding turn,  
That leads us to who knows where,  
Who knows where…

She had to lean, but with her arms draped round Daniel’s shoulders and his hands resting lightly on her hips they swayed gently with the music.

_  
_

But I’m strong, strong enough to care, oh yeah,  
He ain’t heavy, he’s my brother…

She’d rested her head on Daniel’s shoulder now and her eyes wandered and settled on Jack. Jack waved his beer and smiled. She flashed a smile back.

_  
_

So on we go, his welfare is my concern,  
No burden is he to bear, we’ll get there   
For I know he would not encumber me   
He ain’t heavy, he’s my brother…

Jack looked on from the kitchen letting the words of the song wash over him. She was smiling now, sharing a joke with her adopted brother.

_  
_

If I’m laden at all,   
I’m laden with sadness,   
That everyone’s heart isn’t filled with the gladness of love  
For one another 

It’s a long, long road from which there is no return  
While we’re on the way to there, why not share  
And the load doesn’t weigh me down at all   
He ain’t heavy, he’s my brother…

The harmonica interlude wafted across the living room. "Jack, you know how to throw a party," Janet said.

"Thanks," he replied distantly. He wandered over to the CD player, and ran his finger down the edge of the stack of CD’s in their cases. Pulling one he examined the listing, and loaded up the second deck as The Hollies played out… 

_  
_

He’s my brother…  
He ain’t heavy,   
He’s my brother…

The last lines faded and Jack was behind Daniel. "May I?"

Daniel stepped away, for an instant she hesitated.

"Don’t fall over," Daniel quipped.

"The host and the guest of honor always get to dance," Jack justified his cutting in.

"I thought Whitney was the guest of honor."

Jack placed his hands gently on her hips. "He’s not my type."

The next track started playing, Jack smirked as she recognized the cords and Bill Withers started humming…

_  
_

Sometimes in our lives, we all have pain   
We all have sorrow,  
But, if we are wise,  
We know that there’s always tomorrow.

She shifted her weight and stumbled, falling into his arms. She straightened up, smiling, shooing the concerned Janet away with her eyes. She tightened her grip on him.

_  
_

Lean on me,  
When you’re not strong,  
And I’ll be your friend  
Somebody to lean on  
.  
Please swallow your pride  
If I have things you need to borrow  
For no one can fill those of your needs  
That you don’t let show.  
Lean on me…

"There’s a lesson there, Sam." 

"I know," she smiled sheepishly. "I’m a quick study." 

_  
_

If there is a load you have bear,  
That you can’t carry   
I’m right up the road,  
I’ll share your load if you just call me…

They had twisted round so that Sam was now facing Daniel and Teal’c sitting side by side on the couch.

Daniel smiled at her, Teal’c inclined his head regally.

_  
_

You just call on me brother, when you need a friend.  
We all need somebody to lean on.  
I just might have a problem that you’ll understand  
We all need somebody to lean on…

"Thanks for everything," she said quietly, tightening her grip into an imperceptible hug. They all heard or saw her say the words of thanks. Jack returned the grasp and Daniel flashed his winning smile.

"You are most welcome," Teal’c said softly with a nod of his head.

**  
**

EPILOGUE

It was Monday morning. The first Monday of the new year. She had drawn a very thick line under the last six months. The briefing was over, they were all geared up and ready to go.

"So what are we waiting for?" Jack asked impatiently.

"Sam had to go to her locker for something," Daniel supplied.

Jack started to mumble something.

"Give her a break, Jack. She’s out of practice at packing."

"Packing? How can she not be good at packing? She had so much stuff in that apartment of hers my back hurts just thinking about it."

"It was your idea for us to help her to move. Besides it’s a nice place and she likes it."

"I know. It’s in a better neighborhood too." He checked his watch.

Daniel looked at his own. "She’s not late, Jack."

"Not yet."

She skidded round the corner and slowed to a walking pace as she entered the gate room. Purposeful but not hurried.

"Carter!" O’Neill called. "We nearly forgot you were coming with us on this one," he teased as Daniel elbowed him.

"Sorry sir, had to pick up some supplies."

"Supplies?" 

The gate ring started to rotate and the chevrons locked one by one. The vortex splashed into the gate room and receded leaving the shimmering event horizon to cast a rippling blue glow on their faces. She stared for a few seconds at the water effect.

"SG-1, you have a go." Hammond’s voice over the tannoy disturbed her musings.

"With pleasure, General," O’Neill called out. "Carter, you wanna lead on?" he gestured up the ramp.

She looked at the three men waiting at the foot of the steps for her. _This is it…_ Her eyes drifted up to the control room. Janet, standing beside Hammond, met her gaze and smiled as Carter mouthed: _THE END_. 

"Carter? Ladies first."

"Yes sir." She started up the ramp.

"Those supplies, Carter?" he pressed again, following a few steps behind her. She stopped just before the event horizon and turned towards him. "Nothing vital, sir. Just thought it must be my turn to bring the marshmallows." She grinned and disappeared through the event horizon. 

Daniel and Teal’c stepped after her smirking at him.

Jack let his head drop for an instant. "We’re back…" he whispered to himself as he stepped forward letting the wormhole drag him halfway across the galaxy.

_  
_

We are so back…

**The End**

  


* * *

  


> For Mumsey, you have given me the world. Here’s a little something back.
> 
> This story has been around a bit, after appearing on the net it was won a Stargate Fan fiction Award and was then published in IRIS code#3. 
> 
> Since it was last on the net, I've had re- edit and corrected some mistakes so, thanks to Lems for the re-beta and Denise for her friendship and encouragement. I don't know anyone else who can Sam bash like we do! : )

* * *

> © October 2004 All publicly recognizable characters and places   
> are the property of MGM, World Gekko Corp and Double Secret Productions. This   
> piece of fan fiction was created for entertainment not monetary purposes and no   
> infringement on copyrights or trademarks was intended. Previously unrecognized   
> characters and places, and this story, are copyrighted to the author. Any   
> similarity to real persons, living or dead, is coincidental and not intended by   
> the author.   
> 

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